Rainstorms
by shortie990
Summary: Sequel to Snowflakes. The year is 2021 and Alex has been released from Litchfield, after serving an eight year sentence. How have things changed for her and Piper over the years?
1. Prologue

Do not own Orange Is the New Black or any of the characters.

So here is just a sneak peak of that sequel I promised for Snowflakes. It's short. But if I get enough feedback, there will be more.

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><p><span><strong>Rainstorms<strong>

_**Prologue**_

_Hello and Goodbye_

_August 2021_

There had been so many times within their relationship together that they had parted ways for a bit. Whether it be at the end of a date and not being to see each other until the next week or longer. Or one of them, usually Piper storming out after a heated argument. It didn't seem to matter how long though, they always ended up finding their way back to each other. Even if it took six years sometimes.

Their paths always crossed back to one another like a weaving.

They had found each other once again in prison.

And it was happening yet again, as Alex watched as she stepped into the busy Starbucks.

Alex saw Piper before she saw her.

Her heart skipped a beat at seeing her, years after. She both hated and loved how she still could have an affect on her like this. Her stomach twisted with nerves and excitement at seeing her old lover. She didn't know what they were going to say to each other. It had been so long, now.

Four years had passed since they had last spoken.

And none of it had been good to say the least.

Piper had once again walked out of her life. However, this time it had been Alex's choice.

Alex leaned back in her seat and took a sip from her Americano as she continued to look across the room to the woman who no matter what, always seemed to have her heart. Her hair was longer, she noted. She had it pulled back off of her face and up into an unkempt pony tail. She watched as the blonde shook out her umbrella and scanned around the room for her.

Alex held her breath as Piper's eyes found hers.

Time seemed to stand still at that moment as old lovers were reunited. A spark of something coursed through both of them as blue orbs fell onto green ones. A mix of old feeling began to stir like a beast being awoken.

Alex swallowed hard as she put her coffee down onto the small table at the back corner of the coffee house and rose to greet Piper.

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><p><em>October 2015<em>

It was raining heavily outside as they stood together on the landing of the stairs. Neither dared to speak a word as they watched the rain pour down the window.

Piper's going-away party was still going on in the rec room. Both of them had escaped an hour earlier from the party.

Neither of them were in the party mood.

Tomorrow was not a day they were looking forward too.

Ever since Piper had stepped into Litchfield, she couldn't wait to go home and back to her life. But now, she was regretting leaving. She didn't want to have to say goodbye to the friends she had made here. To the life she had created. It was funny but she couldn't help but think about how much she would miss it here, once she left. She knew she wouldn't miss the constant supervision and rules of the place. But the people. The strong women that she lived beside, shared the same air, occupied the space with.

And then there was Alex.

"Hey," whispered Alex tenderly as she wrapped her arms around Piper, who had began to cry. "We said we wouldn't do this. We wouldn't get upset or sad."

"I know...I know...I'm...sorry," mumbled Piper into Alex's neck as she hugged her back. She was trying to be strong but was failing. She didn't want to say goodbye.

"Remember this isn't goodbye, kid. We're still going to see each other. Maybe not every day but at least once a week or so. You're still going to come visit," explained Alex as she brought a hand up and caressed the side of Piper's face.

Piper lifted her eyes and locked them with Alex's. She nodded her head in understanding at this. She knew that they wouldn't be a part forever. That she would see Alex again. But it still hurt to think about it. Alex had been her rock over the last year at Litchfield. She didn't know how she would handle her demons on her own after leaving tomorrow. She was scared she was going to break and fall back into that person she had been before hand.

"I'm scared," admitted Piper like a small child. Her blue eyes once again welding up in tears.

"Pipes," whispered Alex tenderly, "There is nothing be scared about. The scariest part has passed. You're finally getting out of this shit hole." A small smile appeared on her face before she leaned forward and brushed her lips against Piper's.

This wasn't goodbye, she thought to herself as the kiss deepened. Yes, she still had six years to serve but Piper promised to wait for her. That she would come visit every week and that they would write to each other. That they would see this thing through together.

Alex wouldn't allow for herself to cry or be sad. For not only Piper's sake but her own. She needed to remain strong for her sanity.

For this wasn't goodbye, she thought.

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><p>Okay, so I know it might seem a little confusing a first but stay with me. Everything will come together, I promise.<p>

Thanks for reading and please leave your thoughts in a review!

Julie


	2. Chapter 1

Do not own Orange Is the New Black or any of the characters.

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><p><span><strong>Rainstorms<strong>

_**Chapter 1**_

_Released_

_April 2021_

"Stay here Vause," spoke Bennett as he escorted Alex into a holding room.

Alex didn't say anything as she stepped pass the CO and into the small room. The room was bare except for two metal chairs along one of the walls. She didn't bother to look at the CO as he closed the door behind her. She let out a deep breath as she took a seat on one of the chairs.

She didn't know how long she would be in here for. She might as well make her self comfortable she thought. Her heart was pounding slightly as she stared out onto the white brick walls of the room. She was feeling a mix of emotions at the moment. She couldn't believe that this was finally all happening to her. That it was finally her time to leave Litchfield.

Over the eight years that she had been here she had seen a lot of people go. She was the last of the 'original' subs to go. Nicky had been the first. Then Piper. Followed close by Lorna. Big Boo and Yoga Jones had left just a few months ago. Red was the only one left that Alex really knew. She had made a few new friends but kept to herself for the most part.

Alex ran her hand through her hair as she waited for Bennett to come back. In just a little while, she would be a free woman. She was both scared and happy about this. She was scared about how different the world would be outside the razor wired fences. She didn't know how she would be able to cope. But at the same time, she wouldn't have it any other way. She was ready for this. Her life had been on hold for the last eight years. She was ready to start over and live again.

A good five minutes or so passed before the door to the holding room opened and a new CO appeared. Alex rose to her feet immediatly at this.

"Let's go," snarled the CO in a monotone voice. The officer's name was Parker and he was new. He reminded Alex of Pornstache who had gotten promoted and left Litchfield a couple of years ago now.

Alex didn't say anything in reply to this as she followed Parker out of the room and was escorted down the hallway to another room. Alex had never been to this part of Litchfield before and if she had, she didn't remember it. The room was bigger then the last one had been and looked more like a reception room at a doctor office. There was a large window in one of the walls where Officer Fisher was seated behind. Alex was told to stand behind the marked white line that was on the floor, just a foot away from the security window.

Parker walked up to the window and tapped on it. Drawing the attention of Fisher behind it.

No one spoke a word as the security window was pushed opened and Fisher looked from Parker to Alex and back.

"Name?" asked Fisher in bored sounding voice. The young CO had toughen up over the years she had been at Litchfield. She was still one of the nicer correctional officer but she had grown a pair since being here.

Alex looked on at Fisher coldly for a second before replying. "Alex Vause," she answered, matching the CO monotone voice.

The two of them held each other eyes for a second before the officer looked down at the clipboard in her hands. She flipped through a few pages before coming across the one she had been looking for. Fisher then turned her back towards Alex and disappeared behind a door, that Alex had just noticed was there.

Alex just looked at her feet as she stood there waiting for the officer to come back with her things. She was here to retrieve the belongings she'd on her at her arrest. She seemed to stand there forever, listening to Parker, who stood behind her, whistling an off-key version of Bon Jovi's Living On a Prayer.

However, it wasn't too much longer before Fisher returned to the small clerk office with an cardboard box in her hands. No one said anything as Fisher placed the box down onto the desk behind the window and read out the name scribbled on the side of it. "Vause, Alex. 1925-0425." Fisher then motioned for Alex to hand over her ID badge that was clipped to the front of her uniform.

Not a word was exchanged between the two women as Alex unclipped her ID badge and slid it across the counter to Fisher. The younger woman face was blank of emotion as she took the badge from Alex and compared the numbers on it. She then proceed to open the box. On top, lay a piece of paper which listed the contents of it. Fisher read off the list before putting it down and proceeded to pull item after item out of the box. Each item was in a plastic zip-lock bag.

"One graphic t-shirt."

"One pair of blue jeans."

"One navy blue hoodie."

Alex was thankful that Nicky had been able to send new clothes in before her release. When she had arrived at Litchfield it had been straight from the court. She had been wearing a black suit and blouse.

"One pair of woman's black Converse, size 11."

Fisher stacked all of Alex's items neatly on top of one another before reaching for the last thing in the box, which was Alex's wallet. Fisher then read out the contents in it. There was Alex's driver license, which was expired. There was her health card. A library card. A few credit cards. $100 in cash and a picture of her and her mom. Fisher placed the wallet with all the rest of Alex's belongings before motioning for her to take a step forward to the window.

Alex slowly did what she was told and signed the bottom of the sheet that Fisher had just read from. She then slid the sheet back towards Fisher and let out a deep breath. She couldn't believe that this was it. That in just a few more minutes, she would be finally walking out of Litchfield.

Fisher scanned over the sheet before placing it to the side and handing over Alex's items. There was a slight smile now on the CO's face. "Good luck out there, Vause," she whispered in a low voice, so that only Alex could hear her.

Alex, who was taken back by this sudden change in character just looked at Fisher for a second before returning the smile. She nodded her head in thanks before taking her items from her. Her items had just been released back to her.

"Come on Vause," spoke Parker suddenly into her ear before escorting her to another holding room. It was here, Alex was told to strip and change into her civilian clothes and out of her prison entire.

xxx

Alex felt like she was in a dream as she stepped out of the prison grounds. She was by herself. There were no COs around, lurking, telling her what to do.

She was alone.

She was free.

It was raining heavily but she didn't care. It seemed like forever since she had felt rain on her face. She titled her head upwards and allowed the rain to fall on her for a moment or two before she was interrupted by a car approaching.

Alex immediatly took a step back and towards the fence. She was on the other side for once but she still reached for it out of safety. Her green eyes bore into the car, which had just pulled up a few feet from where she stood.

Her heart pounded rapidly against her chest cavity as she heard the engine turn off and the driver's side door opened. She held her breath in anticipation of what was to come next.

"Vause!" cried out Nicky as she appeared around the back end of the car and smiled warmly at Alex.

Alex had known that Nicky would be the one picking her up but it felt surreal to her as she lay eyes on her friend. She felt tears prick her eyes but she quickly blinked them away. She smiled broadly back at Nicky as a feeling of joy washed over her.

"Nichols!" she answered back as she enclosed the space between them and embraced the other woman.

The two of them just stood like this for a moment or two longer in the rain before Nicky, pulled away.

"This is nice and all but can we get in the fucking car? I don't know if you have notice but it's fucking pissing out!" spoke Nicky, an amused look plastered on her face as she looked up at Alex.

Alex just chuckled in reply at this before following Nicky to the car. It was good, really _fucking_ good to see her friend again.

* * *

><p><em>November 2015<em>

"Happy Thanksgiving!" whispered Piper into Alex's ear as they embraced.

"Happy Thanksgiving!" whispered back Alex.

The two women continued to hold one another before one of the guards on duty told them to break apart. Piper couldn't help but snigger slightly at this as she pulled away from Alex and looked over to where O'Neill was standing, watching.

His facial features softened a little as he locked eyes with her and gave her a small smile in return. The CO had always had a soft spot for the blonde.

This was Piper's third time visiting Alex since getting released. She still couldn't get over how weird it was to be on the other side of the visiting room. Every time she heard a CO yell at someone, she couldn't help but jump. Thinking they were yelling at her when really they weren't.

She was free now. She had to remind herself of that.

Alex smirked across the table at Piper as they both took their seats.

"I've missed you," whispered Alex as she reached for Piper's hands and gave them a squeeze.

"I've missed you too," whispered back Piper and she had. Life out of prison was great but it still didn't make missing Alex an easier. A part of her wished that she hadn't gotten off on good behaviour and had gotten released ten months earlier like she had. At times she almost wished that the trial with Healy had gone through and the charges had not been dropped. The only reason she had been released ten months earlier was because the warrant had felt bad for her. That Healy was allowed to walk free. Her lawyer had said that it was because she had been good for most of her sentence, despite her two times in SHU and almost beating Pennsatucky to death. But Piper knew there was something else to the story.

Piper could finally now understand why Taystee had come back to Litchfield after getting released. The real world was a much different ball-game from the bubble that one lived in, in prison. Yes, she was free to do what she wanted at all hours of the day. However, she missed the almost simple ways that had been Litchfield. In the real world she had responsibilities. She had to find a place to live and start making an income again. Her and Polly still had the soap business but things were a little rough at the moment. Piper also had her patrol officer to report to every week, checking up on her.

Neither Alex or Piper spoke another word for a second as they continued to get lost into each other's eyes. On these visits, things were always a little awkward between them at first. They were still adjusting to this new arrangement of theirs. With Alex here in Litchfield and Piper out there, starting over her life.

Alex let out a sigh as she down-casted her eyes onto the table before looking back up at Piper. She hated this. But didn't want to admit it. Her and Piper always made an effort not to complain to the other.

Everything was kept upbeat and light.

For no matter how much they wanted things to be different, they wouldn't be. There was nothing they could do to change the situation they were in.

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><p>Thanks for reading and don't forget to review!<p>

Julie


	3. Chapter 2

Do not own Orange Is the New Black or any of the characters.

Okay, so more will be revealed in this chapter. The last two had just been leads up to this one.

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><p><span><strong>Rainstorms<strong>

_**Chapter 2**_

_The Past, The Present and The Future_

_August 2021_

Adele's One and Only was playing from the speakers as Piper stepped in the Starbucks and shook out her umbrella. The place was crowded she noted as her eyes scanned over the tables looking for an old face.

Her heart pounded against her chest. She was nervous and anguish to see Alex again. She knew she had been out for some time now but when Nicky had mentioned that Alex wanted to see her, she had been surprised. They hadn't parted on the best of terms. No, they had parted on shitty terms.

Alex had been furious with her and had told her to stay the fuck away.

Piper hadn't been surprised by any of this. She had deserved it. What she had done to Alex all those years ago had been terrible. Especially, after everything Alex had done for her while in Litchfield. Alex had seen her through one of the worse times in her life. She had been her rock. Her support. Even when she hadn't wanted it. Alex had been there for her.

And Piper had thrown it all away with one stupid mistake. A part of her wish she hadn't done it. That she could take it all back what she had done. But at the same time, if given the choice. She would probably do it all over again.

She might had fucked up her relationship with Alex.

But something good had come out of it all and for that, she wouldn't change nothing.

Piper stood, hovering at the door, clenching the handle of the umbrella for a few moments longer before her eyes fell onto the face she had been looking for.

Her blue eyes locked immediatly with Alex's as she began to make her way towards her. Her heart flutter slightly at seeing those green eyes again. After four years of being apart, Alex still looked the same. There were a few more lines around the corners of her mouth and at her eyes but despite all that, she looked more beautiful then ever, thought Piper.

Time seemed to go in slow motion during those few seconds it took her to enclose the space between the door and Alex's table at the back of the Starbucks.

"Hi," spoke Piper, suddenly feeling very shy.

"Hi," greeted back Alex, her green eyes piercing into Pipers.

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><p><em>January 2016<em>

"I never get use to this," confessed Piper towards Nicky as they drove up the hill towards Litchfield. "No matter how many months its been since I was in there. I can never get use to driving up. I keep on thinking I'm self surrounding again. That my life is completely over."

Nicky casted a sideways glance over at Piper at this. "I know what you mean, Chapman. It never gets easy."

"I thought when I left Litchfield that would be it. I would never have to step foot passed the razor wired fences again. But here I am, back every week. And no matter how hard I try. All those old feelings come rushing back and it's like I never really left the place," explained Piper as she looked out the passenger's window and onto the passing grounds of the prison yard. "Don't get me wrong. The minute I see Alex, it's okay. I love seeing her. It's just..."

"You don't have to explain it too me, Chapman. I get it. I never thought I would be coming back to this joint after I did my time. But I never thought I would fall in love either in this shit-hole," replied Nicky with a smirk. "Life isn't always what you planned it would be."

Piper just stared at Nicky for a moment before looking back out the window. It was raining heavily outside. It had been a very wet January this year. She hadn't thought she would either. She hadn't thought she would fall in love with Alex Vause all over again. Nicky was right. Life wasn't what she planned on it being. She always thought after she served her time, that she would be marrying Larry and having his babies.

However, things couldn't be farther from that. She was with Alex now. She had seen Larry once since getting out of Litchfield but that had only been a flook accident. Yes they still had mutual friends. But they had both moved on.

Yes, life wasn't always what you planned it would be, she thought as they approached the prison. And everything that had happened behind those doors came flooding right on back to her.

* * *

><p><em>August 2021<em>

An eerie silence fell between Alex and Piper as they sat across from one another. Neither knew what to say as they continued to look at each other. Alex drank slowly from her coffee while Piper dunked her tea bag up and down in the hot water, fidgeting They hadn't yet to say anything since arriving.

"I was a little surprise you wanted to see me," spoke Piper as she put the plastic lib back onto her cup. Her blue eyes piercing into Alex's with curiosity, "Especially after so much time has passed."

"Excuse me?" asked Alex, cocking an eyebrow at Piper. "I didn't _want_ to see you. This little meeting wasn't my fucking idea!" Her voice was filled with rage as she looked back at Piper with surprise.

Piper was taken back by this, "And what? You think it was mine!?"

The two ex-lovers continued to glare at each other for a second in mutual hatred before it dawned on them, who's real idea it was.

"Nicky!"

"That little son of a bitch!"

It all made perfect sense now.

Nicky had been the one to tell both of them that the other wanted to see them and had pressed the issue until they agreed to it. Alex and Piper caught each other eye and smiled nervously at each other as their anger faded away. They shared a moment of brief hatred for their friend before looking away.

Another awkward silence falling over them.

Now that it was figured out why they were here on a rainy Sunday afternoon and who had put them in this situation; they didn't know what to do. Neither, Piper or Alex really wanted to be here. The only real reason they had come in the first place was because they thought that the other wanted to meet up and talk.

"So," spoke Piper as she lowered her cup and once again looked on at Alex. She knew that Alex didn't want to be here and neither did she really. But she was going to make an effort to at least have a civil conversation with her ex. "How are you?"

Alex didn't say anything at first as she leaned back in her chair and studied the woman seated across from her. She pursed her lips slightly as she cocked an eyebrow in puzzlement. She didn't understand why Piper was trying.

"How am I?" she asked, a slight smirk suddenly appearing on her face. "I'm just _fucking_ peachy, Pipes!" Her voice was dripping with sarcasm.

"Oh fuck you, Alex!" cried back Piper in outrage. "Can't we have at least one conversation without you biting off my _fucking_ head, uh? Look we both don't want to be here, but I thought maybe...I though for once that..."

"What that we could be friends or something?" asked Alex as she bitterly cut Piper off and glared at her.

"I dunno!" cried back Piper, "I just thought that...I dunno maybe we should try. Since we have mutual friends in common and..."

Alex couldn't help but laugh in Piper's face at this. Piper had never been the best of thinking things through but she had defiantly gotten worse over the years, thought Alex to herself. "I think we'll survive," she answered in a low voice before reaching for her coffee and draining the rest of it.

Piper just rolled her eyes in response to Alex's behaviour. After four years, Alex was still as stubborn as ever it seemed. "Fine," she stated with a small shrug of her shoulders. If Alex wanted to be nothing then fine. She could do that.

Neither spoke another word to each other for the longest time after this. They were both pissed off at the other. Piper slowly drank from her tea while Alex nervously drummed her fingers on the edge of the table. They wanted to leave but couldn't seem to find the courage to do so. For they knew that once they walked out that door that would be it.

They didn't want to say goodbye again...just not yet.

Alex let out a deep sigh before pulling out her phone and checking the time on it. She still had time to waste until her meeting. Another sigh escaped her lips as she pocked the phone back into her jeans.

"If you have somewhere else you need to be, go..."stated Piper, who had been watching Alex the whole time. There was no point of them sitting here in discomfort for longer then they had too.

Alex looked up at Piper at this. Their eyes locked for a moment.

"Alex, I won't be offended if you leave," continued on Piper as she lowered her now lukewarm tea onto the table. Her voice was soft and sincere. All the hatred from a moment ago was gone.

"To be honest, I don't really have anywhere else to go," replied Alex in honesty.

"Neither do I," replied Piper in a whisper. She gave Alex a small smile before looking down at the surface of the table. She was suddenly feeling very shy underneath Alex's gaze.

"So, how's the soap business?" asked Alex after a moment had passed. She knew very little of what had become of Piper's life in the last four years. And she had made an effort of not knowing. But with the blonde seated across from her, curiosity was getting the better of her.

"It's going good," answered Piper as she nervously played with her ponytail," Polly no longer does it though. She had her hands full with two kids and such...it's just me running the show..."

Alex nodded her head in understanding at this. "So things are good then?"

"Yeah, I guess you could say they are. I can't complain," she replied with a slight smile. Life was good for the most part for Piper. She was a successful business woman who made up her own hours.

"How are things with you?" asked Piper towards Alex. There was genuine concern edged in her eyes. "I remember when I first got out I was a mess...I still can't sleep in the dark."

"Things are..." Alex's voice trailed off slightly as she tried to find the right words. Things sucked at the moment. But she wasn't going to tell Piper that. Yes, she had trouble sleeping in complete darkness. After eight years of sleeping in the light, it had become a habit of sorts. Yes, she still woke up at 5am to use the bathroom.

"Things are okay," she finally decided on. She didn't want Piper's pity or concern. She didn't plan on seeing the blonde again after this little meeting. The little information that Piper knew about her life outside of Litchfield, the better. Alex adjusted her glasses on the bridge of her nose as she peered back at Piper. The blonde's face was hard to read. She couldn't tell what she was thinking anymore. Alex was suddenly sadden by this. She had once known Piper like the back of her hand. But she didn't know this Piper that sat across from her. This was a new, grown up Piper.

"Nicky said you were working at a hotel or something?" It was more of a statement then a question.

"Um yeah," replied Alex, who had begun to fidget with her now empty coffee cup.

"That's good."

"I'm a _fucking_ maid!" cried Alex, her voice rising slightly. "How is that fucking good? I'm basically doing the same thing I did for eight years in Litchfield, laundry!"

"Look I didn't mean any harm. I'm just saying it's good that you have a job..."

"It's just...This isn't how I imaged my life would be out of Litchfield. I didn't think I would be doing people's _fucking_ laundry again," she admitted. Alex just hated how her life was at the moment. She was 44 and she felt like she hadn't done anything protective in it, except move large amounts of heroin across the ocean. Not to mention she had lost eight years of her life to prison. She hated starting over. She felt like she should have her shit figured out by this point in her life but she didn't.

"You'll figure it out," whispered Piper after a moment had passed. "You always do."

Alex looked up at Piper and locked eyes with her.

There was something still there between them.

They both felt it at that moment.

It was hard to describe but it was always like that for them. They had a connection that ran deep. Neither spoke a word as they continued to look at one another. However, the spell was quickly broken as someone interrupted them.

"MOMMY!"

Both Alex and Piper tore their attention away from one another and looked towards the door, where a little girl with blonde hair was headed to their table.

Piper's face broke out into a grin as she reached out for her daughter.

"Mommy! Mommy!" cried the little girl as she tried to get her mother's attention.

"Hi sweetie!" whispered Piper to her little girl as she wrapped her arms around her small frame and pressed a kiss to her forehead before rising to her feet. Piper was taken back by seeing her daughter. Larry wasn't suppose to drop her off for another hour or so. "Where's daddy?" She asked looking down at the four year old before looking up to see Larry approaching.

"What are you doing here?" asked Piper in utter shock towards her ex. "You said you would take her until six!"

"I know, I'm sorry," apologized Larry, "Something has come up at work and I gotta go."

Piper just frowned at this. This was not how today was suppose to go she thought. She ran a nervous hand through her ponytail as she looked away from Larry briefly and back onto Alex. She knew that Alex wouldn't to be happy with this interruption. She had made it perfectly clear to her four years ago that she didn't want to have anything to do with her or her daughter.

Alex wasn't looking at Piper thought, her attention was on this miniature version of Piper seated across from her. She had known that Piper had a daughter but it felt surreal to her now, seeing her in the flesh.

"Who are you?" asked the little girl towards Alex. Her brow fussed together in seriousness.

"I'm Alex," replied Alex slowly in a daze. She adjusted her weight in her seat as she fidgeted with her glasses.

"Hi!" whispered the little girl, her face suddenly breaking out into a smile, "I'm Isabelle Nicole Bloom-Chapman but everyone calls me Issy." Her little voice was filled with pride at stating her full name.

Alex didn't say anything in reply as she continued to look on at Issy with awe. Her hair was the colour of straw. Her face was heart-shaped with rosy red cheeks. She looked exactly like Piper, except for the eyes. Where Piper's were blue, Issy were brown.

Alex found herself being torn between loving her and hating her.

For this little girl was the reason, she had let Piper go.

* * *

><p>Thoughts?<p>

I promise more will be explained in the next chapter.

Thanks for reading.

Julie


	4. Chapter 3

Do not own Orange Is the New Black or any of the characters.

Thanks for all the reviews and support so far. :)

Enjoy!

* * *

><p><span><strong>Rainstorms<strong>

_**Chapter 3**_

_Little Accident _

_April 2021_

"Welcome home!" spoke Nicky as she held open the front door for Alex and gestured for her to go inside.

Alex smiled slightly in response before stepping passed Nicky and into the house. She was to be staying with Nicky and Lorna for a while until she got readjusted to normal life.

Nicky smiled warmly at her friend as she shut the door behind her. "Lorna's not home yet. She's at the floral shop today. But she should be home by 6 or something. We were thinking about taking you out for dinner. What do you say Vause?"

Alex just looked nervously down at her friend, "Sure."

She was finding everything a little overwhelming at the moment. She hadn't been out of Litchfield for even two hours yet and she already felt like crying.

"I know it's a little scary but you will get use to it," commented Nicky, sensing her friend's feelings. "Things only get better from here."

Alex didn't say anything in reply at this. She just nodded her head and adjusted her glasses on her nose.

"Well, let me give you a tour of the place and such," explained Nicky as she ran a hand through her mane of curls.

Alex once again nodded her head at Nicky, who then began to explain the layout of the house. Nicky and Lorna lived in a row house in Brooklyn together. It was an older house that still needed a lot of work done to it but they were slowly renovating it.

The two women stood in the mud room of the house, which was also the entry way. This small room opened up into a long hallway. There was a set of stairs running up the right wall. On the left hand side was two French doors which opened up into the main living space of the house.

"So this is the living room," explained Nicky as she lead Alex into the room. The room had an open floor plan and merged into the dinning room at the back of the house. The room was long and narrow but still space-ish. "As you can see, Lorna decorated the entire place. I gave her liberty to do whatever she wanted with it," continued on Nicky, pointing out the bright colour scheme of the room from it light pinks to more vibrate reds and magentas.

"I can most defiantly see that," commented Alex, a smile playing on her face.

The room did have Lorna written all over it.

The walls were painted white, excepted for one accent wall, which was a rich red. There was a three-seater couch in the middle of the room which had a bright floral pattern on it. There was also a matching love seat that divided the living space from the dinning room. There was also a brick fireplace within the room. It shouldn't have gone together but it did in some way, thought Alex to herself. Almost like how Nicky and Lorna were. It just worked.

They continued to stay there for a moment longer before Nicky lead her back out into the hallway and to the kitchen, which was off to the right, at the back. The kitchen didn't look like it had gotten much of a make-over by Lorna. Everything in it was white, except for the backdrop which was made up of black and white tiles. There was a small breakfast bar in the corner of the room. The kitchen also lead out onto the back patio. And also just off of the kitchen was a half bathroom and a set of stairs which lead to the basement.

Nicky briefly showed her the backyard before bringing her back up to the front of the house and up the stairs to the 2nd floor. Like the first floor, it had the same layout, with the long hallway which attached all the rooms.

Nicky lead Alex to the first room, which was the master bathroom. The next room she showed Alex was a smaller guestroom. They didn't spend a lot of time in this room however. By the looks of it, it looked like someone already lived here noticed Alex, as she took in a toy or two scattered around the room.

"Those are Issy's," stated Nicky towards Alex, noticing her staring at the toys. "She left them here last time she stayed over."

Alex didn't know who this Issy was but she just assumed it was one of Lorna's nieces or something.

There was another bedroom on the floor, which was being used as an office space. There was also another full bathroom.

Nicky then lead Alex up to the third and final floor of the house. "This is really the attic," explained Nicky as she lead Alex up a small flight of stairs, "But when we heard you were getting out, we thought you might like it for yourself." Her brown eyes looked on at Alex as she flicked on the lights and basked the whole room in light.

"It's not much but it will give you some privacy," continued on Nicky towards Alex who had gone very silent.

Alex was taken back by this gesture. She hadn't been expecting to get a whole floor to herself. All she really needed was a bed. She had nothing with her except for the clothes on her back. So it wasn't like she needed a lot of space for her things or anything. She could feel the tears stinging the back of her eyes as she continued to look around the room.

There was a large bay window that looked out onto the front of the house. There was a queen sized bed which made up most of the room. There was a dresser, a desk and a bookshelf in the room as well. Nicky was right, it wasn't much. But it was more than what Alex had had to her name in over eight years.

"Thank you," whispered Alex as she turned around to face Nicky.

"It's nothing Vause," replied Nicky with a smile, "We look out for our own."

* * *

><p><em>August 2021<em>

"Larry, this isn't fucking going to work if you keep on dropping her off every time you get called into work!" cried Piper, bitterly to her ex-husband.

"Piper, I said I was sorry! What more do you fucking want from me!?" cried back Larry. "You know that I love our daughter and hate that I can't spend more time with her. It's just this is a new job and it's going to be like this for a while." They had this conversation multiple times before about Larry's crazy work schedule. He had gotten hired just a couple of months ago at a television station working as one of the head writer's for the news.

Piper just let out a sigh at this and continued to glare at him. It amazed her still how they had been together for so long. They seemed like two completely different people now. Larry had said she had changed. But Piper didn't think so. She just thought she had finally allowed herself to be the real her and not some cookie-cutter version that Larry wanted her to be.

"How did you know I was fucking even here?" she asked after a moment had passed. When Larry had picked Issy up earlier that day, she hadn't told him she would be at Starbucks or meeting up with Alex for that matter. They talked very little about their lives now with each other. When they did talk, it was only about their daughter.

"Nicky," replied Larry. "I tried to get a hold of you but your cell went straight to voice mail. I called up Nicky thinking you were with her or something and she told me where to find you."

Piper wasn't too pleased to hear this. Nicky knew not to mention Alex around Larry. It was still a swore subject around them. He still hadn't forgiven her for leaving him for her all these years after. But Nicky was a big part of their daughter's life. She was her God-mother and would do anything for the kid. Even if it meant she had to deal with the raft of Piper.

"So what? You and Alex are back together or something?" asked Larry as he gestured over to the table where Alex was seated with Issy.

"No!" stated Piper, "And even if we were that is known of your business!"

Larry opened his mouth to say something but quickly closed it. He closed eyes briefly before opening them and looking down at his watch. "Look, I really got to go," he spoke, turning his attention back onto Piper.

Piper just shrugged her shoulders at this, "Then go!"

Larry just glared at Piper before walking passed her and over to where Issy was seated. He ignored Alex as he bend down and kissed his daughter goodbye.

"I gotta go, Iss but I'll see yea real soon!" He whispered as a bright smile appeared on his face.

"Ok, daddy!" whispered back Issy, a smile appearing on her face. Larry then planted another kiss on her cheeks before standing up and ruffling a hand through her hair. His eyes locked briefly with Alex before turning back to Piper.

"I fed her dinner already," he spoke as he handed over Issy's rain jacket and backpack to her.

"Okay," replied Piper as she took their daughter's things from him and clenched them to her chest.

"Bye."

"Bye."

* * *

><p><em>February 2016<em>

Piper was in the middle of painting her toenails a bright pink when her cell phone vibrated suddenly against the glass table top of the coffee table.

The blonde immediatly put the nail polish away before reaching for the phone. She didn't bother looking at the display as she answered the call and pressed the phone to her ear. It was just passed five in the afternoon. She'd been expecting this call.

Piper didn't bother to say anything as she listened to the usual automatic recording before pressing * to accept the call.

"Alex?" she whispered as she heard a muffled voice on the other line.

"Alex?" she repeated again when there was no answer. She didn't like this, thought Piper. Alex rarely lost her control and composure, especially around Piper. Something big must have happened, she thought as she continued to listen to the crying on the other end.

"Alex. Baby, talk to me," she whispered in a tender voice. "What's wrong?"

There was another moment of silence before there was a murmur of words spoken.

"I'm sorry," whispered Alex through her tears.

"Baby, what's wrong?" asked Piper as she sat further up the couch and pressed the phone against her ear. It was rare for Alex to call her up like this.

"Fuck..." she heard Alex as she hiccupped loudly. She was trying to compose herself.

Neither spoke a word for a moment before Alex suddenly spoke, "I just miss you."

"I miss you too," whispered back Piper. She knew this distance thing would be hard but it was being almost unbearable at times for both of them.

"I'm sorry for losing it earlier," spoke Alex, "It's just today is Morello's going-away party and it made me realise that I won't have anyone...else here...I just needed to hear your voice."

"You won't," replied Piper," Big Boo and Yoga Jones are still there. Not to mention, Red."

Alex just sighed into the phone at this. She knew that once Lorna left she wouldn't be completely alone but she still couldn't help but feel like everyone had left her. Nicky was gone. Piper was gone. And now Lorna was leaving too. They were the only real people who had kept her sane in this place the first two years she was here. And now after tomorrow, she would be on her own.

"I know it's tough..."Piper's voice trailed off slightly. She didn't know what to say to Alex to make her feel better. There was nothing really she could say. Alex still had five more years at Litchfield. A moment of silence passed between them before an idea popped into Piper's head.

"Tell me about the party."

"Pipes," began to speak Alex. She knew what Piper was doing but she didn't have the energy to play along at the moment.

"No, seriously, tell me about the party," spoke Piper, "Is it pink and yellow all around the rec room?"

Alex let out a chuckle at this, "No but there are toilet paper flowers..." She then began to explain in detail the highlights of the party so far. How Lorna had cried twice already. How Red had attempted yet again to make Ms. Claudette's Coconut cake and failed.

Piper couldn't help but laugh as Alex told her how Big Boo had started a twerking competition with the Ghetto. She could image herself there amongst them. She almost wished she was, instead of alone in Polly's apartment babysitting Finn.

She missed it there some days.

* * *

><p><em>August 2021<em>

Piper watched as Larry left before slowly turning her attention onto the table. She never thought the day would come when she saw Alex seated with Issy like she was now. When Piper had told Alex that she was pregnant and was indeed keeping the baby, she had been pissed. Alex had told Piper that she never wanted to see her again. That she never wanted her to visit her on Saturdays like she had for the passed year. She wanted nothing to do with raising a child with Piper.

And Piper for once had listened.

She stayed away from Litchfield and Alex. And put all her energy into this new life form she was growing in her stomach. Piper might have screwed up her own life but she was damn sure that she wouldn't screw up this little one's.

Piper then slowly approached the table where Issy like usual was chatting away.

"What's your favourite colour?" asked Issy towards Alex as she swung her little legs underneath the table. "Mine purple! Mommy's too."

Alex just nodded her head as she continued to look at Issy. This was too surreal for her, she thought. This little being was so like Piper, it was scaring her a little. Alex hadn't been around kids much since she was one but she never excepted them to talk this much.

"My Auntie Nicky and Lorna are wezbeein," explained Issy towards Alex. Her brown eyes were wide and serious as they focused themselves onto Alex. "Are you wezbeein too?

Alex was taken back this question. It seemed also like mother like daughter, they didn't think before speaking. Alex cocked an eyebrow at this. She pursed her lips together, fighting the urge not to smile.

"Issy! what did I tell you about asking people that question?" snapped Piper suddenly at her daughter. She then gave an apologetic look in Alex's direction. "I'm sorry. She been asking every body if they are lesbian after learning the word."

"Now, Issy. I want you to apologize to Alex," explained Piper as she turned once again to her daughter. Her voice was calm but firm at the same time. "That is a personal question you asked her. And we don't ask personal questions to people we just met."

Piper was kneeling down beside her daughter's chair. "Isabelle!" she stated firmly when Issy just stared back at her.

Alex could have sworn she heard the little girl sigh before turning to look at her. "I'm sowwy, Alex."

Alex once again found herself getting lost in those big brown eyes of Issy's. She didn't say anything for a moment before coming back to reality. "It's okay, kid. I forgive you," she whispered, a slight smile appearing on her face as she continued to look at the girl.

"And to answer your previous questions. My favourite colour is black and I am lesbian."

The little girl's eyes widened and broke out into pure joy that Alex had been in fact listening to her and had answered her questions.

Alex couldn't help but laugh in amusement at this. She had never had someone act so excited to the news she was gay.

"But black isn't a colour. It's a shade," corrected Issy to Alex, "Right mommy?" The little girl then turned her head away from Alex and over to Piper again, looking up for approval on this information.

"That's right," murmured Piper as she pulled Issy to her and kissed the side of her face before gazing over to Alex. "Black is a shade."

Alex locked eyes with Piper at this. She was fighting the urge to roll her eyes. Naturally, Piper would teach her child that black was a shade and not a proper colour.

The two women continued to stare at one another for a moment longer before being interrupted by Issy.

"Mommy, I want a cookie!"

* * *

><p><em>November 2016<em>

Piper found herself shaking as she entered her apartment. She was soaking wet but that was the furthest thing from her mind. She hadn't even noticed it had been raining as she walked the five blocks from the grocery store to her apartment building.

She was in shock.

After almost two years of not seeing his face, he had suddenly appeared out of nowhere. She hadn't even paid for her groceries. She had just ran. She didn't even know if he had seen her. She hadn't stuck around long enough to find out.

"Fuck!" swore Piper loudly as old feelings came rushing back to her. She hadn't allowed for herself to think about Healy in a while. She really thought she was over all it until today that was. But seeing the bastard, brought all those feelings back to the surface.

He looked different out of uniform but she would never forget his ugly excuse for a face.

Piper found herself begin to hyperventilate as she slid down the surface of the door and to the floor. She was shaking and crying uncontrollably. She tried to stop but that only seemed to make things worse. She wished Alex was with her. Holding her. Telling her it was all going to be okay.

But she wasn't.

Alex was far away in Litchfield.

Piper wrapped her arms around her knees as she brought them up to her chest. She tried to get a hold of the emotions flowing through her. She hated that she was acting like this again.

She just felt so depressed and lonely since leaving Litchfield almost a year ago now. Life wasn't what she excepted it to be outside of prison. She was still haunted by what happened there everyday. She missed her family there. Big Boo, Morello, Yoga Jones, Taystee, Poussey, Suzanne and Red.

Alex.

She missed her the most.

As she continued to sit there at her door and cried to herself, her phone went suddenly off in her purse. She quickly reached for it in hopes it would be Alex. However, it wasn't. It was Polly.

"Hello?" murmured Piper into the phone as she brushed the tears away from her cheeks, trying to compose herself.

"Pipes!" whispered a very upsetting sounding Polly on the other end.

"Pol, what's wrong?" asked Piper, her thoughts about Healy fading quickly from her mind as she focused all her energy onto her friend.

"It's...it's Pete...he's been in an accident..."Polly's usually loud voice was quiet and small sounding like a child's.

xxx

"I think I am going to stay with her for the night," whispered Piper to Larry as she shut the bedroom door behind her. They were at Polly's and Pete's place. It was early in the morning now. Pete, who had been riding his bike had been hit by a car on his way to work. He was stable but in critique condition. Polly had wanted to stay at the hospital with her husband but Piper and Larry had been able to convince her to come home and get some rest. Finn was with Polly's parents for the night.

"She shouldn't be alone..."continued on Piper as she looked away from Larry. She could feel the tears in her eyes and she didn't know if she had the energy to keep them in any longer. Every since the phone call, she had snapped into work mode. She had put all her shit aside for once and focused solely on her friend. This time she had been the shoulder to cry on as Pete was wheeled into surgery.

She heard Larry take a small step towards her and felt as he took her hand. She didn't try to fight him off as he pulled her into a hug. His arms felt strong and safe around her frame. She let out a deep breath before all the emotion came flowing out of her like a balloon releasing air. Her hands clenched at the back of his shirt as she cried into his neck.

* * *

><p><em>August 2021<em>

"Look Alex, I'm so, _so_ sorry about all this," whispered Piper as she lifted Issy onto her lap.

Issy was occupied with a book but she knew it wouldn't last. Her daughter had a talent of picking up words in conversations. Piper had learned that little kids were a lot smarter then given credit for.

Issy was no different.

She had the memory of an elephant it seemed. She could remember conversations and what someone had said weeks ago, word- per-word.

Especially, things she wasn't suppose to hear.

Alex just looked at Piper before shrugging her shoulders. She wanted to be mad but she knew that Piper meant it. "It's okay," she replied. Her face was blank of emotion as she stared back at Piper.

All her anger from before was gone but that still didn't change anything between her and Piper. She still didn't want to have anything to do with her after this meeting. Issy was cute but it still hurt what Piper had done to her. Especially, after everything she had done _for_ her.

It was better that they cut all ties now.

Everyone was better off if they went back to living their normal lives after this.

They continued to stare at one another before Alex's phone went off. She tore her green eyes away from Piper as she pulled out her phone and stared down at the screen.

"Fuck!" swore Alex before she answered the phone.

"Mommy, that's a bad word," whispered Issy as she suddenly lifted her head and looked up at Piper.

"SSSssshhh, baby," whispered Piper as she pressed a finger to her daughter's lips. Her blue eyes continued to look over at Alex. This conversation was clearly important, she thought.

"I know, I know. I'm sorry. I will be there in ten," spoke Alex in a rush on the phone before hanging up. She was late for her meeting with her patrol officer.

"I gotta go," she stated as she pocketed the phone and quickly rose to her feet.

Piper just nodded her head as she looked up at her ex. She didn't want her to leave but it wasn't her choice. Alex was clearly running late for something.

Alex locked eyes with Piper once again. She opened her mouth to say something but quickly closed it. She didn't know what to say. She was suddenly confused on what to do.

An awkward silence fell between them for a moment.

"Mommy, can Alex come over one day?" asked Issy as she looked up at Alex and smiled.

"I dunno, baby, maybe," whispered Piper as she looked over the top of her daughter's head and back up at Alex. "We'll see. okay?"

Issy frowned at this. She was unsatisfied with this answer. "But I want her to come over and see my new bunk bed!" replied the little girl, who was still looking up at Alex.

Alex didn't know if she should say something or not to help out Piper.

"We'll see, baby." replied Piper as she bounced her daughter on her lap. "Now, say goodbye to Alex. She got to go."

"Bye, Alex!" whispered Issy as she suddenly leaped off of Piper's lap and ran towards Alex. She wrapped her little arms around Alex's legs and hugged her.

Alex was taken back by this. She looked away from Piper and down at the little person suddenly attached to her. She didn't know if she should hug her back or not. She stood frozen like this for a second before patting the top of Issy's head.

Issy smiled up at Alex before pulling away.

Alex found herself smiling back. "Bye kid," she whispered back. She was looking down at Issy when she said this but her eyes found their way towards Piper again.

"Bye," whispered Piper, her blue eyes piercing into Alex's green ones.

* * *

><p><em>November 2016<em>

The wind whistled loudly from outside, making the windows of the apartment rattle slightly. It was still raining pretty hard. It was now a little later but still pretty early in the morning. It felt like night though. The sky was dark and grey, casting a gloomy glow into the guest room.

Piper's heart was beating loudly against her chest cavity as she continued to lay there on her back, hours after it had happened.

Larry had left but she could still feel his presence in the room.

She felt sick.

She couldn't believe what she had just done.

What _they_ had just done.

They hadn't been thinking.

She hadn't been thinking.

She could feel the tears warm on her skin as they ran down her cheeks but she did not make an attempt to brush them away. She couldn't believe that she had once again gone and screwed everything up.

How was she suppose to tell Alex that she had just slept with Larry?

Old feelings of guilt and shame washed over her. This wasn't the first time she had cheated on someone she loved. She had cheated on Larry with Alex. And now she had just gone and done the same thing again.

Except, this time, she had cheated on Alex with Larry.

* * *

><p>Okay, so what do you think? Do y'all hate me again?<p>

Please review and thanks for reading!

Julie


	5. Chapter 4

Do not own Orange Is the New Black or any of the characters.

So some of you probably won't like me after reading this, chapter. It's not the easiest read. Just a heads up- have some tissues ready.

Oh and thanks for all the support on the last chapter.

* * *

><p><span><strong>Rainstorms<strong>

_**Chapter 4**_

_Fucked_

_December 2016_

Piper felt like she was going to be sick.

Which wasn't surprising. She'd been feeling pretty lousy over the pass few weeks. But this time she really felt like she was going to puke. And not from nausea but from the sickening guilt and dread coursing through her body at the moment.

She held one hand over her mouth as the other still clenched the test in her hand. Her pale blue eyes stared down at the little plus sign reflecting back at her.

She was pregnant.

She was _fucking_ pregnant.

Tears filled her eyes as she threw the test suddenly against the bathroom door. She didn't want this. This was not suppose to happen. Her one-night stand with Larry had been a mistake. They both agreed never to talk about it again. She hadn't told anyone about it. Including Polly. No one knew and that's how it was suppose to stay.

Brushed underneath the rug and never to be talked about again.

It had been a stupid, stupid, _fucking_, stupid mistake!

If she could take back those eight minutes. She would've in a heart beat. But she couldn't. What was done was done and now she had to lay in the bed she'd made.

She just couldn't believe it. That she was fucking pregnant.

She wasn't on any birth control and hadn't been for years now but Larry had pulled out. Like he had done a million times before hand.

This wasn't suppose to happen.

Her body began to shake uncontrollably with sobs. She hated this. She wasn't even sure if she wanted a kid. Before Litchfield, yes she had thought about having Larry's child. But things were different now. She had no desire at the moment to reproduce. Especially after seeing Polly with Finn. Finn was cute and such. But he was a handful. A sticky, loud, handful.

She didn't need that in her life.

And what about Alex?

She couldn't possibly tell her that she had cheated on her with Larry and now was carrying his child. Especially, after everything she had done for her over the years. Alex had been her rock through that last year and half at Litchfield. She had been there for her like no one else ever had been. Alex had never judged her. She had only loved her.

"Fuck," whispered Piper harshly to herself. How was she going to tell her? She would kill her for sure or worse leave her. The brunette had strong feelings on kids and wanting a family. Piper, she knew had no desire to be a mom. Alex surely wouldn't want to raise the kid with Piper.

Hot tears continued to run down her cheeks into the nape of her neck. She didn't know what to do. She could always get rid of the baby and no one would have to know. But at the same time, she didn't know if she would be able to go through it.

An image of Pennsatucky suddenly filled her mind at these thoughts.

Piper automatically squeezed her eyes shut and violently shook her head from side to side. As if to erase the bible thumping meth-head from her mind. She hadn't allowed for herself to think about her in a while. Whenever she did, it only brought pain.

Her hands automatically clenched into fists as she thought back to that Christmas Eve night. She could still image Doggett standing there in that angel costume as clear as it was yesterday. Her brown eyes gleaming as snow fell around them. That twisted looked on her face as she held out that makeshift cross in front of her.

Threatening to kill her.

Piper tried to stop the memories from coming but once they stared they just kept on seeping out. Her stomach twisted with nausea. She was going to be sick. And this time she was. She could feel the bile rising up her throat as she bolted to the toilet bowl. A moment later her breakfast was coming up.

* * *

><p><em>August 2021<em>

"Hey, how did it go?" asked Nicky as she came out of the kitchen and appeared in the hallway as Alex closed the front door behind her.

Alex didn't say anything right away as she took her time putting her umbrella in the holder by the door and shook out her wet locks. Her green eyes were like ice as they glared at Nicky after a moment.

"That bad, uh?" asked Nicky as she continued to look on at Alex. She could tell her friend was pissed.

"No, it was _fucking_ peachy!" answered Alex, her voice dripping with sarcasm. "Me and Piper are back together and it's all because of you Nichols! So thank you! So so much!" Her green eyes pierced coldly into Nicky as she clasped her hands loudly together and mockingly made a thank-you gesture.

"You're pissed!" stated Nicky.

"Ya think!?" cried back Alex. Yeah, she was fucking pissed.

Nicky was surprisingly silent for once as she continued to look on at Alex. There had been only a few others times that she had been on the receiving end of Alex's raft like she was now. "Look. I didn't mean any harm. I just thought...I just thought maybe...if you guys talked and such...that maybe...just maybe..." her voice trailed off slightly as she tried to explain her original intentions to Alex.

"What? Maybe that we would magically get back together or something?" asked Alex with a huff. She had her arms crossed over her chest and weight resting on leg, the usual Vause stance as she waited to Nicky to continue. "Are you fucking kidding me?"

"Look I don't know. It seemed like a good idea at the time. You both have been hurt and I dunno, it's been years since you last spoken. I just thought..." Nicky's voice once again trailed off as she tried to find her words. She knew that despite the act that Alex and Piper put on. That they still loved each other. They couldn't help it. Loving each other was programmed into their brains like breathing. They did it naturally without thinking. She had seen it first hand while at Litchfield.

"Well, you were wrong," whispered Alex in a firm voice. She held Nicky's gaze for a second longer before turning on her heel and heading upstairs to the attic.

Nicky just let out a sigh, watching as Alex left before heading back into the kitchen where she was in the middle of cooking dinner.

* * *

><p><em>January 2017<em>

"What the fuck is wrong with you, Chapman?" asked Nicky, who was seated across from Piper. The two women were having lunch together. Every since leaving Litchfield, they had continued their friendship. Piper felt like she could tell Nicky anything. Things she didn't even tell Polly.

Piper's blue eyes fluttered up and on Nicky's face. "Nothing," she whispered trying to keep her voice and face blank of emotion. It had been a month since she found out she was pregnant and she had yet to tell anyone.

Nicky just continued to glare at Piper. She didn't believe her. Something was wrong, she just wasn't sure what. Piper had been out of it for sometime now. She wasn't sure if it was the usual depression that was normal after rejoining society or if it was something else all together bothering the blonde.

Nicky titled her head as she continued to study Piper who was now avoiding her eye all together and pushing her food around on her plate.

"Did you and Vause have a fight or something?" asked Nicky, trying to get to the root of the matter. "She said you didn't come last week to visit like you said you would."

"Me and Alex didn't get into a fight. We are good. I just didn't visit because I wasn't feeling well. She knows this. I told her I was sick," explained Piper slowly as she looked back up at Nicky. And it hadn't been an exact lie. She had been sick. Just not for the reasons she had told Alex she was.

"Okay. But that still doesn't explain why you are acting so weird."

"For crying out loud! I am not acting weird," cried out Piper in frustration. She didn't need the interrogation right now. "I am fine! There is nothing fucking wrong!"

Nicky pursed her lips slightly as she leaned back in her chair. She knew she had hit a nerve with Piper. There was something most defiantly wrong. She was just going at it from the wrong angle.

"So how is Polly's husband doing?" asked Nicky as she changed the subject and began to eat at her own food.

Piper could feel herself relax as she looked on at Nicky. She was glad that Nicky had dropped the interrogation act. "He is doing okay I guess...well okay for someone in his situation. He is home now, which is good. And he stared doing physical therapy twice a week."

Nicky nodded her head in understanding. Nicky wasn't the closest with Polly and her family. She had only met them a couple of times but knew all about their current situation. Pete had lost his right leg from the knee down in the accident. There had been too much nerve damage done to it.

"It's hard on Polly though," whispered Piper in a sadden voice as she thought about her best friend.

"I bet," offered Nicky through a mouthful of food.

Piper didn't say anything else as she once again turned her attention away from the other woman seated across from her and down onto her food. She could feel her stomach turning but she tried to ignore it. She had already gotten up twice to puke. She could possibly leave again without Nicky jumping down her throat.

So she remained seated for the remainder of the meal.

"Come on Chapman. Tell me what's wrong with you?" asked Nicky once again towards Piper as their plates were cleared and the waiter left. Her brown eyes were edged with concern. She really did care about Piper. "You barely ate anything."

Piper didn't answer right away. She knew she couldn't hide it much longer. The truth would have to come out eventually. She licked her lips nervously as she slowly looked up at Nicky. "Promise you won't tell, Alex."

Nicky was a little taken back by this. She looked at the blonde sceptically for a moment before nodding her head in agreement.

"Okay," she stated slowly. She wasn't comfortable keeping secrets from Alex, especially when it had to do with Piper. But at the same time. Piper clearly needed someone to turn too and Alex wasn't here at the moment.

Piper held Nicky's eye for a moment longer before shyly looking away. She couldn't look into those brown eyes as she told her the rest. She couldn't face seeing the judgement that was about to peer in them.

"I slept with Larry," she whispered quickly, like pulling off a bandage. Her heart was suddenly beating wildly against her chest in anticipation on what was to come next.

"And...I'm pregnant."

A look of shock appeared on the shorter woman's face. She didn't know what to say to this. This was not what she had been expecting to come out of Piper's mouth. Nicky for once in her life, was at a lost for words. Nicky who usually had a snarky remark for everything, didn't have anything to say.

"Well, you're fucked." she whispered after a deadly silence had fallen between them.

Piper clenched her jaw as she glared at Nicky. She already knew that she was fucked. She didn't need someone else telling her.

* * *

><p><em>August 2021<em>

"Mommy, I like Alex." stated Issy, as Piper put her to bed.

Piper didn't say anything as she smiled down at her daughter. All Issy could talk about was Alex. She didn't understand why her daughter had such an obsession over Alex. But again, so did she when she first met Alex.

It seemed like mother like daughter, Alex Vause was inevitable.

"Go to sleep now, pumpkin," whispered Piper as she draped the covers over Issy and pressed a kiss to her forehead.

"Can Alex come to my birthday party?" asked Issy as she looked up at Piper.

"We'll see," whispered Piper as she brushed back the hair off of Issy's face. She once again smiled at her daughter before leaning forward and kissing her forehead again. Issy's fourth birthday was coming up in two weeks and they were having a Princess and Pirates themed party.

"I love you."

"I love you too, mommy," murmured back Issy, who was suddenly overcome with sleep.

Piper stayed in the room a moment longer, watching as Issy's eyes grew heavy and began to close before leaving.

* * *

><p><em>February 2017<em>

Piper felt bloated and extremely nervous as she sat at the card table in the familiar Litchfield visitation room. Her fingers were laced together and resting on the table top. Her legs were shaking as she waited for Alex to come through the doors.

Piper saw her first as she came through the door from the search room. Alex's green eyes pierced around the room before falling on Piper, who was seated in the middle of the room. Her face broke out into a smile as she came towards her.

Piper smiled weakly back at Alex as she slowly pushed back the metal chair and rose to her feet.

"Hey, Baby," whispered Alex as she engulfed her arms around Piper's waist and pressed a quick kiss to her lips before nuzzling her face into her neck. She closed her eyes and allowed for Piper's scent to fill her nose. She had missed her. They stood like this for a moment longer before being told off by the guard on duty.

The two women immediatly broke a part and looked deeply into each other eyes before taking their seats across from each other at the table.

"Hi," whispered Piper shyly towards Alex.

Alex smiled back at Piper. She desperately wanted to reach out and take her hand but restrained herself. Her green eyes shined with devotion for the woman seated across from her. These visits were really the only thing she looked forward too now in Litchfield.

"I've missed you," whispered Alex in a tender voice. She hadn't seen Piper in almost two weeks now. "How are you feeling?" she asked as she took in the appearance of her girlfriend. Piper looked pale and sickly. She knew she had been suffering from the flu the pass weeks. That's why she hadn't come like she usually did. There were dark circles underneath Piper's blue eyes, she noted. She hadn't been sleeping, she thought. Alex didn't like this.

Piper ran a nervous hand through her blonde hair and tried to put a reassuring smile on her face. "I'm feeling better."

Alex slowly nodded her head at this but she wasn't convinced. Something was bothering the blonde, she could sense. She just wasn't sure what it was.

An awkward silence then fell between the two of them for a second as they continued to gaze at one another. Piper was struggling to keep her emotions in place. She wanted at least a little time with Alex to enjoy before she dropped her bomb of news on her. She smiled weakly at Alex before asking about what was new with her.

Alex raised an eyebrow sceptically at the blonde but still answered the question. There wasn't much to give though. Life was the same old thing at Litchfield. She still worked in the laundry room along with the meth-heads. Still attended AA meetings. She spend a good portion of her time in the library, reading whatever she could get her hands on. She played the occasional scrabble game with Big Boo and Yoga Jones. "There isn't much to report really," answered Alex slowly with a shrug of her shoulders. "Taystee left again. There has been a spotting of the Chicken again. This time, Big Boo saw it."

Piper couldn't help but laugh at the mention of the chicken. That chicken would forever haunt Litchfield it seemed. "Did Red go crazy over it again?" she asked as she recalled last time the chicken had been spotted and how the whole prison had turned upside down trying to find it. Including the Russian cook.

"Fuck yeah!" laughed Alex, her face breaking out into a smile.

Another silence soon fell over the lovers as their laughter died away. Piper's heart was pounding loudly against her chest. She knew she needed to tell Alex soon. She didn't know how much longer she could keep up this act. She knew she needed to be honest. Alex deserved that much from her. Piper bit down on her lower lip as she casted her eyes away from Alex and out the window.

It was raining again.

Alex let out a sigh as she continued to watch Piper. Something was defiantly up. "If there is something you want to tell me...then just say it Pipes," she whispered in a soft voice.

Piper immediatly turned her attention back onto Alex at this. Her blue eyes widen slightly like they did when she was guilty about something. Their eyes locked for a second before Piper looked away again.

"I..."began to explained Piper but her voice trailed off. She didn't know how to start. "I...I slept with Larry." Her voice came out rushed and strained as she looked back up at Alex. There were tears in her eyes as she confessed this. She had never meant to hurt Alex ,again.

Alex didn't say anything as she stared back at Piper. Her face was a mix of shock and anger. Her green eyes pierced into Piper like darts as she tried to process this new bit of information.

A deadly silence followed as they both seemed to be at a lost for words. Alex continued to study Piper for a second before it dawn on her.

"You're pregnant. Aren't you?"

"I'm _so_ sorry Alex," cried out Piper, her voice breaking. "I never meant for this to happen...I...just..."

"When?" asked Alex, cutting off Piper. Her eyes were like ice as they looked on at Piper. Her heart was breaking at the moment but she didn't let it show. Her face was a mask of coldness as she waited for Piper to answer.

"Um...the night Pete, Polly's husband was in the accident." Piper nervously bit down on her bottom lip. She hated the look that was reflecting back at her on Alex's face.

"That was in November," stated Alex as she slowly put the pieces together.

Piper just nodded her head in reply to this.

"So what, that makes you what almost two months pregnant?"

"14 weeks," whispered Piper in a small voice.

Alex just glared at Piper for a second before looking abruptly away. She could feel the tears stinging the back of her eyes, threatening to fall. She couldn't believe that this was happening again. That Piper was once again, breaking her fucking heart.

"Fuck!" she swore loudly, causing the table near by to look in their direction but she didn't care. "Fuck!" Alex didn't dare to look in Piper's direction as she pushed her glasses on top of her head and quickly brushed away the tears that had began to fall.

Another moment of silence passed before Alex turned her attention back onto Piper.

"I'm going to assume that you're keeping it, right?"

Piper was taken back by this. She opened and closed her mouth to reply but no words came out. She was suddenly overcome with anger. How dare Alex ask a question like that to her. Piper was all about pro-choice and such. But she still couldn't help but feel assaulted by Alex's question.

"I haven't given it much thought but...I guess I am...going to keep it," she replied honestly towards Alex after a moment.

Alex pursed her lips as she looked on at Piper. She knew that Piper would be. And a small part didn't blame her. Piper deserved to be a mother if she wanted too. But at the same time, she had been hoping that Piper was going to be giving it up.

"Are you going to marry Larry?" asked Alex, afraid to hear the answer.

Piper was once again taken back by Alex's question. She had told Larry about the baby a week ago now but they hadn't discussed marriage or anything. He was just as shocked as she was that she was pregnant. "I don't know," she murmured in a quiet voice. Both her and Larry were seeing someone at the moment. They were both still trying to wrap their heads around this news. The future hadn't been discussed yet.

"Well, I guess I should congratulate you then," spoke Alex, as she sat up straight in her seat, "This is what you always wanted, right? To have Larry's kid."

Alex's words were like needles poking her heart. "Alex," began Piper, "That's not fair. I didn't want this..." Tears streamed down her face as she pleaded with Alex to believe her. "It was a stupid mistake that I wish I could take fucking back. I didn't want this. I want you!" Her voice broke as she buried her face into her hands. "I love _you_! Not Larry!" she cried as she lifted her head and looked back at Alex.

"I love you!"

Alex just glared at Piper. Her face was once again a mask of stone. "If you really loved me, you wouldn't have slept with your fucking ex-fiancé."

"Alex!"

"Fuck no, Pipes! I'm done! I am not going to be this kid's second mommy, if that is what you are thinking. I am tired of being your fucking punching bag. I'm fucking done!" She stated again as she pushed back her chair and suddenly rose to her feet.

"Alex!" cried out Piper again towards her.

Alex didn't look back as she walked away from the table and out of the visitation room. Tears blurred her vision but she didn't allow them to fall until the door closed behind her. She couldn't believe that this was fucking happening all over again to her. That once again Piper was breaking her heart.

"Fuck!" cursed Alex as she ran her hands through her black locks and kicked the wall with her work boots.

* * *

><p>Thanks for reading and please review!<p>

Julie


	6. Chapter 5

Do not own Orange Is the New Black or any of the characters.

Thanks everyone for all the reviews and follows! :) I'm glad people are still with me even though Vauseman isn't...at least at the moment. Not sure about the faith of our girls just yet.

Enjoy!

* * *

><p><span><strong>Rainstorms<strong>

_**Chapter 5**_

_Baby to Think About_

_February 2017_

Piper could hear someone knocking at her front door but she ignored it. She curled herself further up into a ball and pulled the covers over her head. It had been a week since she had told Alex and hadn't left the comforts of her bed since.

The moment she had got back home she had turned off her phone and shut herself off to the world. Her heart was broken and she had only herself to blame for it. It was her own damn fault she was in the position she was in now.

She heard her house phone go off but she made no move to get up. She just wanted everyone to leave her fucking alone. She just wanted to isolate herself from the world.

A few moments passed before the answering machine kicked in. Whoever, had just called didn't leave a message.

She squeezed her eyes shut and tried to go back to sleep but was once again interrupted by a pounding on her door. She could hear someone call slightly but she couldn't pick up who it was. And she really didn't fucking care. She just hoped whoever it was would get the message that she wasn't home.

"Fuck, Chapman!" cried Nicky as she pounded loudly on the door. "Open up!"

"Maybe we should leave," squeaked Lorna towards her girlfriend. Piper clearly wanted to be left alone.

"No, Lorna. This has been going on for a fucking week," Nicky's dark eyes looked over at her girlfriend before turning back to the door. "We are not leaving until Chapman OPENS THE FUCKING DOOR!" She banged loudly against it. She would stay here until Piper opened up. She couldn't stay in her apartment for ever. She would need to get up soon.

"CHAPMAN!" cried the blonde again as she once again pounded against the surface of the door.

* * *

><p><em>August 2021<em>

"Wait, what? You saw supercunt?" asked a very pregnant Polly towards Piper. The two friends were seated in the kitchen of Polly's house.

"Yeah," whispered Piper as she burned her tongue on her hot cup of tea. She placed it immediatly down onto the surface of the table before continuing on with her story. "I thought she wanted to see me...or so Nicky said but it turned out...it was just a fucking set up."

Polly rubbed her beach ball of stomach as she continued to look at Piper. They hadn't talked about Alex in ages it seemed. "What, did Nicky think you guys would get back together or something?" Polly raised an eyebrow as she reached suddenly for a cookie on the plate seated between her and Piper. The kids, Issy and Polly's two sons, Finn and Sebastian where playing in the living room.

"Who knows," groaned Piper as she rubbed her face before reaching for her tea again. She had no idea what Nicky was thinking. Alex clearly didn't want to have anything to do with her and she didn't blame her. But at the same time, Piper wasn't going to mope about it. She knew that she still cared about Alex. She always would. But four years had passed and she had a life outside of Alex. She had a daughter who was her world now.

"But the worse part is, that Issy met her," continued on Piper. Her voice was low as she leaned forward into her seat and checked that there were no little ones around. "And now she won't stop talking about her."

Polly just nodded her head slowly in understanding as she eat her cookie. Issy got attached to people quickly. That's why Piper had never really dated anyone since her divorce. Or when she did, they never met her daughter.

"Someone or something else will come along and get her attention," answered Polly, "Finn went through a faze like that when he was her age. He was obsessed with his babysitter, Ellen. All he talked about was her. I think it was his first real crush. It was kinda cute, actually. But he quickly forgot about her after we moved out of the city. I'm sure Issy will forget all about supercunt in the next few days. It's not like you are going to see her again...right?"

"I hope so," whispered Piper as placed down her tea cup and reached for a cookie. She really did hope that Polly was right and that Issy would forget about Alex. It wasn't that Alex was a bad person. It was just that she knew Alex wouldn't want anything to do with the kid. And she didn't want her daughter to get burn in the process of that.

The two old friends continued to drink their teas in silence, listening to the giggles and chatter coming from the next room.

* * *

><p><em>March 2017<em>

"Hey," spoke Alex as she took the seat opposite of Nicky in the visitation room.

"Hey," greeted back Nicky as her brown eyes locked with Alex's green ones. "How've you been?" She asked with genuine concern. She was worried about Alex. It had been a month since Piper had broken the news she was pregnant and she didn't look any better then she had a week after that visit.

Alex just shrugged her shoulders and leaned back in her seat like she was bored already of the conversation. Nicky, she knew wanted to talk about Piper. But she wasn't in the mood. She never wanted to hear that name again in her life. Just the association of it brought a pain to her heart. "I've been okay..." she answered dryly as she looked away from Nicky and out one of the windows which looked out onto the gloomy prison yard. It was raining lightly outside. Spring was soon, she thought as she looked back onto Nicky.

Alex had once looked forward to these weekly visits with Nicky, who she considered her best friend. But they only now brought her pain. Nicky she knew still talked and saw Piper on a regular basis which not only irritated her. Nicky was suppose to be her friend. She was suppose to be on her side, she thought. She was the one who was not only locked up in this hell hold but had been the one to get cheated on.

Also just seeing Nicky made her realize how alone she was in Litchfield now. She had nothing really. There were very few people within her social circle now. Being in prison had kinda turned her into a introvert in away. She spent a good portion of her time now, reading.

"How are things with you and Morello?" asked Alex as she crossed her arms and attempted to make small talk. It pained her how uncomfortable it felt to sit across from Nicky like this. Conversation which once had been so easy between them was now forced and awkward.

"Good, good. Things are good," answered Nicky, a smile appearing on her face, "We just bought that house I was telling you about last week. It's in Brooklyn. Brown Stone and shit. Real nice."

Alex forced a smile on her face at this. "Sounds amazing!" She really wanted to be happy for Nicky and Lorna. They had come so far it seemed since when she had first met them years ago. Lorna, she bet would never cheat on Nicky with Christopher. She pursed her lips as another stab of pain filled her heart. It had been a month since Piper had torn her heart out but the pain was still fresh and new. Last time she had turned to drugs to numb the pain. She didn't dare to turn down that dark road again. Especially since Red had taken her under her wing as one of her girls. The Russian cook would surely disown her, if she did. She couldn't a forward to lose her too.

"Yeah, Lorna is really happy about it. She is already talking about renovating and colour schemes and shit," Nicky couldn't help but smile at this. She had never expected for life outside of Litchfield to be this good to her. But it was. She had a girl that loved her and now a house to call her own. And she had done it all without her mother's help. Nicky didn't make a lot of money at the floral shop she worked now, along with Lorna but with saving and with the money that her grandmother had left her in her will last summer. It had been enough.

"Let me guess, pinks and yellows!" teased Alex, remembering back to Lorna's campaign buttons.

"Oh god," cried Nicky rolling her eyes, "I'm going to be living in a fucking cupcake or something!"

Alex couldn't help but laugh along with Nicky at this. It felt good to laugh, she thought. It seemed like so long ago she allowed for her self to do so. Her face always seemed to be made up of harsh lines and edges. If her mother was still alive to see her now, she would have told her to stop scowling.

The two friends continued to talk and chat for the rest of the visitation hours.

"Take care of yourself, Vause," whispered Nicky into Alex's ear as they hugged goodbye. She knew how difficult if was for Alex to be stuck in Litchfield while everyone else was living their lives. Especially now with Piper pregnant.

"I'm trying," whispered back Alex as she pulled away and looked into Nicky's eye. And she really was trying. It was just so damn hard sometimes. A sad smile appeared on her face before she said goodbye to the other woman and began to head out of the room along with her fellow inmates.

* * *

><p><em>August 2021<em>

Alex rubbed the back of her neck as she closed the front door behind her and let out a tired sigh. She had just worked a double at the hotel and she was exhausted. It was the early hours of the morning as she quietly placed her black rucksack down on the floor and proceed to take off her white tennis shoes. She was still dressed in her maid uniform.

She left her shoes and rucksack by the door as she slowly crept along the hallway towards the kitchen. She was starving and knew she wouldn't be able to go to sleep yet. It was six in the morning but she was use to being up at this time. She was still on prison time. Her body still wasn't adjusted it seemed to civilian life.

Alex couldn't help but yawn as she flicked on the kitchen lights and walked towards the fridge. She then slowly proceeded to pull out a carton of milk. Every muscle in her back seemed to protest as she straightened it suddenly. She wasn't as young as she use to be. She had just had her forty fourth birthday last month. She really needed to start taking up yoga again, she thought as she began to open one of the cupboards looking for the cereal. Alex had never been one for working out or fitness for that matter. But within the last half or so of her sentence she had began to take Yoga Jones's Wednesday afternoon yoga classes. It had mostly been out of boredom and just having something to do but it had quickly grew on her. She found it helped trigger her anger and feelings in a positive way.

After fixing herself a bowl of cereal, Alex flicked off the lights and proceeded into the living room.

It was there she took a seat on the plush floral couch and flicked on the TV in the corner of the room. She hardly paid attention to the morning talk show that was currently playing on the TV as she ate slowly at her cereal. Her mind seemed to be buzzing with a million different thoughts. It had been two days since she had seen Piper but once again the blonde was on her mind.

She tried to cut that part of her self off and it worked for the most part. But every now and then when she was too exhaust to care, she would slip into those thoughts and feelings. Like now.

Alex let out a deep breathe as she placed the some what empty bowl onto the coffee table and rose to her feet. She knew she should clear her bowl but that could wait. Curiosity was getting the better of her as suddenly rose to her feet and enclosed the distance between the couch and fireplace. She had made an effort not to look at the photographs that lined the mantel when she had first arrived at Nicky's house.

But once again, curiosity was getting the better of her. Maybe it was because her lack of sleep or something else but she couldn't stop her green eyes from studying the framed photographs. There were about twenty or so. There were some of Lorna and Nicky but the real star was a little blonde girl from being just a tiny newborn to her current age.

Any stranger that came into the house would think that she was Nicky's and Lorna's. But in reality, they were just proud Godparents.

"She's a cute kid, isn't she?"

Alex jumped slightly at this. She immediatly straightened her back and turned to see Lorna staring back at her. Her green eyes locked on the smaller woman's brown eyes. She didn't say anything in reply to her question. She blushed slightly at being caught, looking.

Lorna smiled a kind smile at Alex before asking if she wanted a coffee, she was going to be putting the machine on. "Nicky hates when there is not a fresh pot made when she wakes up," explained Lorna in her normal squeaky voice.

Alex couldn't help but smile slightly at this. Nicky was a pain in the ass when she didn't have her coffee first thing in the morning. "I'm okay," she murmured, "I'm probably going to fall asleep any minute anyways."

Lorna just smiled again and before moving into the kitchen.

Alex waited until Lorna was out of the room before turning to look back at the photographs one last time. There was one in particular that caught her eye. It was one of both Issy and Piper together. Issy looked to be either about one or so, figured Alex. Piper looked as beautiful as she always did, she couldn't help but admit. Piper was grinning broadly into the camera as she held Issy on her hip. Issy was smiling too, her little teeth showing. The tot had an ice-cream cone in her hand. Half of it was smeared across her face where the other was melting and running down her chubby arm. Alex couldn't help but think about how happy Piper looked. The last time she had seen her look like that was back when they had first been going out. There had been moments in Litchfield when Piper had come close to looking like that but never quite. There was always a touch of sadness in her eyes.

Alex pushed her glasses off of her face and rubbed her eyes before putting the photograph back. She was suddenly very exhausted not only physically but emotionally. She then headed out of the living room. She grabbed her rucksack before heading up the stairs and towards the attic.

She was hoping that sleep would come quickly and for it to be dreamless.

* * *

><p><em>March 2017<em>

Piper let out a sigh as she turned to her side and examined her naked body in the full length mirror. She was eighteen weeks pregnant and felt like a whale. She was in her second trimester and you could defiantly tell now that there was a baby there.

She placed her hands automatically on her round stomach and smiled as she felt the baby move. The baby had just started to move a couple of days ago. At first it had completely weirded her out but she was now slowly getting use to it. It just made this ten times more real to her.

She was having a baby.

Her smiled widened as she turned these words in her head. She was going to be a mommy. They had yet to find out the sex of the baby. Larry had told her it was up to her if she wanted to know the sex or not. She had chosen no. She wanted it to be a surprise.

It had taken her some time but she was looking forward to this. After Nicky had charged into her apartment and told her to get out of bed. Something had changed within Piper. It had made her realize she didn't just have herself to think about anymore. Soon this little being would depend on her for everything. She couldn't be the selfish Piper Chapman anymore. She needed to start focusing on someone who wasn't herself.

And that was what she did. After that day, Piper had called up Larry and told him they needed to talk. Really talk about the future and how they were going to raise this child. And so, they had gotten married. It had been nothing big or fancy. Just a simple ceremony and reception at Piper's parents' house with only close friends and family.

She had kept her own name though, despite the disapproval of her mother.

Larry had ended things with his girlfriend and had moved into Piper's apartment. She had to admit it was weird to be living together again but it was slowly starting to feel normal in away.

She still missed Alex everyday and second but she tried not to let it affect her too much. Like Nicky said, she needed to move on with her life.

She had a baby to think about.

* * *

><p>Okay, so I might be M.I.A for the next few weeks. I am trying to finish a thesis and get my BFA at the moment. But who knows, I can never stay away for too long! Lol<p>

Anyways, thanks for reading and if you feel like making my day, leave a review!

Julie


	7. Chapter 6

Do not own Orange Is the New Black or any of the characters.

Thanks again to everyone for their kind words on the last chapter. It really does mean a lot. That's probably why I am posting this chapter just a mere three days after I said I would be M.I.A. I just can't get away, it seems. lol

Anyways, here is another chapter to enjoy. It's a long one.

* * *

><p><span><strong>Rainstorms<strong>

_**Chapter 6**_

_Storms and Cookies_

_September 2017- Labour Day_

"Damn Chapman!" whistled Nicky as Piper came out onto the deck, "You look good!"

"Oh fuck off," cried back Piper as she rolled her eyes at Nicky before putting on her sunglasses and lowering herself into a chair. She knew that Nicky was just taunting her. She did not look good at all. She was nine months pregnant and huge.

"I'm serious," spoke Nicky, a wide grin playing on her face, "Pregnancy agrees with you. Your tits are bigger and you finally have an ass."

Piper just flipped Nicky the finger before she ran her hands self-consciously over her bump. The baby was moving, again. She was due any day now and was more than ready to get this kid out of her.

Nicky just laughed before leaning back in her own deck chair and chugged the remainder her beer. They were up in the Hamptons at Polly's time share. Polly and Pete had left earlier that morning with Finn, who had school the next day. Larry, who hadn't come up with them was back in the city finishing an article for his column on an online magazine. It was just Nicky, Lorna and Piper left.

They were soaking in the last rays of summer before heading back into the city the next morning.

"What are you two laughing about?" asked Lorna as she appeared on the deck and looked between Piper and Nicky.

"Piper's ass," chuckled Nicky as she flipped up her sunglasses and grinned sheepishly at her girlfriend.

"I should've know," squeaked Lorna as she rolled her eyes and came over to where Nicky was seated. Nicky immediatly pulled her down onto her lap and kissed her cheek.

A comforting silence then fell over them as they all watched as the waves cashed into the sand of the beach.

"A nasty storm is suppose to be comin'," squeaked Lorna as she gestured to the dark clouds off in the distance.

"Nah, blue skies Lorna," explained Nicky pointing to the bright sun and blue skies over their heads. "It's not going to rain." And she wouldn't allow it. This was the last of the summer and she wasn't going to be spending it inside.

Lorna just frowned at her girlfriend before looking over at Piper, who looked to be half asleep. This was normal for the blonde now. Piper always managed to fall asleep where ever she was.

"She's out again," spoke Lorna with a smile over to Nicky.

Nicky just chuckled at this before tightening her on Lorna waist. The couple shared a long kiss before pulling away.

"Let's go for a walk," suggested Lorna as she suddenly rose to her feet and pulled Nicky up with her.

"Should we tell momma-to- be?" asked Nicky as she gestured to Piper.

"Aww, but she looks so peaceful," answered Lorna, once again looking down at the blonde.

"We will leave her a note then," suggested Nicky as she planted a kiss on the side of Lorna's face before heading back into the house to get a piece of paper.

* * *

><p><em>August 2021<em>

"Are you sure you're okay with watching her?" asked Piper for the seventh time towards Nicky.

"Yes, Chapman. It's fine!" Nicky smirked at Piper. She had told her it was fine to bring Issy over when she had first called an hour ago. Larry was suppose to take her but he had got caught up at work and Piper had a business meeting to attend.

"What about Alex?" asked Piper as she stood in the threshold of the house. She held a sleeping Issy in her arms. The almost four year old had fallen asleep on the taxi ride over. "I don't want to cause a problem or anything..."

"You're not. Alex is at work at the moment," stated Nicky, reassuring the blonde. "Plus, Issy is always welcome here. You know that."

Piper slowly nodded her head before adjusting the weight of Issy against her hip. She knew that Issy was always welcomed at Nicky and Lorna's. However, she knew that Alex was living here now and didn't want to step on anyone's toes. She had made sure over the last couple of months that Alex had been living here that she didn't drop Issy off when she was here. But she was in a bind now. She really needed to make her meeting.

"Here," gestured Nicky as she took Issy's backpack from Piper. She placed the small purple backpack down on the floor beside the door before taking Issy from Piper. "Holy shit. What do you feed this kid? I swear she gets heavier each time I see her!" Issy, who was still sleeping was like a sack of potatoes in Nicky's arms.

Piper just ignored this comment before going on to tell Nicky how she shouldn't be any longer than an hour or two.

"Chapman, it's fine! Go. Go. You're taxi is waiting," explained Nicky with a wave of hand, indicating to the blonde that she didn't care how long she would be. Issy would still be here when she got back. "GO!" she smirked as Piper still hovered in the doorway.

"Ok. Ok. I'm leaving!" cried Piper as she leaned quickly forward and pressed a kiss to Issy's head. "And Nicky?"

"What?"

"Thank you!" and with that Piper turned on her heel and ran down the steps of the front porch and towards the taxi which was parked outside the house, waiting.

Nicky just laughed with amusement at she watched as Piper ran through the rain in her heels and got into the taxi. She stood there for a moment longer as the taxi pulled away before closing the front door.

* * *

><p><em>September 2017- Labour Day<em>

Piper a woke abruptly to the sound of thunder in the distance. She opened her eyes in a daze as she took in her surroundings. She licked her lips as she pushed her sunglasses on top of her head and tried to sit up in the chair.

The usually crowded beach was empty now. The sun was gone and replaced with a dark loaming cloud overhead. A storm was a brewing, thought Piper to herself. She wondered where Nicky and Lorna were? This was not the first time she had woken up along on the deck, like she was now.

Piper let out a sigh before she slowly began to rise to her feet. It was a little harder now with her massive stomach but she managed.

Once on her feet, Piper shuffled her way back into the house. The house was dark and eerie quiet as she slid closed the sliding glass door behind her and stepped into the kitchen.

"Hello?" she called out.

There was no answer except for the quiet whisper of her own voice echoing slightly off the walls back to her.

Her blue eyes scanned around the kitchen before she noticed a note left on the kitchen island. It was written in Nicky's looped penmanship. _Gone for a walk._ Piper rubbed the side of her face before placing her sunglasses on top of the note.

Just then she felt a pain in her stomach. She whimpered slightly as her hands clenched immediatly at her stomach. The pain only lasted for a second or two. It was gone as quickly as it arrived. Piper felt nervous butterflies suddenly come over her but she tried not to think about it too much. It was just gas or something, she thought. Nothing to worry about.

She stood there rubbing her swollen stomach before processing further into the house. She was going to have a bath while everyone was out.

She flicked on the bathroom light before making her way towards the bath. Leaning forward she turned on the faucet and the room immediatly filled with the sound of running water. She groaned slightly as she straightened her back and processed to strip out of the maternity bikini and wrap she was wearing. She waited for the tub to fill a little more with water before carefully lowering herself in.

She closed her eyes immediatly as she sank into the hot water of the bath. She lay like this for a second, listening to the sounds of the water running before she felt another ache of pain in her stomach. Her toes curled as she hands clenched the sides of the tub. This pained lasted a little longer than the first one had been.

Piper found that her heart was suddenly racing as she sat up in the tub and the pain faded quickly away. She hoped that these sudden cramps weren't what she thought they were. This was not a good time for the baby to come.

Piper looked down at her stomach and placed a tender hand on the curve of it. "Don't come now," she whispered to the little unknown person inside of her. As if understanding what she had just said, the baby kicked suddenly against the palm of Piper's hand.

She couldn't help but smile at this. She would never get tired of feeling the baby move. "I want to meet you, I do," she continued to whisper to her belly, "It's just...we aren't home at the moment and I don't need you being born in the middle of storm." She felt the baby move again in response to this. "So, if you could just wait until...maybe tomorrow or the next day. That would be great." She knew that the baby would be coming any day now. Her stomach had dropped and the baby was sitting low like it should be at this point of her pregnancy.

She rubbed her belly one more time before leaning forward as best as she could and turned off the water. She then sat back against the tub and allowed for the warm water to wash over her.

* * *

><p><em>August 2021<em>

Alex couldn't help but frown slightly in puzzlement as she came into the house. The whole house was vibrating as music blared loudly from the kitchen. This wasn't that unusual. Nicky was known for rocking out when she cooked sometimes.

But Alex still couldn't help being puzzled. This wasn't Nicky's usual music or Lorna's for that matter, thought Alex to herself as she kicked off the boots she was wearing and placed her rucksack down before proceeding towards the kitchen to see what was going on.

As she approached the kitchen the loud beat of the music filled her ears. She couldn't help but smirk as she leaned against the doorframe of the kitchen and took in the scene before her. Nicky was lip syncing along with the song; using the wooden spoon in her hand as a microphone while Lorna danced. The shorter woman had her back turned towards Alex, so she could not see who she was dancing with.

It wasn't until Lorna took Issy by the hands and spun her around the room that Alex noticed the little girl. Her laughter rang off the walls and filled Alex's ears. It was soft and gentle like only the laugher of a child's could be.

The smile faded from Alex's face as she looked over her shoulder as if expecting to see a certain blonde walking towards her. But she was alone.

The hallway was empty.

She tore her attention back onto the scene in the kitchen. The song had just ended and a new one was playing now. It was a song that Alex's didn't recognize. She continued to stand there for a second longer watching the interactions between Issy and her Godparents. They seemed like a family, she couldn't help but note.

Nicky had now abandoned her spoon and was pretending to play the guitar. Issy was mimicking her. They were both rock stars as they continued to beat their heads along with the music. Lorna now had the spoon in her hand and was the lead singer in this pretend band.

Alex couldn't help but feel a mix of emotions at seeing them all together. This little girl's existence was the reason why her life had been torn to pieces. She was suppose to hate her. But how could she hate on this little angel that seemed to bring so much joy to everyone else? She wanted to scream out in frustration. She didn't want any of this. She had never wanted to see or meet Piper's daughter. Nicky had brought it up once or twice at visits but Alex had made it clear, she didn't want to know for this exact reason. She would fall in love with her. Just like she had fallen in love with her mother.

Chapman women just had a power over her that no one else had.

Alex sighed before taking a step away from the door frame. She needed to get away for a bit. However, it wasn't going to be that easy for her. Issy saw Alex from the across the room.

Her face lit up with joy! Her chubby cheeks were pushed up as a grin spread across her face.

"ALEX!" Issy cried before running across the kitchen and towards her.

Alex immediatly found herself taking a small step back before she felt Issy's arms wrap powerfully around her legs. She found herself holding her breath as she looked down at the little face peering back at her.

Issy's brown eyes were bright as they locked on Alex's green ones.

"Hi," she giggled up towards her.

* * *

><p><em>September 2017- Labour Day<em>

"CHAPMAN! WHERE YOU AT?" called out Nicky in a booming voice as she entered the house.

"I'm in the bath," called back Piper a second later.

"I bet you any money, she is fucking stuck in there," joked Nicky towards Lorna. It wouldn't be the first time that Piper had taken a bath and then not able to get herself back up.

"Let's go check on her," replied Lorna with a smile before taking Nicky's hand and leading her towards the bathroom. The door was slightly a jarred as the two women approached the door.

"We're coming in!" warned Nicky before pushing open the door. She couldn't help but snigger slightly at the scene before her. Piper had her arms dangling over the sides of the tub. Her mountain of a stomach could be seen peaking out.

Piper just glared at her. "Well are you just going to fucking stand there or help a pregnant woman out?"

"Help you out," replied Lorna as she shook her head slightly at Nicky before processing into the bathroom.

"Thank you!" spoke Piper as Lorna took her hand and helped her out of the tub. Piper was glad she wasn't modest about her body. For that would be a real issue at this moment as she stood naked, dripping wet in front of her two friends.

"Yeah, yeah, you have a hot body! Chapman...we get it!" teased Nicky towards Piper before handing her a towel from behind the door. "Now cover it!"

Piper just rolled her eyes at Nicky as she took the towel and wrapped it around her body as best as she could. Her face then suddenly scrunched up as a wave of pain came over her. She bit down on her lower lip as the towel slipped through her fingers and her hands went to her stomach.

It lasted for a moment before fading away.

"What the fuck?" asked Nicky as she glared at Piper in worry. "What was that?"

Piper didn't answer right away. She had been having these cramps on and off since getting into the bath. She thought she might be in labour but she wasn't so sure.

"Are you in labour?" asked Lorna as her hands went to her mouth. Her brown eyes widening in fear.

Piper just rubbed her stomach as she shrugged her shoulders and murmured that she might be.

"How long have you been contracting for?" asked Nicky as she once again reached for the towel lying at Piper's feet and wrapped it around her shoulders.

"I dunno, an hour or so," replied Piper. "But it could just be gas or something. I did have taco's for lunch..." Her face broke out into a nervous smile as she looked on at Nicky. She could see the wheels cranking in her head. This was not a good time to be giving birth. The nearest hospital was about two hours away by car.

"Let's fucking hope it's just gas," murmured Nicky as she continued to gawk at Piper before heading out of the bathroom.

Lorna met Piper's eye and smiled warmly at her before placing a gentle hand on her stomach before leaving the room. Piper followed close behind them.

She waddled into her room and proceeded to dry off and get dressed. Her heart pounded loudly against her chest as she moved around the room. She was nervous that the baby was going to come. She wanted it to come out but not like this. She was suppose to be giving birth in a clean hospital bed, surrounded by experienced nurses and doctors. Just then the shutters of the house rattled loudly as the wind blew hard and a crack of thunder could be heard in the distance. Piper, who was now wearing a oversized t-shirt which was Larry's and a pair of yoga pants, moved slowly towards the window. She stared out at the darkness that had become the sky. She stood there for a moment longer, listening to the rain fall before heading out of the room. She headed into the living room where Nicky and Lorna were. They had the TV on and where watching the weather station. They were reporting that this was to be one of the heaviest storms of the summer. People were being warned to stay off the roads.

"Well, Chapman," spoke Nicky as she looked over at Piper who had lowered herself into a chair. "You better keep those vaginal walls closed until we get back to the city."

Piper opened her mouth to say something but before she could she was overcome with pain again. This time it was more intense and longer than the other ones had been. "Fuck..." she moaned as she arched her back and breathed heavily through her nose. Her fingers digging into the arms of the chair.

It was defiantly not gas.

"That ain't no gas you're suffering from," observed Nicky as she turned off the TV and stood up. "How far along are these pains?" she asked. She didn't really no what she was suppose to be doing but it sounded like the right thing to ask.

Piper just frowned as she tried to think. "About an half an hour or so." She wasn't really sure. She hadn't been keeping track. She rubbed the side of her face as she looked down at her stomach. She had read every book about pregnancy and giving birth it seemed but at this moment, none of that information was coming to her.

"Okay..." answered Nicky as if she knew what that meant. She was just as lost about this as Piper was.

* * *

><p><em>August 2021<em>

"I'll only be five minutes," Piper told the taxi driver before pushing open the door and sliding out of the car as a gracefully as she could. She was glad it had finally stopped raining as she walked up the small walkway and up the stairs of Nicky's house. She immediatly pressed the doorbell twice.

She was in a bit of a rush.

Not only did the taxi driver have the meter running but she needed to get over to Queens to drop off Issy at Larry's parents' house. It was Larry's mother's birthday and she surely wouldn't hear the end of it if she was late dropping Issy off.

Piper tapped her foot impatiently as she heard footsteps approach on the other side. She had told Nicky she was on her way. It was always a little tough to get the little girl to leave. She loved it there at her Auntie Nicky's and Auntie Lorna's. Piper always called a head of time so that Nicky could prepare Issy to leave.

"Finally... Oh..." Piper's voice trailed off as her eyes locked on Alex's. She hadn't been expecting for her to answer the door. She had thought it would be either Nicky or Lorna.

Defiantly not Alex.

Their eyes stayed locked for a second. This was the first time they were seeing each other since that Sunday afternoon at Starbucks. Almost a week ago now.

Alex licked her lips slightly before tearing her eyes away from Piper and glancing over her shoulder briefly. She hoped that Nicky or Lorna would show up soon. She had been in the living room, reading when the doorbell had rung. She didn't know that Piper was coming by.

"I don't know where everyone is," she spoke after a moment had passed and she pushed opened the door, gesturing for Piper to come inside.

Piper seemed to be at a lost of words as she just stood there for a second before her brain kicked into gear and her legs moved. She side-stepped Alex as she proceeded into the house. She was suddenly very nervous at being in the same space as the brunette. She tucked her blonde hair behind her ears as she casted a sideways glance at Alex, who was studying a spot on the wall.

Both women were nervous at this sudden run in. Neither wanted to be here at that moment.

An awkward silence fell over them for a moment before Issy came down the stairs holding Lorna's hand. "We had a little accident," explained Lorna as she noticed that Piper was here. "But we are okay now. Right?" she asked as she looked down at Issy and smiled.

"Right!" confirmed Issy in her little serious voice as she nodded her head. She then turned her attention onto Piper as she jumped off the last step, "Hi Mommy!"

"Hi Sweetie!" answered back Piper, her face automatically breaking out into a smile.

"Mommy, Alex is here," explained Issy excitably to Piper as if she could not see Alex standing a mere feet away.

"I know," whispered Piper as she knelt down to Issy as best as she could in the tight pencil skirt she was wearing. She didn't dare to look over at Alex. She continued to smile at her daughter, reaching out and tucking a stray piece of blonde hair off of her face. "Are you ready to go?" She was afraid to hear the answer. Issy was never ready to leave.

"Mommy we made chocolate chip cookies...come and have some," Issy immediatly took Piper's hand and tugged on it. She wanted Piper to come into the kitchen.

"Baby, we can take them to go...but remember we can't stay. It's Bubbe's birthday and she would be awfully upset if she didn't get to see you today. " Piper was still kneeling down so she could look Issy in the eye.

"But I don't want to go to Bubbe's." whined Issy. "I want to stay here." The little girl's brow fuzzed together as she pouted her lower lip.

"I know, I know..." murmured Piper gently to her daughter, "But we wouldn't want to hurt Bubbe's feelings. Now would we?" Her voice was firm but clear.

Just then Nicky came down the hallway. She held Issy's backpack and a small bag full of cookies in her hand. Everyone turned to look at her for a second. There was a slight smirk on her face as she locked eyes with Alex, who was looking very uncomfortable at the moment. She had been avoiding Issy all day. Nicky and Lorna had tried to keep the little girl occupied as best as they could.

Alex just glared at Nicky before glancing down at Issy. She couldn't help but be reminded of Piper and her temper. The little girl had her arms crossed over her chest and stomp her little foot at being told once again she couldn't stay.

"NO!" she screamed towards Piper.

Piper just sighed slightly before once again attempting to talk to her daughter. "Isabelle!" she warned in a firm voice. "You heard me. We can't stay."

"NO!" cried out Issy again, stomping her foot once again in protest.

"Isabelle Nicole! We are leaving!" Piper had yet to raise her voice at her daughter but she close to doing so. She hated how stubborn her daughter could be at times.

"NO!" cried out Issy again before running away from Piper and going to hid behind Alex. The little girl once again clung to Alex's legs. "Alex will let me stay. wight?" she asked her brown eyes staring intensely up at Alex.

Alex just stood there dumbfound as she looked down at Issy before looking over at Piper who was now standing up. The blonde was just as taken back by this as she was.

Piper closed her eyes and let out a sigh. This was not how this was suppose to go.

Piper then took the backpack and bag of cookies from Nicky before turning her attention onto her daughter and Alex. She smiled apologetically at Alex as she came towards her. Alex was still standing frozen to the spot. She didn't know if she should try and help Piper or not.

"Isabelle, I'm going to count to ten and if you don't let go of Alex then we are never coming back to Nicky's." It was a threat that she always used and it worked most of the time.

"No!" screamed Issy again as she dug her fingers painfully into Alex's leg.

"One..." warned Piper to her daughter.

Issy just glared back at Piper. She didn't budge from Alex's side.

"Two..." Piper was now once again crouched down in front of her daughter. She was counting down on her fingers.

There were unshed tears in the little's girls eyes as she continued to look at Piper. Her lower lip trembled slightly in fear as Piper got closer to ten.

"Three..."

It took Piper to get to six before the little girl broke.

She immediatly let go of Alex's leg and threw her arms around Piper's neck. She cried slightly into Piper. Piper wrapped her arm around Issy before lifting her up. "I know, I know..." she murmured into her daughter's ear. She automatically began to rub circles into Issy back.

Piper caught Alex's eye briefly as she stood up before turning towards Nicky and Lorna, who were standing off to the side. They smiled towards her.

"Thanks again," she whispered.

"No problem," they both replied back at the same time.

"Issy, can you say bye to everyone and thank Auntie Nicky and Auntie Lorna for a good day?" Piper looked down at her daughter who had calmed down now and was sucking her thumb.

Issy nodded her head as she looked up at Piper. There were still tears in her eyes as she lifted her head and looked over at Nicky and Lorna. "Thank you." she murmured.

"Thank you," replied back Nicky as she took step towards Piper and addressed the little girl. "And now can you do me a favour?" she asked in a whisper. Her voice was gentle and warm.

Alex couldn't help but cock an eyebrow at this. She had never seen this tender side of Nicky before. This little girl really did have Nicky wrapped around her finger, she thought as she continued to look at them.

The little girl eagerly nodded her head, she had Nicky's full attention.

"Be a good girl for your mom and Bubbe. And eat lots of birthday cake. Do you think you can do that for me?" asked Nicky, her brown eyes focused sonly on Issy's face.

Issy nodded her head at this.

"I'll see ya later, kid!" whispered Nicky before she pressed a kiss to Issy's forehead.

"See ya later, alligator," giggled back Issy as her face broke out into a sudden smile. She then waved goodbye to Nicky and Lorna.

The little girl then turned her head towards Alex, who was still standing in the corner of the mud room by the door. "Bye, Alex!" she whispered.

Alex couldn't help but feel a tug on her heartstrings at this. She found her face breaking out into a small smile at the little girl. "Bye, Issy." she whispered, giving a small wave with her hand.

Alex could feel Piper's eyes on her but she didn't dare to look at them. She looked anywhere but there as Piper said her own goodbyes before leaving the house.

* * *

><p><em>September 2017- Labour Day<em>

It was two hours later and Piper was in full on-labour. The weather outside had worsen and the power had just gone off ten minutes ago.

Things weren't looking too good.

Nicky had tried using the landline in the house to get a hold of either Polly or Larry letting them know what was going on but she had only gotten machines. She had luckily been able to get a hold of Piper's doctor. The doctor had given Nicky a few pointers on what to expect and do once the contractions became closer together. And to top things off neither of their cell phones were working. It was just the three of them as the baby was about to be born.

Piper let out a moan as another contraction came over her. Her hands gripped into the sheets of the bed. It felt like someone was pressing down on her abandon. Her contractions were now coming every ten minutes or so. They lasted for about 30 seconds. She had thought about having a natural birth but she hadn't been expecting any of this. She wanted drugs, she thought as the contraction ended. She was trying to use the breathing techniques she had learnt during birthing class. But nothing could take the edge of the pain away. She didn't know how other women did this. It was hell, she thought.

"Your doing great," murmured Lorna as she pressed a wet cloth to Piper's head. She didn't know what else to do in this situation. There was nothing else to do but be there for Piper and pray. The whole room was filled with candles and oil lamps that they had found around the house.

Piper closed her eyes briefly before opening them again and looked up at Lorna. "I want to get up," she stated. She felt the need to move around.

"Okay," whispered Lorna as she helped Piper get to her feet. Piper was only wearing a t-shirt now as she walked around the room. She couldn't remember feeling so uncomfortable than she did at this moment. She remembered Polly telling her about Finn's birth but she hadn't thought it would be anything like this. There was pressure in her lower back and she was hot as hell. She just wanted this to be over soon. She breathed heavily through out her nose as another contraction came over her. Each one seemed to be worse than the one before.

xxx

"FUCK!" swore Piper loudly as she pushed hard, using every muscle in her body to get the baby out.

It was now five hours later. Piper had been in labour for almost 9 hours now. The baby was on it's way. Her contractions were now overlapping each other. Once one ended, another one would start.

It was the early hours of the next day and the power was still out. They had tried using their cell phones again but there was still no reception at the house.

Piper's body was drenched in sweat. She was completely naked now as she lay on the bed. Lorna was hovering over her, not really sure what to do while Nicky waited to deliver the baby.

It seemed like Piper had been pushing forever. She really just wanted it out of her. She was exhausted and delirious feeling. She moaned as she closed her eyes and rested her head against the pillows.

"Why won't it come out?" whined Piper as tears stung her eyes.

"It will come out soon," replied Nicky , not sure what else to say. She have never given birth or knew anything on pregnancy. She didn't know what to do to make Piper feel better. They were all a little tired at this point.

Both her and Lorna were trying to be positive about the whole thing though. They were trying not to let their nerves and fear show to Piper. For it would just make this worse for the blonde.

Piper grunted as she sat up again and breathed through another contraction. She was overcome with the need to push again. "I'm going to push," she whispered towards Nicky.

Nicky locked eyes with Piper through the dimming lit room and nodded her head.

This went on for another twenty minutes longer before the baby began to crown. Piper grunted as she felt her vagina stretch and the baby reared it's head.

"I see the head," explained Nicky towards Piper, "it's got no hair."

"Oh my GOD!" cried out Lorna as she peered down between Piper's legs and watched as the baby was born.

A second passed before the room filled with the sounds of it's cries. It had a healthy set of lungs, that was a good sign, thought Nicky to herself as she lifted the baby up into her hands. The baby was small, she noted as her peered down at this little creature.

Lorna came to stand beside Nicky and looked down at the baby. Tears filled her eyes at the sight of it. She had never witnessed such a beautiful thing before than what had just happened. Lorna brought her hands up to her face as she continued to look at the baby.

Piper's heart was beating rapidly and her breathing was laboured. She closed her eyes for a second as she felt her body give out. She lay down on her back and felt her body suddenly relax. She couldn't believe that it was over. That she had just given birth. She was overcome with emotions.

As she lay there for a moment trying to catch her breath, she felt a coldness suddenly on her chest. She looked up to see a red, wrinkled being lying there. She immediatly reached out and touched the baby.

She was memorized.

"Hi," she whispered as she carefully moved the baby to the crook of her arm and tried to sit up. She hadn't yet figured out the sex or asked but she didn't care. Whatever it was. It was beautiful, she thought.

"Congrats, Chapman, it's a girl," whispered Nicky a smile playing on her face as she looked on at mother and child. There were tears in Nicky's eyes but she didn't let them fall.

No one said anything for a few moments longer. Everyone was too memorized by what had just happened.

Piper found herself crying as she continued to hold her daughter close to her chest. The baby had stopped crying and was merely whimpering softly. She was overwhelmed with emotion and joy. She couldn't help but smile as the baby opened her eyes and focused them on Piper. She knew that the baby couldn't make out faces or anything just yet but she could feel her heart melt as those eyes looked back at her.

This little person had only just gotten here and already won her heart.

* * *

><p>Thanks for reading and leave a review if you like.<p>

Julie


	8. Chapter 7

Do not own Orange Is the New Black or any of the characters.

Again, you guys are too kind. Your reviews always put a smile on my face.

Thank You! :)

SO, I seem to can't get be able to get away. So I'm going to try continue on writing this story and balancing my thesis and school work. We will see. :)

Got to say, I had fun writing this chapter!

Enjoy!

* * *

><p><span><strong>Rainstorms<strong>

_**Chapter 7**_

_Princesses and Pirates _

_September 2017_

Alex was minding her own business like usual as she ate her lunch in peace (or as peacefully as it could get in the crowded prison cafeteria), when Red approached her.

She frowned slightly as the Russian Cook slid into the spot across from her at the table. She still wasn't use to Red giving her special treatment like she was now as she dropped a yogurt onto her tray.

It was strawberry.

Alex's favourite.

Alex looked from the yogurt to Red and back. "What's this for?" she asked as she cocked an eyebrow at the old Russian woman.

Red just stared at Alex for a long moment. She didn't know if she should be offended or amused by this question. Never had someone questioned every good thing she did like Alex did. Red had taken Alex under her wing but the brunette kept on questioning it.

A hearty laugh was then released from the cook's lips as she smirked at Alex. "It's just yogurt, Vause. Just shut up and eat it!"

Alex raised both her eyebrows in surprise at this before smiling slightly back at Red. She held the older woman's gaze for a second before shyly looking away and down at the container of yogurt. She wasn't use to people being nice to her at Litchfield. Everyone here seemed to have some kind of motive. "Thank you," she whispered before looking back up at the cook.

Red just shrugged her shoulders as if bringing Alex a yogurt was no big deal.

A brief silence then fell over the two woman as Alex slowly pulled back the seal of the yogurt.

"Have you talked to Nicky lately?" asked Red in her thick accent. Her hazel eyes pierced into Alex.

Alex just shook her head as she licked the back of the seal and looked up at Red. She hadn't talked or seen Nicky for about a week or so now. She hadn't come to visit this week. Alex knew she had been away in the Hamptons or something for the long weekend.

"Blondie had her baby," stated Red.

Alex tried to keep her face blank of emotion as she heard this. She didn't want to hear about Piper or her baby. It hurt too much. She was done with that part of her life.

"She had a girl," continued on Red. The Russian didn't seem to care or notice that they were talking about a painful subject for Alex. She had heard about the baby being born last night when she had called Nicky. "Nicky delivered it."

Alex couldn't help but look surprise at this. Despite trying to keep her emotions at bay she couldn't help but look at Red at this. "Nicky delivered it?" Her brows fussed together as her green eye pierced into Red, waiting for an answer.

"Yeah. Blondie had the baby in the middle of that awful storm a few days ago. They were up at some cottage or something when she went into labour. The power went off and Nicky was there to deliver it. She said she had never been so afraid of a vagina before!" Red couldn't help but laugh at Nicky's reaction on the phone. Her daughter had admitted to being scared that something could have gone wrong with the birth. Piper had lost a lot of blood and passed out for a moment after giving birth but everything had worked out. Nicky had cut the cord. Lorna had cleaned the baby off as Piper had pushed the after birth out of her. The power had eventually come back on and they were able to call everyone and tell them the news.

Alex looked away at Red at this. A million thoughts raced through her mind at this new bit of information. She felt tears sting her eyes but she blinked them away. She didn't know how to feel about this. Piper was now a mother. She didn't' know if she should feel happy that Nicky had been there for her. She pursed her lips before looking back at Red, who was once again staring at her.

"What? Your best friend delivers your ex's baby and you have nothing to say?"

Alex just shrugged her shoulders.

Her face was once again blank and cold towards Red. There were a tone of things she could say, she thought but she wasn't going to. At least not to the Russian Cook who would just report it all back to Nicky, who would tell Piper since they were such close friends now. Alex felt a green snake of jealously slither through her at this but she tried to push it away. Nicky was allowed to be friends with Piper, she told herself.

Red continued to stare at Alex before letting out a sigh. She wasn't going to get another word from her, she assumed.

"Enjoy the yogurt, Vause," she stated before rising to her feet and allowing for Alex to be alone again.

The Russian cook placed a comforting hand on Alex's shoulder as she passed her on the way back to the kitchen.

* * *

><p><em>September 2021<em>

Piper leaned against the doorframe of the room and peered down at the sleeping form of her daughter. She couldn't believe it had been four years since she had given birth. It seemed like just yesterday that she was telling Nicky and Lorna that her water had broken. It brought a smile to her face to think about how her fireball of a daughter had come into the world during a fucking storm. She couldn't have waited just a day longer, she thought. Her daughter from day one had her own agenda it seemed. And she still did. Issy marched to her own beat most days.

She was a wild child.

Piper had never thought her life would had turned out the way it had. But she wouldn't change it if given the chance too. Yes, she had lost Alex. The only person she had ever, truly loved. But in her replacement had come Issy. Never before had she loved something so much. Yes, she had loved Alex and a small part of her still did. She would always love her. What they had had was real. There was no denying it. But the love for her daughter was something else all together.

She had never really understood the bond of a mother and child before until she had become one. She knew that everyone's mother said this but it was the truth. It was something one had to experience to understand-fully. Piper had never had the best relationship with her own mother. So when Issy had come along, she promised herself to do better. She had wanted the type of relationship with her daughter that Alex had once described having with her mother. They were friends before being mother and daughter.

Where Piper's mother had judged, Alex's had encouraged.

Piper wanted Issy to grow up feeling loved every minute of everyday. She wanted Issy to never have to question herself or who she was as a person. She wanted Issy to be Issy and not some version of what someone else wanted her to be.

She wanted her daughter not to make the same choices that she had. To not be afraid of who she was as a person and not to let people tell her otherwise. She wanted her daughter to be a good, kind person and to help others. But at the same time, not to put other's happiness in front of her own.

Ultimately she just wanted Issy to be happy.

She knew she was only four and still had years of heartache a head of her but she was hoping that Issy would have a better head on her shoulder than her mother had.

* * *

><p><em>October 2017<em>

The apartment filled with the piercing screams of the baby.

Neither Piper or Larry moved though towards where Issy lay in her bassinette. They just continued to glare at one another. Both were sleep deprived, Piper more than Larry. Larry had just come home late again from work, reeking of alcohol and smoke. This was the third time this week.

Piper hated how he was avoiding coming home and she knew it had to do with their daughter. Parenthood hadn't been the easiest transition for them. Larry was a good father. He changed dirty diapers and rocked Issy to sleep when she was fussy. But that didn't make it all peaches and cream between them. They always seemed to be arguing nowadays over little things like how Larry didn't empty the dishwasher or was holding Issy wrong.

And now over the last week or so, he was coming home late while Piper stayed home all day taking care of their daughter.

Larry didn't see the big deal. He wasn't staying out that late or coming home drunk like Piper was making it seem.

Piper just stared at Larry for a second longer listening to the high-pitched wails of the baby before sighing.

She hated this.

She had thought it would be different. She knew it wouldn't be easy but she hadn't thought she would be left alone all day with the baby. Larry was suppose to be here more often. He had said he would be working at home more now. But that had only happened for the first two weeks after Issy had been born before he said it was better working at the office, where it was quieter.

Piper didn't say another word as she turned her attention away from her husband and down towards the crying baby.

"Sssshhh," she whispered as she lifted the infant carefully into the crook of her arm. She made sure to support the back of the head as she took a seat on the near by chair and began to pull down the zipper of the black hoodie she was wearing. She paid no attention to Larry, who was still standing there as she began to breast feed their daughter.

* * *

><p><em>September 2021<em>

"Are you coming?" asked Nicky as she peered in the threshold of the attic.

"Coming where?" asked Alex in confusion as she looked up from the book she was reading and over to Nicky. She cocked an eyebrow in her usual fashion as she took in the appearance of her friend. "And what the fuck are you wearing?" A smirk appeared on her face as she gestured to the white puffy sleeved shirt that Nicky was wearing.

"What? You don't like. This is all the rage at the moment," joked Nicky as she pulled at her top and smiled at Alex.

"It looks like the shirt that Jerry Seinfeld wore in that Seinfeld episode," commented Alex.

"Well...I at least wear it better than Jerry did!"

Alex just laughed and shook her head at Nicky as she closed her book and stood up from her seat on the bed.

"But are you coming?"

"Again, coming where?"

"To Issy's fourth birthday party," stated Nicky as she came further into the room, "She asked you last week if you would come and you said yes."

"No, I didn't!" replied Alex, the smile fading quickly from her face. "I said no fucking thing!" She was suddenly pissed. There was no way in hell that she promised Issy she was going to her party.

"Look to be fair I don't think at the time you knew what you were being asked. But Issy will remember...that kid doesn't forget a damn thing." explained Nicky towards Alex.

Alex just stared at Nicky. She didn't care if Issy could memorize the telephone book or what she had said last week. She wasn't going and that was that. "I'm not going!" She stated like a teenager with her hands at her hips.

"And I'm pretty sure Piper wouldn't want me there either. It's just a whole lot fucking easier if we keep our distance." Not to mention it hurt less if she stayed away. She knew if given enough time, she would fall for the blonde again. That was something she couldn't afford to happen again. She couldn't, wouldn't allow for the blonde to break her fucking heart, again.

A deadly silence fell over the room as the two women just glared at each other. Alex was dead serious. She wasn't going to some birthday party for her ex's kid.

Nicky just sighed. She knew that there was no fighting with Alex. She was right. She shouldn't be forced to go to Issy's party just because she might had said yes. Piper, she knew wouldn't be to happy if Alex had showed up anyways.

There was a brief moment of silence between them before Nicky opened her mouth to say something.

"You know she doesn't know about what you did to Pennsatucky..."

Alex's eyes widened in surprise before darkening completely.

It had been a while since she had heard that name. She pursed her lips not knowing what Nicky was getting at. She regretted what she had done to the meth-head. But it had stopped her from bothering Piper like she had wanted her too, all those years ago now.

"I never told her..."

Alex just continued to stand there, gazing at Nicky. She didn't know what she wanted her to say.

"And good, it should stay that way." she stated simply in reply. She didn't want Piper ever to find out what she had done.

It wouldn't change anything, anyways.

It was in the past.

Nicky opened her mouth to say something but quickly decided against it. She just merely looked at Alex for a second longer before heading back down the stairs. She still needed to finish getting dressed for the party. It was princess and pirates themed. She was going as a pirate. Lorna as a princess.

* * *

><p><em>February 2018<em>

"This isn't working," stated Larry towards Piper.

Piper looked up from where she was changing the baby's diaper and over towards her husband, who was hovering in the doorframe. A look of puzzlement was plastered on her face. Her blue eyes were wide as she stared at Larry. What wasn't working? she thought.

"I can't do this anymore," he stated as he took a small step into the room.

"Can't do what?" asked Piper in confusion as she threw the dirty diaper into the genie before reaching for a new one.

Issy cooed slightly on the changing table.

"I can't do this...be a family...with you," His voice was filled with nerves and guilt. His brown eyes stared intensely into the side of Piper's face. Their arrangement wasn't working anymore. It had never really worked. They both knew it. Since the baby had been born all they had done was fight.

Piper wasn't happy.

He wasn't happy.

It was about time someone said something.

Piper was silent for a second as she finished putting the clean diaper onto the baby and began to redress her. "So what? you're _just_ leaving?" asked Piper as she lifted the baby up and against her chest and looked over at Larry.

"Pipes, you can't tell me you are happy with the way things are between us?"

"I'm trying to be," she stated in a quiet voice. She didn't want to fight. She was tired of fighting with Larry.

"I'm sorry but I want a divorce. " Larry's voice was clear as day.

Piper let out a sigh. She knew that he was right. That it wasn't working between them. But it still didn't stop it from hurting. They were suppose to be a family. She knew it was stupid but she had thought that they would have gone back to the way things were before Litchfield. They had been happy back than. But they were both two different people now or at least Piper was.

Piper felt the tears in her eyes but she didn't let them fall as she slowly nodded her head in agreement.

Maybe this was for the best, she thought.

Larry continued to look at her for a second, "I'm leaving tonight." His bags were already packed and waiting by the front door. He couldn't stay here longer.

"Your fucking leaving tonight?" asked Piper, looking over their daughter's head and at him. This was a surprise. "Like tonight, tonight?" She asked like there was more than one night in the day.

"Yes, tonight." stated Larry.

"Where are you going?" she asked out of curiosity. She was trying to keep her voice blank of emotion but was struggling. It just felt so sudden. So rushed.

"I'm moving in with my...girlfriend."

"_Girlfriend_!?"

"Yes, my girlfriend, Naomi."

Piper's heart was racing as she glared at Larry. He had a fucking girlfriend?! When the fuck did that happen? She knew that things weren't perfect between them but she hadn't been expecting this! Larry had always been loyal to her.

"When did this fucking happen?" she asked. She thought Larry had ended it with Naomi after finding out that she was pregnant with Issy. "Did you _never_ break up?"

"We did. But she moved back to the city in October and we got to talking and one thing lead to another...I'm sorry, Pipes." And he really meant it. He had never meant for any of this to happen. He had really wanted to try and be a family with Piper for their daughter's sake. But they didn't love each other anymore.

It just wasn't working.

Piper just looked away from Larry at this for a second. She focused her eyes on a decal on the wall of an elephant. She was suddenly finding it hard to breath. She couldn't help but feel like someone had just sucker-punched her in the stomach. She continued to hold Issy against her chest, cradling the back of her head. She could hear the voices in her head telling her she deserved this. That she had cheated on Larry with Alex, then Alex with Larry and now he had done and did the same thing. Just with Naomi instead. Tears pricked her eyes as she looked back at Larry.

"Are you still going to be a father or when you say you are leaving...you are really leaving like walking out on your daughter or is it just me?" She was afraid to hear the answer.

Larry opened his mouth in shock at this. He looked on at Piper like she had grown three heads suddenly. "Piper, you know that I _love_ our daughter. I love Issy!" He then enclosed the space between them and placed a hand on the curve of Issy's scalp. He caressed the soft feathered hair as his eyes locked with Pipers. "This isn't goodbye. I'm not walking out on her. I will be there for every school production and dance recital. For every birthday and Christmas. You can't get rid of me that easily," he joked.

Piper couldn't help but laugh sadly at this.

The two of them just smiled at each other for a second longer before Larry leaned down and kissed the top of Issy's head.

"This is for the better," he whispered as he gently cupped the side of Piper's face. "You'll see."

Piper just nodded her head slightly at this. She hoped that he was right. That this would be for the better.

* * *

><p><em>September 2021<em>

Piper couldn't help but laugh as guests began to arrive at the apartment. Everyone had stuck to the dress-code. Everyone had come either as a princess or a pirate. Or in some cases, both. Some guests had dressed up to the nines going full out where some had just worn a tiara on their heads, i.e. her mother.

The apartment was filled with the cries of children laughing and playing. Piper had invited Issy's whole nursery school class, which consisted of 20 kids between two and four. On top of that there was Polly's two sons, Cal's twin girls Veronica and Vera who had just turned six and Danny's son Lance who was just a year.

And that was just the kids. To each kid, there was at least one parent. Never before had Piper had so many people in her apartment.

"It's open," called out Piper, who had her hands full with a tray of snacks.

A moment later, Nicky and Lorna entered the foyer of the apartment.

"Hey Chapman!"

"Hey," greeted back Piper, her face breaking out into a smile at seeing the two women. "Nice shirt," she commented on Nicky's puffy shirt before proceeding into the living room to feed her guests.

"Why is everyone hating on the shirt?" asked Nicky as she pulled at the collar of her shirt and looked over at Lorna. She liked the shirt.

Lorna just smiled at Nicky before reaching out and brushing something off of her shoulder. "I like it," she whispered tenderly before leaning forward for a quick kiss.

"Auntie Lorna! Auntie Nicky!" cried out Issy as she came running down the hallway towards the couple.

"Hey, birthday girl!" cried out Nicky as she looked down at the little girl.

"Don't you look pretty?" cooed Lorna.

"I'm a princess!" stated the four year old with pride as she held up her chin and did a twirl, showing off her dress. It was a tutu style dress. It was suppose to mimic the one Rapunzel wore in Tangled (Issy's favourite princess.) The skirt was made of layers of different shades of purple tulle. The top of the dress was lilac with capped sleeves. It had satin details along the edges. It was suppose represent a corset with a pink ribbon criss-crossed in the front. Piper had it custom made for the occasion. It had been part of her gift.

The outfit was completed by a tiara on Issy's head.

"Wow!" spoke Nicky, grinning excitably at Issy. Chapman had gone all out, she thought to herself.

"What about me?" asked Lorna as she too twirled and showed off the dress she was wearing. She was dressed up as Snow White.

"You look pretty too!" stated Issy, approving of Lorna's outfit.

Nicky couldn't help but smirk as she took the sight of Lorna in that dress. She made one hot Snow White, she thought. She couldn't wait until later on when she would have her way with her in that dress. Nicky caught Lorna's eye at this and winked at her.

Lorna knew exactly what she was thinking about as she blushed under Nicky's gaze.

"Where's Alex?" asked Issy, interrupting the couple. Her brown eyes stared up at them with determination.

Nicky couldn't help but sigh as she looked away from Lorna and down at the little girl. This was the question she had been hoping wouldn't be asked.

"She had to work," she whispered, smiling gently at her Goddaughter. She hated to lie but Issy wouldn't understand Alex real reasons for not coming. She was too young.

Issy didn't look to happy about this. Her lower lip trembled slightly. She had been looking forward to her new friend coming to her party. She had wanted to show Alex, her bunk bed. "Is she coming later?" she asked with hopeful eyes.

"She said she would try her best," lied Nicky as she placed an hand on top of Issy's head and ruffled her hair slightly.

This answer seemed to satisfied Issy as she nodded her head before reaching out and taking both of Nicky's and Lorna's hands. "Come on..." she stated as she dragged them into the heart of the party.

xxx

Alex swore underneath her breathe as she came down the stairs and saw the wrapped gift lying at the foot of the stairs.

It was Issy's present.

She swore again as she looked down at the glittery purple wrapping. She didn't know what was in it but she knew that Nicky had put pride into the gift. She had overheard Nicky telling Lorna about it the other day.

She debated what to do.

They had left over two hours ago now. She didn't know when the party ended. She assumed it still had a few hours to go. Her best option was probably phoning up Nicky and telling her the gift was here. She could always drop the gift off herself, but she didn't really know where Piper lived and didn't really want too.

Letting out another sigh, she quickly reached for her phone in the pocket of her jeans and dialled Nicky's number. The phone rang five times before she got Nicky's voice mail.

"Fuck, Nichols! swore Alex loudly as she placed her phone back into her pocket and once again looked down at the present. She felt like it was mocking her in away. She was torn between leaving it there and pretending she hadn't seen it or making an effort to get a hold of Nicky.

She once again reached for her phone and tried Lorna's number this time but only got voice mail.

She sighed again as she sat down on the bottom step, beside the present and ran a hand through her hair. A certain brown eyed little girl appeared in her mind. She knew that Issy probably wouldn't even noticed that the gift wasn't there. She was probably getting a truck load of gifts today, thought Alex. But at the same time she knew that Nicky would be disappointed for forgetting the gift. She knew how important that kid was too her.

"Fuck!" she swore after a minute had passed and she was once again on her feet. She headed towards the kitchen where she knew she would be able to find out the exact address of Piper's apartment building.

She couldn't believe she was doing this. This went against everything she had promised she wouldn't do.

Voluntarily go to Piper.

xxx

Piper was the one to hear the soft knocking at the front door.

Everyone else was too busy eating birthday cake which had just been cut and served. Cal's wife had made it. It had been in the shape of a castle.

"It's open," called Piper as she came into the hallway from the kitchen and approached the door as it opened.

She paused as she locked eyes on Alex.

What was she doing here? she thought. Nicky had said she wasn't coming which she wasn't surprised about. She understood that it was uncomfortable for her.

It was uncomfortable for her too.

Alex didn't say anything at first as she stared into those blue eyes of Piper's. Her heart raced as old feelings fluttered slightly in the pit of her stomach. No matter how hard she tried, she knew that Piper would always have a hold on her heart. It just took one look at her to bring it all back. Their time together in Piper's cramp studio apartment...their world travels...Litchfield...

Each good memory came rushing back in that one look.

They both felt it.

Piper chewed on her bottom lip nervously. She didn't know what to say or do. She could feel something stir within her.

Something she hadn't felt in years it seemed.

The two women continued to stand in silence for a moment longer before Alex cleared her throat and remembered the real reason why she was here. She tore her eyes away from Piper and looked down at the gift in her hands. Her long hair fell slightly into her face, hiding it for a second before she looked back up at Piper. "Nicky...forgot her gift...I just wanted..." Her voice trailed off as she lifted the gift up to Piper for her to take.

Piper looked confused for a second as she looked from Alex down to the gift. "Oh," she whispered as she slowly reached out and took the purple gift into her hands. Her hands brushed slightly against Alex's as she did so. She couldn't help but blush slightly as she felt a wave of electricity course her. Her eyes shot immediatly up at Alex.

She had felt it too.

An awkward silence then fell between the two of them as they continued to get lost in each other eyes.

Alex knew she should leave.

She had done what she had come to do. There was no reason to stay but at the same time, her feet were glued to the spot. She didn't want to leave.

"Do you want to stay?" asked Piper as she adjusted the gift in her arms. "We just cut the cake and there is plenty food left..."

Alex shook her head sadly from side to side. A small smile appeared on her face as she looked on at Piper. She knew she was just being nice and asking if she wanted her to stay. "I don't think so, kid," she whispered.

Piper nodded her head in understanding at this.

However, before Alex could leave the sound of pounding feet could be heard coming towards her.

"ALEX!" cried out Issy in joy as she locked eyes on the older woman. "You CAME!"

Alex looked down at the little girl at this.

She opened her mouth to say something but before she could she felt a warm little hand on her own, pulling her further into the apartment.

"Issy!" cried out Piper at her daughter. "Alex, I'm sorry."

Alex was at a lost for words as the little girl continued to pull her down the hallway, Issy was talking a mile a minute to her. She was taken back by how strong the little girl was.

"ISSY!" cried out Piper again after them. She couldn't believe her daughter. She placed the present down by the door as she followed the duo, where they were headed to Issy's bedroom.

Issy had just gotten bunk beds for her birthday from Larry and she was very proud of them. She liked to show everyone who came into the house.

xxx

Alex stood in the middle of the room in a daze as Issy continued to talk off her ear. She couldn't believe she was still here. Piper had told her daughter to let her go but Alex had found herself saying it was okay. That she would stay. She didn't know why exactly she had said she would. She guessed she was just more lonely than she thought she was and wanted some company for the night.

But at the same time, it didn't take the uncomfortable away from the situation.

She didn't know how to deal with kids. She just stood there watching as Issy ran around the bedroom.

The walls were painted a lilac. Everything in the room was a shade of purple from the dark plum floor rug in the middle of the room to the bedspreads on each of the bunks, noted Alex. She then remembered what Issy had told her the first day she met her, that her favourite colour was purple. And, she guessed she had meant it.

"Issy," she heard Piper whisper again from the doorway. "Come on. You can show Alex your toys later. We are going to open presents soon."

Issy stopped immediatly what she was doing and dropped the doll she had been showing Alex at her feet and ran towards Piper at hearing about presents.

Alex watched as Piper took her daughter by the hand and led her out of the room. She looked briefly over her shoulder and caught Alex's eye before leaving the room.

Alex stood there for a second before leaning down and picking up the abandoned doll. It was of one of the Disney princesses. She just wasn't sure of what one. She studied the doll's face for a second before placing it down on the bed.

She then left the bedroom and walked down the hallway. She could easily slip out the front door and leave, she thought as she eyed the front door. However, she didn't want to be seen a rude.

The moment to leave had passed. She had no real choice but to stick it out and stay for the next hour or so.

She just hoped it would go by quickly.

* * *

><p><em>April 2018<em>

"Come here you," whispered Alex as she reached in the dark for the other woman. She let out a hearty laugh as her hands came into content with warm skin. She ran her hands up and down her arms, feeling the soft hairs that covered them before dipping her head and pressing a kiss to her lips.

They were in the utility closet.

They were going to have to be quick, thought Alex to herself as the kiss deepened and hands began to roam.

She had been ''seeing' Wren or Rowell as the guards called her, for about over a month or so now. She had arrived at Litchfield six months ago. Alex had been immediatly attractive to the newcomer with her long honey brown hair and hazel eyes. Rowell was almost ten years younger than her but she didn't care. She was hot. The two of them had flirted heavily for a good month or so before Alex had made her move.

She'd been the first person that Alex had been with since Piper.

The two women continued to make-out heavily for a few moments longer before breaking apart. Alex pushed her glasses up into her hair as she smile in the dark towards Wren.

Wren smiled seductively back at her. Wren winked playfully at Alex before reaching for the edge of her shirt and pulling it off over her head in one fluid motion.

Alex couldn't help but groan as she felt a warmth spread between her thighs and looked on hungrily at Wren.

"Come here," she whispered again as she enclosed the space between them. Her hand immediatly went to Wren's hip, pulling her once again close to her. They stared intensely at one another before their lips crashed passionately together in a kiss.

The kiss was wet and rough.

* * *

><p><em>September 2021<em>

"Here," whispered Nicky as she came to stand beside Alex on the outskirts of the room.

Alex uncrossed her arms as she took the plate of birthday cake from Nicky's outstretched hand. "Thanks," she murmured.

"No problem, Vause," answered back Nicky. "How are you holding up?" Her brown eyes were filled with genuine concern. She knew this was the last place that Alex wanted to be at the moment.

Alex shrugged her shoulder in reply as she stabbed the plastic fork into the confetti cake and took a bit of it. She was trying not to think about where she was at the moment and so far it hadn't been as bad as she thought it would be. Piper was too busy playing hoist to make eye contact with her, which she was graceful for. Issy was occupied opening her presents and everyone was watching her. She had a brief unpleasant conversation with Polly and a brief head nod from Larry but that had been it.

Piper's mother had seen her come in with her daughter but she hadn't spoke a word yet to Alex. The two women had only met once briefly, nearly twenty years ago now. She wasn't even sure if Carol Chapman remember her or not but she didn't care either way.

The two women continued to stand there in silence watching as Issy slowly unwrapped a odd-shaped package.

"Did you leave the gift on purpose?" asked Alex as she swallowed a mouthful of cake and turned to look at Nicky.

Nicky just merely smirked in reply to this.

"Cunt!" swore Alex underneath her breath so that only Nicky could hear it.

Nicky just laughed at this.

Alex wanted to be mad but found her face breaking out into a smile, despite herself. She just shook her head before going back to her cake. She couldn't help but feel like she was back in Litchfield as her and Nicky stood against the wall. It felt like they were at one of those going-away parties, watching the events around them. Poking fun and laughing at the others.

As Alex finished her cake, something caught the corner of her eye. Piper was standing off to the side of the room beside the swinging door of the kitchen and looked to be in an arguments of sorts with her mother. Alex couldn't make out what they were saying but it didn't look to be good. Piper looked upset, she noted. She watched as Piper threw her arms up into the air and stormed into the kitchen.

She turned to look over at Nicky, who wasn't paying any attention to Carol or Piper. She was talking to Cal, Piper's younger brother.

Alex let out a sigh as she glanced at the kitchen door again before down-casting her eyes onto the now empty paper plate. She hated how she felt like she needed to go check up on Piper. Piper was a big girl. She didn't need Alex to check up on her. Plus, it wasn't her responsibility to see if she was okay. It had long ago stop being her problem. But despite all that, she couldn't shake the need to go see if she was okay.

She counted to ten before excusing herself from Nicky and Cal, who weren't paying her any attention as she left and headed towards the kitchen.

She was just merely throwing her plate out, she told herself as she pushed opened the kitchen door.

Piper had her back turned towards her. She was muttering something to herself that Alex couldn't make out. She stood there awkwardly for a second, feeling stupid. Piper, she couldn't tell was upset or not as she watched as she scrubbed roughly at a plate in the sink.

Alex thought about making a quick escape but before she could, she still needed to clear her plate. Her green eyes quickly scanned over the room, looking for the garbage. It took her a moment to locate it. It was just off to the side of where Piper stood, scrubbing at the same plate.

Alex's heart began to pound loudly against her chest with sudden nerves as she slowly walked towards the garbage. Her eyes never leaving Piper's backside. The blonde was still lost in her own little world, muttering furiously to herself.

Alex had successfully dumped her paper plate and fork into the garbage without Piper noticing her, it wasn't until she was leaving that Piper decided to turn around.

"Alex!" cried out Piper in surprise. Her blue eyes were wide as they looked on at Alex's face. Her cheeks were flushed in embarrassment. She hoped that the brunette hadn't caught what she was saying to herself.

"Hey," whispered Alex as she turned around to face Piper. Her green eyes scanned down her body slightly. It was the first time she was seeing really what Piper was wearing. She was dressed in a blue Cinderella dress. She couldn't help but smile slightly at how ironic it was that she was suppose to be Cinderella and she was cleaning.

Piper cocked her head to the side at this, "What?" she asked, looking down at her dress. "I know, I'm too old to be playing dress-up."

"No, no, it's not that," replied Alex, shaking her head slightly. The smile was still on her face as she locked eyes with Piper again. She made a hot Cinderella, she thought. But of course, she wasn't going to tell her that.

They continued to stand their awkwardly for a second longer. There was so much they needed to talk about but at the same time there wasn't really anything to talk about. Piper brushed her hair off of her face slightly before pulling off the yellow rubber gloves she was wearing. "Look, Alex," she began to speak, "I just wanted to say thank you."

Alex fussed her eyebrows together in confusion at this. "Thank you? for what?"

"For being so nice to Issy. For I dunno...for putting up with her...for putting up with me I guess. I know, you really didn't have a choice. But..." Her voice trailed off as she looked down at the floor. She wasn't really sure where she was going with all this. She didn't want Alex to forgive her or anything. She just felt she needed to say something to the brunette.

To clear the air a little.

Alex didn't say anything as she continued to glare at the blonde. She nervously shoved her hands into her jeans and shrugged her shoulders.

The two ex-lovers just looked at each other before they were interrupted by someone coming into the kitchen. It was Issy, who was in tears. Piper immediatly turned her attention away from Alex and to her daughter.

"Baby, what's wrong?" she asked as Issy buried her face into the skirt of her dress.

"Sebastian...stepped...on...my...toe," spoke Issy through her tears to Piper.

"Your toe?" asked Piper, making sure she heard her daughter right.

"Ya, my toe!" moaned Issy as she lifted her left leg for Piper to see her toe.

"I'm sure Sebastian didn't mean too," whispered Piper as she knelt down so she was eyelevel with her daughter. She gently brushed Issy's blonde hair with her fingers. "He's only a baby."

Sebastian who, had just turned two was with obsessed with Issy. He followed her everywhere. Both Piper and Polly find it adorable but Issy not so much.

Issy didn't look too pleased with this answer. She stuck out her lower lip in a pout.

Piper couldn't help but smirk slightly at her daughter. She was a little drama queen sometimes, she thought. "Do you want me to kiss it better?" she asked.

Issy nodded her head in reply to this.

"Okay," whispered Piper as she smiled at the four years old before leaning down and kissing her little feet. She kissed each of her toes, not being sure what one it was that had gotten stepped on.

"Ew! Stinky feet!" whispered Piper as she lifted her head and plugged her nose, pretending that Issy's feet stunk. Which they didn't.

Issy couldn't help but laugh at Piper at this. "I don't have stinky feet! Mommy!" cried out Issy through her laughter. "You being silly!"

Piper just grinned at her before she began to tickle her sides, making the four year old laugh harder.

This went on for a moment longer as Piper then pressed a kiss to Issy forehead and stood up.

She looked briefly away from Issy and over to the door. There was no sight of Alex in the room. She sighed before looking back down at Issy, who was rubbing her eye. She was tired she could tell. It had been a long day for her. She then took Issy's hand and led her back into the living room.

* * *

><p>Thanks for reading and please review- love hearing from you all.<p>

Julie


	9. Chapter 8

Do not own Orange Is the New Black or any of the characters.

Going to be honest, not a whole lot happens in this chapter.

Enjoy, anyways!

* * *

><p><span><strong>Rainstorms<strong>

_**Chapter 8**_

_Love at First Sight_

_April 2018_

"Hey," whispered Piper as she smiled weakly at Nicky.

"What's up Chapman?" Nicky smiled at Piper as she entered the apartment.

"Tired," stated Piper as she closed the door and ran a hand through her hair.

"I bet," answered Nicky as she continued to look on at Piper. There were deep circles underneath the blonde's blue eyes. "How is the little one?"

"She's teething," explained Piper as she motioned for Nicky to follow her into the kitchen. "She was up all night. She's luckily sleeping now."

Nicky nodded her head as she followed Piper into the kitchen and took a seat at the kitchen bar. Shat sat there quietly watching as Piper moved around the room. "Do you want tea or coffee?"

"Whatever, you're having," replied Nicky with a shrug of her shoulders.

"Two coffees coming up," spoke Piper as she pulled two mugs out of the dishwasher and began to brew a fresh pot of coffee. A comforting silence fell over the two friends as Piper busied herself for a few minutes while the coffee brewed. Nicky just sat there, drumming her fingers along the edge of the counter.

"Here," whispered Piper as she placed a steamy mug of black coffee down in front of Nicky a few minutes later. She then slid into the empty stool beside Nicky at the breakfast bar.

"So, what did you want to ask me?" asked Nicky as she blew slightly on the mug before breaking it up to her lips. Her brown eyes looked over at Piper.

Piper didn't answer right away as she took a long sip from her own coffee before putting down the mug and meeting Nicky's eye. "Well, you know how we are having Issy baptised this weekend..." Piper wasn't religious and neither was Larry. But to make both of their parent's happy they were having a baptism for Piper's and had a mikveh for Larry's.

They had no real intentions though of raising their daughter with any sort of religion.

"Yeah," replied Nicky nodding her head slowly.

"Well, I want you and Lorna to be Issy's second set of Godparents," explained Piper. Polly and Pete were Issy's first set and would be the ones participating in the baptism. However, she wanted for Nicky and Lorna to have a official title too.

Nicky was taken back by this.

"Don't worry you wont have to be part of any ceremony or anything. I just wanted to ask if you would watch out for her and be another set of parents for her," continued on Piper, nervously. She had thought a lot about this. Nicky was someone she never really imaged being friends without of Litchfield but by someway, they had become quite close. Nicky had been out of Litchfield for about two months or so when Piper had gotten out. The two women had helped each other out. Nicky always seemed to be there for Piper. And she wanted her to be apart of her daughter's life too.

Nicky just continued to stare at Piper. She was taken back by all this. Issy already had a special place in her heart, Piper knew this. Being present a the birth had brought something out of Nicky, she didn't know she had. Her mothering side. The kid already had her name as her middle name. That was enough of an honour for her.

"Chapman," began to speak Nicky at this.

"Look, It's not big deal if you don't want too. I understand. I just..."

"Chapman, I will do it." spoke Nicky, cutting Piper off.

Piper's blue eyes locked with Nicky's brown ones at this. "You will?"

Nicky just grinned and nodded her head at Piper at this. She would be honoured to be one of Issy's Godparents. And she knew Lorna would be thrilled too.

"The kid will need someone to come talk to when you become like your mother," teased Nicky, as an amused look appearing on her face.

Piper just rolled her eyes and smiled at this. She was happy to hear that Nicky agreed.

"Thank you," she whispered.

"No, Chapman, thank you," replied back Nicky as she reach out and pulled Piper into a hug. She was touched that Piper wanted her to be apart of her daughter's life. No one had ever thought of her like that before. She was always looked at, as the bad seed. The bad role model.

The person, you didn't want your kid to turn out to be.

* * *

><p><em>September 2021<em>

"Whatcha want us to do?" asked Lorna towards Piper.

The last guest had just left the party. The apartment looked like a mess. Piper had tried to clean up as she went but there was still a lot of cleaning to do. Piles of wrapping paper covered the living room floor. There were abandoned glasses and paper plates scattered around the room.

"Oh, you guys don't have to do anything," replied Piper, "Really it's fine. Go home. Enjoy your evening."

"Piper, let us help," insisted Lorna. "It's really no big deal. Whatcha want us to do?" asked the small brunette again. She didn't really mind lending a hand to Piper.

Piper just stared at the small woman dressed up as Snow White for a moment before sighing. She knew there was no point in fighting with Lorna. "You can, I guess help clean up in here," She gestured around the living room.

"Good! I like to help," Lorna smiled warmly at Piper before she began to pick up the wrapping paper.

Piper watched Lorna for a second before she reached for a few empty glasses and plates and head back into the kitchen. She stopped suddenly though in the threshold of the room as she noticed who else was in the kitchen. Alex stood in the middle of the room with Nicky. The two of them were in the middle of a conversation. However, they each stopped talking the moment that the blonde walked in the room.

"Don't stop on my account," spoke Piper as she looked between the two of them before heading to the dishwasher. She could feel their eyes on her but she didn't dare to look as she busied herself with loading the dishwasher.

Nicky looked over at Alex who was staring at Piper's back side.

Alex prayed that Piper had no overheard their conversation.

Nicky had once again had brought up Pennsatucky. Piper still had no clue what Alex had done for her all those years ago now at Lichfield. Nicky ,thought that Piper needed to know. It would change so much between her and Alex. They both needed to start communicating and she thought that would be the best place to start.

Honesty was key for them.

However, Alex didn't see it like that.

Alex ,slowly looked back at Nicky and shook her head. She wasn't going to tell her. It would just complicate things. She didn't understand why Nicky wanted her to tell her so badly. It wouldn't help anything. It would probably just make it worse between them. Plus, she was trying not to have any sort of relationship with the blonde now. So why would she confess to doing something, years after? It didn't make sense. She once again shook her head at Nicky, silently communicating with her to drop it. She was done talking about the past.

Nicky just rolled her eyes at this. She hated how stubborn the raven-haired woman was being. She continued to glare at her for a moment longer as she crossed her arms over her chest before looking over at Piper.

Piper had finished loading the dishwasher and now had her attention back on Nicky and Alex. Her blue eyes looked between the two women. She tried to catch Alex's eye but Alex was avoiding her gaze.

The two of them hadn't spoken since Piper had thanked her over an hour ago now. She wonder what she was thinking. Alex was a closed book to her now it seemed. She didn't seem to know what she was thinking anymore. And she guessed it made sense, considering all that has happened between them in the pass four years. But it didn't mean she had to like it. She hated how she felt like she needed to walk on eggshells around her.

Letting out a deep sigh, Piper ran a hand through her hair and turned her attention away from Alex.

She suddenly felt exhausted.

The party had been crazier then she had expected it would be. Kids had cried. Unexpected guests had arrived. Plus, she had gotten lectured once again by her mother. Which seemed to be almost daily now since she had become a mother herself. Nothing Piper did seemed to be right in her mother's eye. Piper was happy to say the least that the party was over.

The blonde was suddenly in need of a drink, she thought as she sighed again.

She then made her way towards the fridge and reached into the back of it, where she had hidden beer. It wasn't exactly hidden. Just out of reach of little hands. She grabbed two cans and turned back to Nicky and Alex.

"Here," she spoke as she tossed each of them of can.

"Thanks Chapman," cried Nicky as she caught the can and smiled at Piper. This was an unexpected surprise.

"Um...thanks," murmured Alex as she caught the can with two hands. She stared at it for a second before slowly meeting Piper's eye.

The room came to a stand still in that moment as their eyes met. It was hard to describe but like always, no time seemed to pass between them at that moment.

One look could hold so much power between them, it seemed.

Alex had once told Piper how if you had a connection with someone, it never truly went away. You snap back to being important to each other because you still are. And that was what they had together. It didn't matter how many years passed or how they left things. Just one look, was like that first time they had met decades ago on that snowy November night at the bar.

All those butterflies of excitement and attraction came rushing back.

The two former lovers continued to look at each other for a moment longer before Piper shyly dropped her gaze. She could feel her cheeks flushing as she turned her back away from Alex and back onto the fridge.

Alex then nervously licked her lips and stared down at the floor again. She could feel Nicky's eyes burning into her side but she didn't dare to look at her. She couldn't help but feel extremely exposed at the moment. There was a cold sweat running down her back as she tried to get over this feeling fluttering in the pit of her stomach. She hated how Piper could have such a power over her. Her heart was hammering against her chest cavity as she closed her eyes and continued to clench the beer in her hands. So many feelings and thoughts were coursing through her body at this moment. She didn't know exactly what she was feeling or should be feeling.

As she opened her eyes a second later, she noticed that Piper was staring straight at her with those bright blue eyes of hers. Her skipped a beat again as she looked deeply into them. She seemed to be holding her breathe for a second before casting a sideways glance over to Nicky.

However, Nicky wasn't there.

It was only the two of them.

Alone.

Piper had a beer in her hands but it was unopened. Her blue eyes continued to studied Alex's face for a second before speaking.

She couldn't take the silence any longer. She needed to say something, anything to break the tension that was thick like fog in the room.

"I'm sorry, if our last conversation was a little uncomfortable. I just honestly don't know what the fuck to do about this...about...us," her voice trailed off nervously. She bit down on her bottom lip as her eyes continued to burn into Alex. Since the last time they had spoken, or Piper had spoken, she felt like Alex had been avoiding her. She, once again wanted to try, to clear the air between them.

Alex stared intensely back at the blonde for a moment before replying.

"I honestly, don't know the fuck either..."

And it was the truth.

She was torn between being Piper's friends or not being anything at all. She wished she could move on but their lives were too intertwined without either of them trying.

A sad smile appeared on Piper's face at this. They both seemed to be so lost at the moment on what to do. She knew that things couldn't go back to the way they had once been. But at the same time, she hoped they could some what move pass it all. She knew that they should talk about all this.

But what was there really to say?

Alex, she assume didn't forgive her for sleeping with Larry and she didn't regret it.

There was no way they could moved pass that.

* * *

><p><em>September 2018<em>

"Happy Birthday to you!"

"Happy Birthday to you!"

"Happy Birthday dear Issy!"

"Happy Birthday to you!"

One year old Issy looked around at the swarm of people around her. The tot didn't seem to know what to do about all the smiling faces staring down at her. She began to whimper slightly as she reached towards Piper.

Piper just laughed before she lifted the tot from her high chair. She made a face at her daughter before trying to get her to blow out the candle on the cake, which lay in front of her on the table.

It was Issy's first birthday and they were having a small party for her at the same place she had been born. It was just Nicky, Piper, Lorna, and Polly's family there. There was going to be a much bigger celebration for the tote in the next week at Larry's house in Brooklyn. It was there that all immediate family would attend. It was suppose to be originally at Piper's but Larry had a bigger place then she did.

Issy looked up at her mother with confusion. She didn't understand what she was suppose to do. Her brown eyes filled with tears as she looked down at the flame of the candle. The little girl seemed to be scared of the small burning flame of the candle. The tot whimpered again as she buried her face into the nape of Piper's neck and her little hands clenched at her shirt.

"Looks like Momma will have to do the honours!" squeaked Lorna, as she smiled warmly at Piper.

Everyone laughed at this.

Piper smiled down at her daughter who was clinging to her. She kissed the tot's crown and ran a hand down the back of her head, feeling the soft blonde hairs that rested there.

She couldn't believe it had been a year since she had given birth to this precious child in her arms. So much had changed in that last year it seemed. She was no longer married. Larry was still living with his girlfriend, Naomi.

And she was alone.

She hadn't been single in a while but she wasn't really alone, she thought. Piper had Issy in her life, now.

Issy was her world.

Her love.

Motherhood had been hard for Piper at the beginning. Especially, after Larry had left her. But it had become a little easier each day for her and now, she wouldn't change it for anything else.

She loved being a mother.

Piper's eyes shined with tears as she continued to cradle her daughter before leaning forward and blowing out the candle on the cake.

This was her baby's first milestone of many more to come.

* * *

><p><em>September 2021<em>

"She's out like a light," commented Nicky as she leaned over the side of the couch and looked down at the sleeping birthday girl.

"It's been a long day for her," replied Piper with a smile as she brushed a stray hair off her daughter's sleeping face. She couldn't believe how peaceful she looked. It was a sight she would never get tired of seeing.

Nicky grinned as she continued to look down at her Goddaughter. It was unbelievable how much she loved this kid like her own. It sometimes scared her. She had never thought of being a mother. Especially since she had never had a good role model growing her. Motherhood scared her, to say the least. However, when she had held that tiny being in her hands, four years ago, she had been smitten.

It had been love at first sight for Nicky. And after four years, that love was still going strong. She would move heaven and earth for this little girl just to see her smile.

Nicky continued to look down at Issy before looking across the room at the other love of her life. Her hazel eyes darkened immediatly as they locked on Lorna's. A wide grin spread across her face as Lorna smiled back at her.

It had been love at first sight for them too.

* * *

><p>Okay, so there wasn't a whole lot of Vauseman but don't worry I have lots of plans for the girls...(laughs evilly!)<p>

Like always, thanks for reading and please review!

Julie


	10. Chapter 9

Do not own Orange Is the New Black or any of the characters.

Just a quick message to the guest- Toye, who left a review on the last chapter about Alex and Piper's ages. 44 is not too old for Alex. Yes, 44 might be too old for the timeline of what the show goes off of but when I started writing Snowflakes, I changed it a bit. I've always written Alex as four year older than Piper and Piper was 22 when she met Alex. They were together for four years. Making Piper 26 and Alex 30 when they broke up. Then six years passed before they were at Litchfield. Making Piper 32 when she entered in 2013. Alex would be 36 when she went to Litchfield. Then Piper got out in 2015- making her 34 and Alex 38. Then add another six years and she is 44 when she got out in 2021 and Piper 40. Just thought I should explain. I have planned out their timeline to a T.

Also, there will be flashbacks from Snowflakes in this. Non-con, just a heads up.

Anyways, enjoy the chapter!

* * *

><p><span><strong>Rainstorms<strong>

_**Chapter 9**_

_Laundry_

_February 2019_

"Are you crazy?" asked Piper as she glared across the table at Nicky.

"What?" replied Nicky with a shrug of her shoulders. "It's been a while for you. Joanna is hot! Go for it!"

Piper just continued to stare at Nicky at this. She couldn't believe what she was hearing from her friend. No, there was no way she was doing that, she thought to herself. She couldn't. She wouldn't.

"Are you seriously thinking about turning her down?!" Nicky couldn't believe that Piper was thinking about turning down Joanna. If she wasn't with Lorna she would definitely get with her.

"I am in no position to go out with her..."

"You're single."

"Yes, but I also have a daughter to think about," explained Piper as she looked down at the sleeping toddler in her stroller. She hadn't gone out with anyone since her divorce, and she didn't have any plans on going out anytime soon. Love was a complicated thing for Piper. She had already loved twice in her life and had screwed it up both times. She was better off just focusing on her daughter and loving her rather than putting herself into a relationship at the moment.

"Joanna knows that you've a kid," replied Nicky. She couldn't believe how stubborn Piper was being at the moment about this. Joanna was a friend of Lorna's. She had met Piper a couple of days ago and had asked her out on a date. "That's no big deal."

Piper didn't say anything as she continued to look at her sleeping daughter's face. The blonde was a little skeptical. Yes, Joanna was hot. She had blue eyes and blonde hair like Piper. She and Piper had flirted a little, but she was no Alex.

"Is this about Vause?" asked Nicky as if reading Piper's thoughts.

Piper head snapped up at this, her eyes locking with Nicky's. No, this was not about Alex, she thought. Yes, she still loved her, and she was the last woman she had been with. But this was way more than just about her.

"Because, you know she has a girlfriend," continued on Nicky. She had yet to tell Piper that Alex had found herself a little jailbird girlfriend to keep her company.

Piper cocked an eyebrow at this. She tried not to let too much emotion show on her face. This was the first time she was hearing that Alex had a girlfriend, but it didn't surprise her. Litchfield was a lonely place. It was good to have someone there with you to love. As much as it hurt, she was happy for Alex. "It's not Big Boo, is it?"

Nicky's face broke out into a wide grin at this. "No, she isn't the newest Mrs. Boo."

"Well...I'm happy for her. It's good she has someone at Litchfield. It's a rough place to be alone in..." Piper's voice trailed off as she downcast her eyes onto the surface of the table. She was suddenly filled with memories of Litchfield. Good and bad ones.

Nicky was quiet as she looked on at Piper. She was right. Litchfield was a bitch to go through alone.

A moment passed before Piper looked up at Nicky.

"Okay," she whispered. As much as she didn't want to, she knew that Nicky wouldn't drop it until she agreed. Plus, it was only a date. Not marriage or anything serious. If Alex could move on, so could she, she thought. What was she waiting for really? Alex wasn't getting out anytime soon. And even if she did, the chances that they would get back together were next to impossible. Piper deserved to be happy, everyone else seemed to be.

Nicky cocked an eyebrow at this. Was the blonde saying what she thought she was saying?

"Okay. I'll do it. I'll go out on the stupid date."

Nicky grinned at this, "You won't regret it, Chapman!"

Piper couldn't help but smile back at Nicky. She hoped she wouldn't regret it.

* * *

><p><em>September 2021<em>

The room was quiet except for the sound of the washing machines.

Alex was at work and once again found herself doing laundry. It was only her at the moment as she opened one of the machines and began to pull out the load of bed sheets that had just been done.

She hated being down here. Especially on her own.

It reminded her too much, felt too much like Litchfield's laundry room.

She hated it.

It was usually easier when she was surrounded by the other maids. She didn't really get along with them, but all their chatter took her away from her own thoughts. They distracted her.

But it was the nightshift and just her.

She chewed on her bottom lip as she closed the door to the machine and carried the basket full of soaking wet sheets to the dryer. Her back ached slightly, but she continued to work away.

It had been a week since Alex had seen Piper. Issy had just started school and wasn't over at the house so much. She had mixed feelings about this. She was happy that she didn't have to worry about coming back to the house and seeing Piper there, but at the same time, Alex wanted to see her. She was so used to seeing the blonde on a regular basis now that she found herself almost getting disappointed when she didn't see her. It was confusing to say the least.

As she finished loading the dryer and was starting a new load, a sudden thought came to her mind. One that she couldn't shake.

Ever since Nicky had mentioned Pennsatucky, she couldn't get the hick out of her mind. Pennsatucky had been released from Litchfield two years ago. Her and Alex's paths had crossed over the years, but they had avoided each other for the most part. Alex had hated what she had done to Doggett after the fact, but she wouldn't admit it to her. Plus, it had solved one of her problems.

Pennsatucky had stopped making Piper's life at Litchfield a nightmare.

As Alex continued to stand in the laundry room alone with the thundering of the machines in the background, she was drifted back to that day that changed everything.

She had been seeing red that day. She was out for revenge on Pennsatucky for selling out Piper to Healy. She had missed her chance with Healy for what he had done to Piper, but Pennsatucky had still been there, causing trouble. She had wanted to put that bible-thumping hick in her place. She had needed to be taught a lesson...

_"Oh, so you don't have any idea why Healy got fired? huh?" Alex asked, cocking an eyebrow, her eyes continued to pierce intensely at Pennsatucky. "You wouldn't have anything to do with that now...would you, Tiffany?" Her voice filled with sudden sweetness as she spoke Pennsatucky's name slowly. She then released her left hand from Pennsatucky's wrist and slowly trailed a finger down the curve of her neck. She wanted to make the other woman squirm. _

_"That's such a pretty name...T-IFF-AN-EE," she drew out each sound slowly, caressing each syllable with her tongue as she leaned in closer to Doggett's, planting a kiss softly on her jaw line. She smiled as she felt the other woman stiffen slightly at her touch. _

_"You don't know what ya talking about, dyke!" whispered Pennsatucky as her eyes locked with Alex, who was still continuing to grin at her. Her hand was traveling slowly along the V-neck of the front of her shirt. Taunting Pennsatucky. _

_"Oh, really?!" whispered Alex in reply, the smile was gone from her face as she continued to glare at Pennsatucky. Her left hand was back, pinning Pennsatucky's wrist against the wall. Alex then slowly began to move her arms, so that her wrists were pinned above her head. _

_Pennsatucky tried to break free, but Alex was too strong for her. _

_Alex just sniggered slightly at this. "So you aren't the reason why Piper is walking around like a fucking zombie for what Healy did to her?" Alex's voice was filled with coldness towards the meth head. Her heart was beating rapidly with adrenaline as she continued to press Pennsatucky against the machine. _

_Pennsatucky didn't say anything at this. There was a mix of emotions playing out on her face as she continued to look up at Alex. _

_"Were you that fucking pissed off at her that you had to report her to Healy?" Alex continued. "I know... I know, she beat the crap out of you, and she deserved to pay. But it's been five fucking months! Couldn't you let it go? Huh? Didn't Jesus forgive Judas for giving him up...couldn't you do that same? Couldn't you fucking be the bigger person, Pennsatucky, and just let it all go? And maybe, for once, forgive someone like Jesus fucking teaches people to do?" Her voice was low but filled with rage towards Pennsatucky as she continued to hold her wrists in place. _

_Pennsatucky, once again, didn't say anything in reply. _

_"Shit! Doggett! You really are that fucking pigheaded!" snarled Alex in disbelief. "You really thought that you would get away with all this...that you could trust that bastard Healy to not give you away? That Piper wouldn't figure it all fucking out?...If I didn't know any better, I would think you were jealous of her in a way...Maybe you secretly have a crush on her and are upset that she flat out rejected you...just like she did with Healy...mmhm, how fucking close am I now?" asked Alex, a smile once again playing on her lips. She blew hot air against Pennsatucky's exposed neck, making her squirm again. _

_"Healy was fucking jealous that Piper chose me...instead of him. And I am starting to think that the same goes for you, Tiffany," she once again whispered her name tenderly, "That you fucking loved Piper and was pissed off she didn't return your affection...so then you and Healy got together to plot revenge on her...What is this? Fucking Mean Girls or something?" Alex was silent for a moment as she continued to purse her lips at Pennsatucky. _

_"What did Healy give you as a reward, huh? What did you ask for in return for snitching on Piper? Taystee I heard got candy from him...What did you fucking get?" She raised her eyebrows once again, waiting for Pennsatucky to reply, but she knew she wasn't going to. "Well, I hope whatever it was, it was fucking worth it...because you know what Tiffany...you're going to hell! Maybe not today...maybe not to tomorrow...but when judgement day does come...you're fucking going to burn in hell...Jesus doesn't like a snitch!" _

_A silence then fell over the two women as they continued to lock eyes with one another. _

_"You're fucking going to burn in hell!" murmured Pennsatucky. Her voice was bitter. Her eyes were filled with burning rage as she raised her chin at Alex. "Jesus has my back! I might have snitched, but that bitch fucking deserved it! She's a sinner. A no-good sinner! She fucking deserved everything she got from Healy! And you're going to burn in hell too! Jesus doesn't like lesbians!" Her voice rose higher and higher with each word spoken. She had suddenly found her confidence. _

_The corners of Alex's mouth tugged upwards, showing her teeth to Pennsatucky like a wolf. _

_She was done playing nice. _

_"I will show you a sinner!" whispered Alex as she pressed her body further up against Pennsatucky. _

_"I don't know if you remembered, but I said I would fuck you, literally...and this your lucky moment," she whispered, seeing the fear flash before Pennsatucky's eyes. She did remember. _

_Alex smirked at this before she placed a soft kiss on the side of Pennsatucky's neck..._

Alex knew that she had gone too far with Pennsatucky, but the smaller woman had never snitched on her. After the incident, Alex had left the laundry room and gone to dinner like nothing had happened. She had walked on eggshells for days it seemed afterwards. But nothing happened. Prison life had gone on. The only thing that changed was that Pennsatucky kept her trap closed. Well, at least around her and Piper. She never bothered the two women again while at Litchfield.

Alex couldn't help but let out a deep breath as she pushed her glasses up into her hair and rubbed her face. An unnerved feeling fluttered in the pit of her stomach. She wasn't one to live in the past. She tried to put all the bad stuff that had happened in her life behind her and live only in the present. However, there were always a few things that she couldn't get away from.

Piper being the first and what she had done to Pennsatucky coming in as a close second.

It would forever haunt her.

And there was no way she was going to tell Piper. She had never planned on doing so when she was with Piper and had no plans on doing so now. Nicky was wrong, it wouldn't open the lines of commutation between them, thought Alex to herself.

It would do the opposite. It would close them.

* * *

><p><em>February 2019<em>

Piper couldn't believe she was doing this. Never in a million years did she think she would be going out on a date with a friend of Lorna's.

Especially a female friend.

Piper had always been attracted to both sexes but had swayed more to the male side, usually. It wasn't until Alex Vause had stepped into her life that things changed. She had been attracted to Alex from the start. She had been her first real romance with a woman since that summer fling she had with Lucy Martin when she was thirteen. She had fallen for Alex and hard. After the break up, Piper had dated a string of both women and men, but nothing had really satisfied her or compared to what she'd had with Alex, until Larry came into the picture.

But she hadn't dated anyone since either of them. This was her first date in years, and she was a little nervous to say the least.

Piper continued to take in her appearance in the mirror of the vanity when there was a knock at the front door. Her blue eyes immediately glanced over to the clock on the wall. She cursed underneath her breath before rising to her feet. She then made her way out of the room and to the front door.

"Coming," she called out.

"Hey, Chapman," greeted Nicky warmly to Piper as she opened the door a moment later.

"Hey," greeted back Piper as she continued to glance down at the other woman before gesturing for her to come inside. Nicky was here to babysit Issy while Piper went out on her date.

"How are things?" asked Nicky as she slowly began to unzip the black parka she was wearing and continued to look at Piper, who was shutting the front door.

"They're okay," answered Piper in a nervous voice.

"You nervous?" asked Nicky with a slight smirk on her face. Her brown eyes gleamed with amusement as she handed Piper her coat.

Piper just shrugged her shoulders as she took the coat from Nicky and hung it up in the hall closet. "Just a little," she murmured, a slight smile peering on her face.

The two women continued to look at each other before Nicky clasped a hand onto Piper's arm. "You will be fine. It's just a date. Enjoy it. You never know, it can lead to something more, and if not. No biggie. There are plenty of other bitches in the dog park!"

Piper couldn't help but laugh at this. Nicky, no matter what, always seemed to know how to put a smile on her face. "Thanks," she replied.

"So where's the little one?" asked Nicky. Usually Issy was glued to Piper's side.

"She's sleeping," replied Piper as she motioned for Nicky to go into the living room. "She didn't have her nap this afternoon. I'm hoping she'll sleep through the rest of the night, but knowing Issy, she won't."

Nicky just nodded her head at Piper as she made herself comfortable on the couch.

"She's already eaten dinner, but if she does wake up...there is a bottle of milk already prepared in the fridge. You can give her that," Piper continued to explain. She knew that Nicky already knew all this. This wouldn't be her first time babysitting the tyke. However, she still felt like she needed to explain.

"Okay," replied Nicky, nodding her head in understanding. She pretty much knew all this.

"I shouldn't be late," Piper ran a hand through her hair. "Probably around ten-ish or so."

"Chapman, don't worry about being late or not. I got nowhere to go. Enjoy the night," Nicky meant this. Piper deserved to have a night out. The blonde hadn't been out since she'd the kid. She needed to have a little fun, she thought.

Piper let out a deep breath as she nodded her head slightly in agreement. She wanted to enjoy the night, but she was just so fucking nervous.

* * *

><p><em>September 2021<em>

Piper stiffened a yawn at the sound of the dryer going off.

It was late, and she was doing laundry. It was the only time that the machines in her building seemed to be free. Standing up from where she was seated on one of the plastic chairs that lined the wall, she slowly walked towards the machine.

She felt her body protest as she suddenly knelt down and began to unload the machine, but she carried on. Piper, who had turned 40 in March still made sure to run and do yoga, but she could feel her age at times. She didn't have as much energy as she used to have, especially with taking care of a four-year-old.

Piper slowly straightened her back as she rested the heavy laundry basket on her hip and walked out of the room. She still had another load to do which she had left upstairs in her apartment. The blonde usually did her laundry when Issy was with Larry like tonight. It made it a lot easier when she didn't have to keep an eye on the energetic four-year-old.

The blonde returned to the laundry room a few moments later with another load of clothes.

As she loaded the clothes into the washing machine, she couldn't help but think of Alex. She always thought of Alex when she did laundry it seemed. The two just seemed to go together in her mind. Alex probably would hate being associated with laundry, but Piper couldn't help it. She had a few memories of Alex that involved a laundry room or laundry in some sense. There had been the time that she and Alex had had sex in the Laundromat down the street from Piper's crappy student apartment. And that time on their world travels when they just threw their dirty clothes in the hallway for the maid to pick up. And that time in Litchfield when Alex had gotten stuck in the dryer. And that other time when she had kissed her in the laundry room.

Piper couldn't help but sigh as she thought about all those times. She didn't know how she should be feeling about Alex. They had barely talked or seen each other since that moment in the kitchen. And there had been a moment, she thought. There were always some sort of moment with Alex. They had too much history together for there not to be.

They would always have some sort of connection, she figured.

Alex Vause would forever seem inevitable to her.

* * *

><p><em>February 2019<em>

Piper found herself blushing as she stood just outside of her apartment building and met Joanna's eyes. It was pouring rain and the two women were standing underneath an umbrella.

It was odd to have rainfall like this in the middle of winter. Usually, around this time there would be snow or ice pelts. But no, this was full-on rain like April showers kind of rain.

The date had gone surprisingly well. Way better than Piper had thought it would have. Joanna, like Piper, was a lover of anything organic and green. She was a college graduate like Piper. She was just a year younger than Piper. The two women had hit it off well tonight.

And the most surprising thing was that Piper had fun tonight. A lot more fun than she'd in a while.

The blonde found herself getting lost in Joanna's blue eyes. It had been a while since she had felt such a strong attraction to someone. It was liberating to say the least. The two women continued to look into each other's eyes for a moment longer before Joanna spoke.

"I don't usually do this on first dates, but...can I kiss you?"

A small smile appeared on Piper's face at this. She once again blushed underneath Joanna's gaze before slowly nodding her head.

Yes, Joanna could kiss her, and she did.

Joanna flashed a smile at Piper before tipping her head to the side and pressing her mouth to hers. The kiss was tender and soft just how Piper had imagined it would be. Piper's mouth responded to this. She immediately kissed her back.

They stayed like this for a moment or two longer before breaking a part. They once again stared intensely at each other before leaning in for another one.

The second kiss was a little longer and rougher than the first one had been.

* * *

><p>Okay, you all probably hate me. There was no Vauseman, but just wait for the next chapter. It will be all Vauseman...wink...wink! lol.<p>

Thanks for reading and don't forget to review!

Julie


	11. Chapter 10

Do not own Orange Is the New Black or any of the characters.

This is what everyone has been waiting for...Enjoy! :)

Special thanks goes out to Fig-aruna for editing this chapter and helping a girl out! :)

* * *

><p><span><strong>Rainstorms<strong>

_**Chapter 10**_

_Scrapbook of Adventures_

_October 2021_

Alex shouldn't really have been smoking, but she couldn't help herself. She needed something to take the edge off, and drinking was out of the question. It was only eleven in the morning on a Saturday.

She had picked up smoking since coming out of Litchfield. She found it helped calm her nerves. Especially now when she was trying to avoid a certain blonde. Over the last month she had seen Piper at least ten times. After Issy's birthday, she hadn't seen Piper that much, but over the last couple of weeks that all changed.

She saw Piper everywhere now and not just at Nicky and Lorna's house but at Starbucks or that one time at the subway coming home from work. Their paths were always crossing in some way. And it wasn't like they meant to. Alex certainly didn't mean to run into Piper the other day while she was with Polly. But they did live in the same fucking city. It was bound to happen, she guessed.

But it didn't mean she had to like it.

When these run-ins would occur there would be that first wave of awkward tension between them before it faded to a familiar feeling. A feeling that both were trying to ignore.

Alex was seated on the back patio of the house. She had a blanket wrapped around her shoulders as she continued to smoke. The skies were grey that morning. It looked like it was going to rain, she thought as she looked up to the sky and let out a puff of smoke. It was her first day off in what seemed like forever.

She planned on doing nothing.

xxx

"She is your fucking daughter too!" cried Piper into the phone at her ex-husband. Larry was bailing yet again on taking their daughter for the day. "You know, I didn't climb onto myself and create her!"

"Piper, I said I was fucking sorry. You think I like this. I don't," explained Larry on the other line, "But I can't help it when some loony decides to fire a round of shots at the mayor..."

Piper just rolled her eyes as Larry once again launched into the details of his job. She didn't give a fuck what happened to the mayor. She only cared about her daughter and whether she got to see her father. "Yeah, yeah, I know it's your job. But what about my job? I have a meeting with Barney's in two hours. I can't possibly bring Issy with me."

"Look, do you want me to come pick her up and drop her off at my mother's? Or Naomi says she will watch her?"

"No, no it's fine. I will figure something out!" Piper didn't need to see Larry's parents at the moment, and Issy didn't always get along with Naomi one-on-one. The four-year-old didn't like her stepmom much or her new half- siblings. Larry and Naomi just had twins in the summer.

The blonde continued to talk to Larry for a few moments longer before hanging up.

She cursed loudly as she slammed her hands down onto the counter, along with her phone. She hated this. Larry had been such a good father up until he had gotten this new job. He was always missing his days with Issy. And things had just gotten worse with the arrival of the twins. Issy was lucky if she got to see Larry once a week now. Their original agreement had been that Larry would have Issy every other weekend plus on Mondays and Tuesdays.

"When's Daddy coming?" asked Issy as she suddenly appeared in the kitchen. Her brown eyes were bright with curiosity.

Piper looked down at her daughter. She hated to tell Issy that Larry wasn't coming. Issy was a Daddy's girl. Despite not liking his new family, Issy loved her Daddy. "He's not, baby," Piper spoke in a soft gentle voice. She hated breaking her daughter's heart. "Something came up at his work."

The blonde came around the side of the counter and knelt down at her daughter.

Issy looked back at Piper with a saddened look at this. "Oh," murmured the little girl in disappointment.

"I'm sorry, baby," whispered Piper as she cupped the side of her daughter's face.

"Will you take me to the movies then? Daddy said we could go," Issy looked up at Piper with hopeful eyes. The newest animated movie by Disney was coming out that day, and Larry had promised Issy they would go see it.

Piper frowned at this. She really wished she could take Issy to the movies, but she couldn't bail on this meeting. She had already rescheduled it twice. Barney's was her biggest client, and she needed it to stay like that.

"Mommy's got to go to work," whispered Piper. "But how about I take you tomorrow? Huh? We can get popcorn and candy..."

Issy didn't like the sounds of this. She didn't want to go tomorrow. She wanted to go today like she had been promised. She pouted out with her lower lip and stomped her foot slightly.

Piper knew that the tears and wailing would come next.

"No! I want to go today!" cried the little girl in protest. Her brown eyes continued to pour into Piper's.

Piper would kill Larry next time she saw him. She hated how he made promises to their daughter like this and then didn't come through. She sighed as she looked away briefly from Issy. The blonde was trying to think of someone who would be able to take Issy last minute to the movies. Polly was out of the question. She was due to have her baby any day now, plus by the time she got Issy to Polly's house, she would have missed her meeting. The only other people she could call on such short notice were Nicky and Lorna, but she hated to bother them like this.

"Just give me a minute, Issy," stated Piper to her daughter as she planted a kiss on Issy's forehead before standing up. "Go play in your room..."

Issy just stood there looking up at Piper with unshed tears in her eyes before going off to her room.

Piper rubbed the side of her face before reaching for her phone. She prayed that Nicky or Lorna was home and would be able to take Issy to the movies. Or else she would have a very disappointed little girl on her hands.

xxx

As Alex finished her cigarette, the house phone went off.

She cursed underneath her breath as she quickly put out the cigarette and rose to her feet. She then made her way back inside the house where the phone continued to ring. Nicky and Lorna were away for the weekend. They had gone up to Rhode Island for Lorna's cousins wedding. They wouldn't be home until late Sunday evening or earlier Monday morning.

"Hello?" answered Alex breathlessly into the cordless phone and pressed it to her ear.

There was no answer.

"Hello?" she asked again.

"Hello?"

"Hi," whispered Piper shyly on the other line.

"Piper!?"

"Hi, Alex."

A moment of silence fell between them as both women tried to get over the shock of hearing each other's voice. Piper hadn't been expecting Alex to answer, and Alex hadn't been expecting that it would be Piper calling.

"Is Nicky home?" asked Piper once she found her voice. She suddenly felt very nervous like a teenager talking to her crush for the first time on the phone. She could feel her pulse racing at just listening to the sound of Alex's breathing on the other line.

"No, she isn't..." replied Alex. She was surprised that Piper was asking this. She figured that the blonde would know about the couple going out of town for the weekend. "Her and Lorna went out to Rhode Island for a wedding this weekend."

"Shit!" swore Piper into the phone. She had completely forgotten about them going out of town. "Shit!" she swore again.

Alex frowned into the phone. She could sense that something was wrong. "What's up?" she asked before she could stop herself.

Piper was silent for a moment. She didn't want to burden Alex with her problems. She knew that Alex couldn't care less and was just asking to be nice. "It's nothing..." she lied.

Alex thought that even after all these years she could sense when the blonde was lying. "Come on, Pipes...what's wrong? You clearly phoned needing something..."

Piper thought about lying again, but she figured what was the point. Alex would only push her until she spilled the beans. "I need a babysitter..." she found herself admitting to her ex-girlfriend.

Alex once again found words coming out of her mouth like vomit before she realized what was happening. "I'm available."

"What? No, Alex...you don't have to...that's not what I meant..."

"Pipes."

Piper could feel her heart flutter as hearing her old nickname on Alex's lips. Everyone called her Pipes, but the way that Alex said it was different. It could make Piper melt on the spot.

"Alex," whispered Piper in response.

"I'm available. Let me help."

xxx

Alex couldn't believe this was happening as she pulled down the hood of her sweatshirt further over her face as she ran through the rain from the cab to the apartment building. She couldn't believe she had just agreed to babysit Issy for a couple of hours while Piper attended her meeting.

It seemed like all her rules were going out the window, one by one.

It took a good five minutes before she stepped off the elevator and headed towards Piper's apartment. Her heart was pounding against her chest as she walked slowly down the hallway. She was nervous to say the least about seeing Piper again.

It felt surreal to her as she approached the door and knocked. The last time she had felt this out of place was when she had first knocked on that dressing room door and met her dad.

The door immediately flew open for her.

Alex braced herself to see a certain blonde. However, a different blonde greeted her instead.

"ALEX!" cried out Issy, a wide grin on her face.

Alex looked down at Issy for a second before returning the smile.

"Hey, kid."

Issy continued to grin up at Alex before reaching for her hand and pulling her into the apartment. Alex was once again taken back by how strong the little girl was.

"ISSY! IS THAT ALEX?" called out Piper from her bedroom. She had heard someone at the door, but Issy had reacted more quickly than she had. She was in the middle of getting dressed for her meeting.

Issy just ignored her mother's call as she closed the front door and pulled at the sleeve of Alex's leather jacket. "Take it off!" she spoke to Alex.

"Ok. Ok." replied Alex with a slight smirk on her lips. She couldn't believe how demanding this little girl was. She was once again taken back by how much she was like Piper. When Piper wanted something, she went after it, no questions asked. Just like Issy was doing now.

After Alex had quickly stripped off her leather coat, Issy took it from her and hung it up as best as she could on the coat rack by the door, just like she had seen Piper do. Alex watched her with fascination. The little girl always had a serious look on her face whenever she seemed to be doing a task.

"Mommy doesn't like shoes in the house," stated Issy as she looked down at Alex's feet.

Alex looked down at her own feet at this. She was wearing her beloved black motorcycle boots. They had been her first purchase since getting out of Litchfield. They reminded her of the pair she had years ago.

"Oh," she murmured in reply before slowly bending down and proceeded to take them off.

As Alex did so, Piper came down the hallway. Her heels pounded against the wooden floors of the apartment as she slowly approached the front door. She couldn't help but check out Alex's ass as the brunette had it up in the air like that. Her body was in even better shape than it had been when they had first met. Alex was aging very well, thought Piper to herself.

Alex turned slowly to meet Piper's eye as she straightened her back and nervously tugged down on her sweatshirt which had risen slightly up.

"Hi."

"Hi."

An awkward silence fell between them as their eyes locked, blue meeting green in intensity. They were both nervous, and their hearts were beating rapidly as they continued to get lost in each others eyes.

Alex smiled slightly as Piper was the first to look away. It always seemed to be a staring contest between them. They would look at each other until someone broke eye contact. Piper was usually the first. Alex took this moment to take in the sight of the blonde. Her eyes roamed down her body.

Piper had her blonde hair down which curled slightly at the ends. She was wearing a white blouse underneath a fitted black blazer. On her legs, she was wearing fitted black trousers. Alex had never seen Piper look so grown up than she did at this moment. Piper was in her middle ages now, but she still always thought of her as that 22-year-old Smith grad looking for a job. She hadn't gotten to know this new business lady Piper.

Alex found herself licking her lips slightly. She couldn't help but like what she saw.

"Thanks for doing this," spoke Piper, breaking Alex's thoughts.

Alex blinked as she came back to reality and looked up at Piper again. "Yeah, no biggie."

But they both knew that that wasn't true. It was a big deal. It was a fucking big deal. Issy was the whole reason that Alex had ended their relationship. Her agreeing to babysit the girl, now four years after, was a fucking big deal.

Piper just looked on at Alex for a second longer before launching into a list of things. "There is a list of numbers on the fridge in case anything happens. My cell number is there too. I shouldn't be that long. Probably three hours or so tops."

Alex just nodded her head and tried to keep up with what Piper was saying.

"There is money on the kitchen counter for the movie and food. Issy usually wants popcorn and one of those Slush Puppy drinks. The grape one is her favourite...She will talk your ear off during the movie..." Piper tucked her blonde hair behind her ears as she tired to think of what to say. "The movie is only about an hour and a half or so. The theatre is just down the block. I figured you guys could walk...but I can leave you money for a cab. I know it's raining outside."

"Walking is fine," replied Alex.

Piper studied Alex's face before nodding her head in understanding. "Okay," she let out a deep breath as if she were relieved that Alex would walk.

"Okay, I think that's it," whispered Piper as she looked over her shoulder as if what she was forgetting to tell Alex was lingering in the air behind her. She just couldn't help but feel aflutter by everything.

"Ok," replied Alex as she nodded her head and shoved her hands into the pockets of her hoodie.

Their eyes continued to linger on each other's faces before Piper realized the time. She really had to get going. "Thank you so much again," she whispered towards Alex before turning her attention on to Issy, who was still standing by the front door.

"Issy," began Piper.

"Yes, Mommy," answered Issy sweetly to her mother.

"You're to be a good girl for Alex and not to give her any of your sass, understand?" Piper raised her eyebrows at Issy at this.

"Understand," Issy stated back. She nodded her head vigorously at Piper.

Piper then smiled at Issy before running a hand through her hair and kissed her crown.

"I love you."

"I love you too," Issy whispered back as she smiled up at Piper.

Piper than turned her attention onto Alex again. A small smile was exchanged between the two women. "Well, I should be going," whispered Piper as she gestured to the front door.

Alex didn't say anything. She just nodded her head at Piper.

"You're sure...you're okay with...this?"

"I'm here, aren't I?" asked Alex, a slight smirk appearing on her face as she cocked an eyebrow at Piper.

Piper just stared wide-eyed at Alex before blushing slightly in embarrassment. Her question had been stupid, but she still was scared about leaving. She trusted Alex, but she didn't want her daughter getting hurt by a old grudge that Alex had.

"Yes, I'm okay with this," replied Alex in a soft voice. She realized that Piper just needed reinsurance. She was leaving her with the most important thing in her life, her daughter. Yes, Alex and her had history, but she was practically a stranger to Issy.

Piper nodded her head and ran a hand through her hair. She continued to stand there looking at Alex for a moment or two longer before moving past her and to the door. "I shouldn't be late," she whispered as she slowly opened the door and turned once again to look at Alex.

Alex slowly nodded her head.

"Okay."

"Bye, Mommy!" cried out Issy, breaking the tension between the two women.

"Bye, baby," whispered Piper as her eyes fell away from Alex and onto her daughter. She smiled warmly at the four-year-old. She then reached for her purse and umbrella which were lying on the floor by the coat rack. She gave a small wave goodbye as she looked between Alex and Issy before leaving the apartment.

Alex waited until the door was closed before looking down at Issy. She was suddenly nervous but for a different reason this time. She hadn't babysat since she was at least fifteen or so.

She didn't know really how to handle a kid.

Issy just stared back up at Alex as if challenging her in a way.

"What now?" she asked.

xxx

Both Issy and Alex were drenched as they came back into the apartment. It was a little later now, and they were just now getting back from the movie.

"Fuck," swore Alex underneath her breath as she closed the front door behind her and let out a shiver. Yes, the walk to the theatre had been short like Piper had said, but she hadn't been expecting it to be pissing down buckets when they got out.

"That's a bad word," spoke Issy as she looked up at Alex.

Alex looked down at the child as if seeing her for the first time. She hadn't meant for her to hear that. "I know. You shouldn't say it," she whispered in reply to the little girl. She gave her an apologetic smile before looking away.

They stood there a moment before Alex began to help Issy out of her wet rain jacket and boots. After hanging up the jacket and lining the boots on the mat by the door, Alex shed off her own wet clothes and boots.

"Now what?" asked Alex as she looked down at the little girl.

Issy just looked back at Alex and shrugged her shoulders. "I dunno!"

Alex couldn't help but smirk at Issy. She was a cute kid, she had to admit. She had fun today. More fun than she had in years it seemed. The kid had talked throughout most of the movie like Piper had predicted she would. But it hadn't really bothered Alex. She found it refreshing to see the world from a child's point of view. And the movie wasn't as bad as she thought it would be either.

It had been a while since she had been to the movies or seen a Disney film for that matter.

Today was filled with many firsts for her.

Like right now as Issy's face all the sudden broke out into a smile and reached for Alex's hand. The little girl was clearly overcome with some sort of idea. She led her down the hallway towards where the bedrooms were. Alex thought they were headed to Issy's room again.

This time, they turned to the right and headed to another room. A room Alex had never seen before and felt like she shouldn't see.

It was Piper's bedroom.

Alex pulled away from Issy and stopped in the threshold of the room. She couldn't go in there. This wasn't right, she thought. "Come on, kid," spoke Alex to Issy, trying to get her out of the room. "I don't think your mom would want us in here...come on...let's go in your room or something."

She was trying to think of anything to get the kid of the room. However, Issy was ignoring her. The little girl was smiling at Alex as she jumped up and down on the unmade bed.

"Come!" whispered Alex to the girl, gesturing for her to follow.

But again Issy did not listen to Alex. The four-year-old didn't what see the big deal was. Issy was always coming into Piper's bedroom. She was allowed in here.

Alex continued to watch Issy bounce for a moment or two longer before nervously shoving her hands into the pocket of her jeans and looking slowly around the room. The bedroom was slightly basked in darkness. There were a few pieces of clothing on the floor. Piper wouldn't have left it in such a state if she had known that Alex would be standing like she was now, looking in.

The walls were a soft grey colour, and the furniture was slightly mix matched. Her green eyes continued to scan over the contents of the room for a moment longer, taking in the framed pictures that lined one of the walls to the knick-knacks on the dresser. There was one thing that stood out to her. It was a small figurine of an elephant made out of stone. Alex remembered that elephant well. She had bought it for Piper at a small market stand in Turkey. It was supposed to bring good luck or something. Or so the merchant had said.

Before Alex could stop herself, she was walking into the room and over to the dresser. She couldn't believe that Piper still had it. She would have thought that Piper would have thrown out everything from their past life together. She surely hadn't kept much of Piper after she had abandoned her in Paris. Most of it had been thrown out the hotel window and onto the streets if she remembered correctly.

Alex didn't realize she had an audience as she picked up the elephant and clenched it into her hand.

"Mommy got that from Turkey. That's a country. Not the bird," explained Issy as she continued to bounce on the bed.

Alex who was still holding the elephant in her hand turned to look at the little girl.

"Have you ever been to Turkey?" Issy asked.

Alex couldn't help but smile slightly at the little girl at this. She stared down briefly at the elephant before looking back up at her.

"Sure have, kid."

Issy stopped bouncing at this. She stood on the bed with her hands on her hips as she continued to look on at Alex. "My Mommy has traveled all _over_ the world! One day I'm going to travel too."

Alex just gazed on at the little girl for a moment. It was amazing how much Piper was in this little body. Piper had always had a sense of adventure. She always loved when Alex had to go somewhere new for her job, and she took her with her. Yes, what they had been doing was illegal and had ended them both in Litchfield. But Alex knew that if Piper could do it all over again, she would. And Alex would too.

Those had been good times.

"Are you?" asked Alex as she placed the elephant back onto the dresser.

"Yep!" answered Issy with a firm nod of her head. She then suddenly got off of the bed and began to look for something on the bookshelf by the bed.

Alex just stood there in the room, watching the child. She felt awkward standing there. Especially when there was a pale pink bra hanging on the doorknob of the closet, just a few feet from where she stood. She could imagine the blonde walking around in just that as she got ready for her day... Her cheeks flushed as butterflies fluttered in the pit of her stomach at this sudden thought. It had been so clear. So vivid. It scared her.

She rubbed the side of her face as she looked away from the bra and over to Issy, who was now seated on the bed again. She had an album of sorts on her lap.

"Look," she whispered to Alex and gestured for her to come near. She wanted to show Alex something.

Alex hesitated at first but slowly found curiosity getting the better of her again. It didn't take her long to enclose the space from where she stood to the edge of the bed. She found herself taking a seat beside Issy.

Issy then thrust the album onto Alex's lap. "This is Mommy's scrapbook," she whispered. Her voice was hot against Alex's ear as she snuggled closer to her.

Alex's eyes blazed down onto the album. She ran her hands over the brown worn leather of the cover. This was the first time she was seeing it in years. She couldn't believe that Piper had kept it.

Piper had started the scrapbook just after there first trip together. She had wanted something to remember their adventures together. After each trip and new country visited the scrapbook got a little fatter. There were four years worth of memories in it.

Alex didn't know if she wanted to go down that memory lane. She didn't know if she could handle the pain of it all. For she knew when the scrapbook ended. It ended on a very dark note. One she didn't know if she could relive again. It still brought a deep pain to her when she thought about that day when her world had gone black.

However, Issy wasn't giving her much of a choice as to whether she wanted to open it or not. The four-year-old climbed onto Alex's lap and began to open the heavy album. There wasn't much to look at on the first page except for a piece of paper that read "_Scrapbook Of Adventures_" in Piper's looped handwriting. Underneath this title was a date, _October 29th 2003 to..._

Alex remembered clearly Piper writing this out. She had asked the blonde when the adventures would end. Piper had just answered simply that the adventures would never end and would go on forever.

Issy didn't stay long on this page. She couldn't read what it said, so she wasn't interested. She then flipped to the next page, which was filled with pictures.

Alex once again felt butterflies flutter in her stomach as she stared down at the photos. It had been so long since she had seen them. The first picture was of them together seated on a bench somewhere on the Smith campus. It was the first picture they had ever taken together. It was a little unfocused, but there were smiles plastered on both of their faces. Piper looked to be in mid-laugh. Alex couldn't remember what she had said to Piper at the moment she had decided to take the photo.

The next photo beside it was again taken on the Smith campus. There was a snowy landscape in the background. Alex remembered this one well. It had been taken just before Christmas. Piper was once again laughing into the camera as Alex kissed her cheek.

And so the rest of the pictures went in chronological order.

As Alex continued to scan the pictures, she couldn't help but think of how happy they were back then, how young they were, how stupidly in love they had been.

It didn't dawn on Issy until about the fourth page in that the woman with her mother was Alex.

The little girl studied a snapshot of Alex that Piper had dedicated a whole page to. Alex had her hair done up in her signature pin-up hair style. Her green eyes blazed into the camera. There was an amused expression on her face. She held an unopened bottle of champagne in one of her hands and empty flute in the other. It had been taken the night of Alex's housewarming party. She had just bought herself a lavish penthouse loft in Manhattan and had thrown herself a lavish party to go with it. That had just been before Alex had taken Piper on their first real adventure across the ocean together.

Issy looked at the picture for a second longer before glancing up at Alex. Alex stared back at the little girl.

"That's you," stated Issy as she pointed down at the picture.

Alex thought about lying, but she figured what was the point. She just nodded her head as she adjusted her glasses.

"It is," she whispered as she looked away from Issy and studied the picture. This Alex Vause staring out at her was a much different girl than she was now. First off, Alex was no longer a girl. She was a grown middle-aged woman. Second, this photo captured a very confident person who had the world at her feet. She had everything going for her. Alex pretended to be this person, but she couldn't. Too much had happened over the last twenty years. She had lost her one true rock in her life, her mom. She had her heart broken more times than she liked to admit by the same woman. She had battled an addiction. She had served time in prison. She had seen someone she loved deeply get abused. She had seen that same person hurt her own self because of it. She had abused someone in the process of protecting them.

Lots of good and bad and fucked-up shit had happened to her since that picture had been taken.

Issy then turned the page again on Alex. The next page contained a picture of Alex and Piper together. They were in Prague. It was again taken at a time when they both thought they had the world at their feet and life had been great. It was before Alex had asked Piper to carry a suitcase full of drug money for her. Alex had her arms tightly around Piper and her chin resting on her shoulder. Someone else had taken the picture this time. Alex couldn't remember who though.

"Where you wezbeein together?"

Alex couldn't help but snort with laughter at how she pronounced lesbian. She smiled at Issy before nodding her head slightly in response.

Issy traced the picture with her fingers. "Did you love my mommy?" she asked as she slowly looked up at Alex again.

Alex could feel the tears welling up in her eyes but blinked them away as she looked over at Issy.

"Yes."

And she still did, she thought.

xxx

The apartment was quiet as Piper entered it and shut the door behind her. It was a little too quiet for her liking as she leaned her umbrella against the wall and quickly took off her shoes. She then next hung up her purse on one of the hooks of the coat rack before proceeding further into the apartment.

"I'm HOME!" she called out as she walked down the hallway and towards Issy's room, where she figured Alex and her daughter were.

"What the...?" her voice trailed off as she noticed her bedroom door was open and heard a little fairy-like voice coming from it. She immediately turned to her right and headed towards her room.

She pursed her lips as she stood in the threshold looking in on the sight of Alex seated on the edge of her bed with Issy in her lap. She cursed underneath her breath as she realized what they were looking at.

Piper had long ago hidden the scrapbook away. There had been so many times when she had wanted to burn it but had never had the courage to go through with it. She had always kept it out of sight though, buried away in her closet or something. It wasn't until recently that she had gotten it out and looked at it. She hadn't known that Issy knew about it.

It was at this that Issy looked up at her mother. "MOMMY!" cried out the little girl as she jumped off of Alex's lap and came running towards her.

"Hey, baby," whispered Piper as she lifted her daughter up and hugged her. She knew it wouldn't be much longer before she wouldn't be able to pick her daughter up like this. And she knew she would miss it. She loved the feeling that she got when she felt the small warm body against her own. Feeling the beating of her child's heart.

Alex slowly closed the scrapbook and stood up. She was overcome with nerves at being caught in Piper's bedroom.

Piper planted a kiss on the side of her daughter's face before looking over at Alex.

Their eyes locked immediately at each other.

Alex couldn't read the expression on Piper's face. She couldn't figure out if she was mad or not. She tilted her head slightly to the side as she cocked an eyebrow.

"Did you have a good time at the movies?" asked Piper as she looked away from Alex and addressed her daughter.

Issy nodded her head and began to talk Piper's ear off about the movie and what had happened. Piper smiled and replied when needed to her daughter. She then kissed her cheek again before putting the little girl down.

"Why don't you go play in your room for a bit while Mommy talks to Alex, okay?" she asked.

Issy glanced over her shoulder at Alex before looking back up at Piper. She nodded her head slightly before being ushered out of the room by Piper.

Once Issy was out of earshot, Piper turned her attention onto Alex.

"Look, I'm sorry," blurted out Alex. "I didn't mean to come in here and..." she then gestured to the scrapbook she still had in her hands. She felt extremely guilty for invading Piper's space like this. If the blonde had ever did that to her she would be pissed off.

Piper was silent for a moment as she continued to look on at Alex. She then took a small step further into the room and closer to Alex.

Piper wasn't really angry that Alex was in her bedroom. She knew that she should be. But she wasn't. Not in the way that she should be. She was more just saddened by the awkward tension that was thick in the air.

Their eyes continued to blaze into one another before Alex spoke.

"I can't believe you fucking kept this," whispered Alex as she once again looked down at the scrapbook. And it was the truth. She couldn't believe that Piper had kept the stupid scrapbook after all these years.

Piper just shrugged her shoulders like it was no big deal. "I thought about getting rid of it, but I put a lot of effort into it, and I dunno...that was a good part of my life...I wanted to remember it...I guess..."

"We did have some good times..." admitted Alex as she looked back up at Piper and smirked slightly.

Piper couldn't help but return the smile.

Another blanket of silence fell over them for a moment or two longer before Piper took another step towards Alex. "I'm sorry if Issy gave you a hard time or what not. She just really likes you and doesn't know when to stop asking questions. "

"She's a kid, I get it..."replied Alex. All kids she knew asked questions. "It's okay."

Piper once again nodded her head. She couldn't help but feel a little confused by this though. She wasn't used to Alex being so nice to her like this. She would have thought that she would be pissed off or something by now.

"Why don't you hate me?" she asked.

Alex cocked an eyebrow at this. She was taken aback by this question. "Look, Pipes. I have spent a lot of time hating you. Four years worth. But I'm trying to move past it. It's hard for me, but I'm trying. It's like you said before, our paths are going to cross...they have already crossed multiple times now...I don't know what to fucking do about us, but maybe we should try being friends...it would be easier...on everyone..." Her voice trailed off slightly as she continued to look deeply into Piper's eyes. It was the first time that she felt like she was being honest with her. Yes, she had hated Piper and still did. But she also knew that she loved her. They had never been friends before, but maybe they needed to start trying? Because neither of them were going away anytime soon. Their lives, no matter how much they hated it, were connected. They had two friends in common, and they couldn't get away from that fact.

Piper just looked at Alex for a second. She hadn't been expecting that. She still wasn't used to having Alex be nice to her. She didn't deserve it really. She had fucking abandoned the girl and cheated on her. She didn't deserve Alex being nice to her and offering to babysit her daughter like she had today. A heavy sigh escaped from the blonde's lips as she ran a hand through her hair and looked away from Alex.

She bit down on her lower lip for a second as she looked on at her bra hanging from the doorknob. She could feel her cheeks flushing in embarrassment at this. She prayed that Alex had noticed it.

She then slowly looked back at Alex, who was smirking.

"What?"

"Yes, I have seen the bra," teased Alex as if reading Piper's thoughts.

Piper once again found her cheeks flushing at this. She continued to look at Alex for a second before rolling her eyes slightly and smiling at the other woman. She could feel a warmth in the pit of her stomach as Alex continued to look at her like that.

It then felt all too intimate for her, having Alex standing in her bedroom like this.

Alex, who sensed this, put the scrapbook on the bed and nervously adjusted on her glasses on her nose.

"I should get going," she whispered as her green eyes locked with Piper's blue ones.

Piper nodded her head slowly at this. She wanted to say something but didn't know what to say. She didn't want Alex to go. She then found the words spilling out of her mouth before she could stop herself.

"Do you want to stay for dinner?"

Alex cocked an eyebrow at this. She didn't know how to respond to this. She was split down the middle. A part of her desperately wanted to stay for dinner and not have to face going back to the empty house. But another part of her wasn't ready to take that step from hating Piper to being her friend. Yes, she had said they should start being friends, but it felt too soon.

A moment of silence fell between them as Alex tried to make up her mind. She really didn't have anywhere else to be, and she didn't feel like being alone, again. The company would be nice, she thought. She tilted her head to the side as she adjusted her glasses and looked on at the blonde.

"Are you sure?" she asked. She needed to know that Piper really wanted her to stay and wasn't just asking to be polite.

Piper nodded her head. She was most definitely sure that she wanted Alex to stay for dinner. If they were going to be friends now...they needed to try...right? she thought. "It's just an invitation, Alex. You don't have to if you don't want to. I'm probably just going to order a pizza or something.."

Alex found herself agreeing to stay for dinner.

She wanted to.

Plus the promise of pizza sounded way better than anything she would end up making herself.

* * *

><p>Thanks for reading and don't forget to review!<p>

Julie


	12. Chapter 11

Do not own Orange Is the New Black or any of the characters.

Thanks so much for the overwhelming love on the last chapter. :) This will be a short chapter.

* * *

><p><span><strong>Rainstorms<strong>

_**Chapter 11**_

_Wren_

_October 2021_

"Give me one of those," said Nicky as she took a seat beside Alex on the steps of the front porch.

Alex cast a sideways glance at the bushy blonde before pulling out a cigarette from the pack in her hand and handing it to Nicky. "Since when do you smoke?" asked Alex in surprise as she pulled out a cigarette for herself and lit it.

"Since when do you?" Nicky asked back, cocking an eyebrow at Alex.

Alex didn't reply right away as she took a long drag from the cigarette and blew a ring of smoke out a moment later. She just shrugged her shoulders as she looked back over at Nicky. She didn't have a definite answer. She had smoked as a teen but quit in her early twenties.

Nicky just smirked at her as she placed the cigarette between her lips and lit it.

A comforting silence then fell over the two friends as they looked out onto the street and continued to smoke. "Don't tell Lorna though," joked Nicky as she looked over at Alex and met her eye. "She doesn't like it when I smoke."

Alex couldn't help but smirk as she flicked the ashes of her cigarette onto the sidewalk. "Your secret is safe with me, Nichols."

The two friends grinned at each other before once again basking in the silence. It was a surprisingly warm October day as the two woman sat there in just long-sleeve shirts and jeans.

"So, what's up with you and Chapman?" Nicky asked a few moments later after finishing her cigarette and tossing it onto the sideway in front of her. Nicky turned towards Alex with an amused look on her face and wagged her eyebrows at Alex.

Alex frowned at this. She knew that Nicky knew about the other night, but that didn't mean she was ready to fucking talk about it. She still didn't know what to make of it herself. She took a long drag from her cigarette before flicking the remainder of it onto the sidewalk like Nicky had done, previously.

"Nothing," replied Alex with a shrug of her shoulders. And it was the truth: there was nothing really going on between her and Piper. Yes, they had dinner together. Yes, it had been nice. She guessed they could be considered friends?, she still wasn't sure. It had only been a few days now, and she hadn't seen her since.

"It's never nothing with the two of you," said Nicky. And it was the truth. It was never nothing between Piper and Alex. Since Day one at Litchfield, it had been something. It had been the best dyke drama Nicky had ever seen.

Alex didn't say anything as she leaned forward, resting her elbows on her knees and looking out onto the street. There was a group of kids playing just a few houses over, and their chatter and laughter rang over to where the two friends were seated. The brunette watched them for a moment longer before looking over at Nicky, who was still smirking at her. "What?" she asked with an edge to her tone. She didn't see why Nicky couldn't drop it for once?

"Nothing," replied Nicky with a shrug of her shoulders as her face broke out into a slightly different smirk. "I was just thinking about what Lorna was making for dinner. Hopefully it's taco night tonight."

She wanted to break the sudden tension that had fallen between them.

Alex just stared at the other woman for a second before her face broke out into a small grin. "I dunno. I heard it's beef and noodles," she answered back.

The two friends continued to smile at each other. They both remembered this moment in their relationship well. It was the first time that Alex had ever let her walls down in front of someone since arriving at Litchfield, and Nicky had turned out to be someone that Alex would count on multiple times at the prison. And that was saying a lot. Alex Vause didn't let anyone just in.

* * *

><p><em>December 2019<em>

It was Christmas time yet again at Litchfield.

Alex couldn't believe it was that time of year again...not that it had gone quickly. More because of how slowly it had gone by. Time in Litchfield was different from the time in the outside world. Every day was the same, and time just bled into one long period. It was like being in a fish bowl; you were just constantly swimming around in a circle.

Alex hated this time of year and not just because she was spending it in prison. She had always hated the holiday. Growing up, she had always been disappointed by the magical day. Each year, she would write Santa asking for the latest toys that she knew all her classmates would be getting. However, she never got what she wanted underneath the tree even though her mother, rest her soul, had always tried her best to provide Alex with a good Christmas each year.

It just made her realise how poor they were. And that made her angry as a child, knowing that her mother struggled at times while everyone else threw their money away like it was nothing.

To say the least, she hated the holidays. Especially at Litchfield when she couldn't help but think about a certain blonde each time the fucking day came around.

So much had happened on that first Christmas she had been at Litchfield. Her heart had been aching over Piper and the blonde's choice to be with Larry instead of her. Piper had yet again broken her heart. She had hated the blonde. She had hated herself for allowing for this to happen. For giving herself to the blonde again only to have her heart stomped on. And then, she hadn't been there for Piper when she had come to her upset. If only she hadn't allowed her anger to take over, could she have seen that something was wrong? That Piper wasn't just being her yuppy, self-centred self. That something had truly freaked her out, a.k.a Pennsatucky.

If only she hadn't been too busy letting Nicky fuck her that night, she could have seen Piper leave the chapel that night and head out onto the grounds. If she had just been there for the blonde, she might have been able to stop her from smashing in the bible-thumper's face. Piper wouldn't have ended up in the SHU and lost herself.

Alex still wondered how things would have turned out if Piper hadn't gone through all that she had during her time in Litchfield. Alex wondered whether she would have forgiven her if the blonde had never been hurt the way that she had within those prison walls. She wondered if they would have ended up back together like they did.

She knew there was no point in really thinking about all this. It was in the past, six years ago in fact. But she couldn't stop herself from wondering sometimes when it was late at night and she was having trouble sleeping.

Alex had tried to bring it up with Wren sometimes, but she didn't get it. Wren didn't understand why Alex was still upset about what had happened to her ex-girlfriend so many years ago now. Especially with someone who had broken her heart more times than she liked to count. But Piper wasn't just someone. She stubbornly held a place in Alex's heart no matter how hard she tried to get rid of her feelings for her. She couldn't help but love Piper deep down.

Alex could see why Wren didn't like when she talked about Piper. They were supposed to be in love. Well, Wren thought they were. Alex still wasn't sure what she felt for Wren. She liked her. But she wasn't in-love with her. Not like she had been with Piper.

Wren was just supposed to be someone to fuck and pass the time with. They weren't supposed to be in love or be anything serious like Wren seemed to think they were. They were in fucking prison for God-sake. Wren would be getting out soon anyways. She promised that she would come visit every week like Piper had. But Alex knew she wouldn't. And she didn't want her to.

She knew that once someone left Litchfield and entered the real world, they stopped thinking about the ones that got left behind. Piper had forgotten about her and turned to her ex for comfort.

Nicky still visited though, which was nice. But it wasn't as often as it used to be at the beginning. Nicky had her own life. She had Lorna and her job as a florist to keep her busy. And although she didn't talk about it, Alex knew that someone else had taken a permanent spot in Nicky's life: a little girl.

A little girl who Alex had never met and had no plans on meeting ever. However, she had seen pictures. Red still kept in touch with Piper through letters and got sent a picture of the tyke every now and then. Red had never told her who the little girl displayed on the walls of her bunk was, but she didn't have to. Alex knew that face anywhere.

It was Piper through and through.

* * *

><p><em>October 2021<em>

"Vause!?"

Alex was standing in the express line at the grocery store when she heard someone call her name. She looked up from her phone where she had been texting Nicky and over at the cashier.

"VAUSE! Oh. My. God!"

Alex just stared at the cashier for a second before suddenly realizing who she was. "Wren?" she asked as she adjusted her glasses on the bridge of her nose and locked eyes with her ex-prison-girlfriend. She couldn't believe that it was her. She hadn't seen Wren in over a year. Alex had thought that she'd gone back to live with her family in Rhode Island.

Wren, for her part, just continued to smile at Alex as she rang in her items. She had her honey brown locks pulled back into a pony tail and was dressed in her work uniform of a white t-shirt, jeans, and a green smock. "The one and only!" she answered back, her hazel eyes gleaming with amusement as Alex continued to stare at her in clear disbelief.

"What are you fucking doing here?" Alex asked after a moment had passed and the shock of seeing her had worn off slightly.

"I work here!" stated Wren, pointing out the obvious to Alex.

Alex couldn't help but roll her eyes and smile at that. "I can fucking see that you work here. I meant, like what are you doing in the city, I thought you were going back to your folks' place in Rhode Island."

"Oh, I was there for a bit after getting out, but I ended up moving back to the city a few months ago and am now living the glamorous life as a cashier," Wren explained as she finished ringing in the last of Alex's items. "And you? When did you get out?"

"April," answered Alex in a low voice. She looked down slightly in sudden shyness.

"So you're a newbie to the world!" Wren grinned towards Alex.

Alex just shrugged her shoulders and smiled slightly in response. She guessed that she was a newbie to the world. She did feel like she had just been born yesterday sometimes. The world had changed dramatically over the eight years that she had spent inside Litchfield.

"So what are you up to now?"

"Um, I'm a maid..."

"Can't get away from those washing machines, huh?" Wren winked playfully at Alex as she began to bag her stuff.

Alex once again found herself smiling at Wren. She might have never been in love with this beauty before her, but that didn't mean she had never really liked her. "No, it doesn't seem like I can," she admitted sadly.

The two ex-lovers continued to catch up and flirt slightly with each other for a few moments longer before Alex paid for her groceries and took her bag from Wren's hands. Their hands touch briefly, sending a wave of chills down Alex' s spine.

Alex's green eyes stared intensely back at Wren for a moment before she found the words coming out of her mouth. "When do you get off?"

Wren smiled wildly at this. This was music to her ears.

"Nine!" she answered.

Alex returned the smile before once again adjusting her glasses on her nose and nodding her head slightly.

"I'll be here."

xxx

It was raining softly against the bay window of the apartment. It was late now as Alex pulled down her shirt and proceed to put on her leather jacket.

"We should do this again, sometime. It was fun," spoke Wren with that wicked smile of hers, playing out on her face. The younger woman was leaning seductively against the doorframe of the bedroom. She had her arms crossed over her bare chest as she looked on at Alex. She was still completely naked from their activities earlier.

Alex smirked at this. It had been fun. Sex with Wren was always good. She had to admit she missed it a little. She hadn't been with anyone else since Wren had left Litchfield. She nodded her head in agreement to the younger woman. "We most fucking should do this again..." she whispered as she did up the zipper of her leather jacket and locked eyes with Wren.

The two woman stared deeply at each other for a moment longer before Wren enclosed the space between them. She licked her lips as she wrapped her arms around Alex's neck and kissed her with raw passion.

Alex's hands immediatly went to Wren's waist as she responded to the kiss.

* * *

><p>And the plot thickens...<p>

Thanks for reading and leave a review if you feel like it.

Julie


	13. Chapter 12

Do not own Orange Is the New Black or any of the characters.

So, I don't normally do this but here is another chapter for you guys. I know, two in one day...wow! But I felt like I owed you guys, my readers for the last chapter. I promise, if you just stick with me for a little while longer than you won't be disappointed... ;)

I had fun writing this chapter for multiple reasons.

Enjoy!

* * *

><p><span><strong>Rainstorms<strong>

_**Chapter 12**_

_Scary Ex-Girlfriends and Tinkerbell_

_October 2021_

"Mommy, where's your costume?" Issy asked her mother as she came into Piper's bedroom.

Piper glanced over her shoulder and smiled at Issy. "I'm wearing it."

The little girl gave Piper a once-over, frowning at what she saw. "Mommy, that's not a proper costume!"

Piper, who was in the middle of making her bed, looked once again over at her daughter and smiled. "Sure, it is," she answered glancing down at her outfit. She was wearing a red flannel shirt tucked into a pair of blue jeans. She had a cowboy hat to go with her outfit too. "I'm a cow-girl!"

Issy once again frowned at her mother. That was not a costume in Issy's opinion. Costumes came from the store, not from your closet. "Noooo, it isn't!" cried the little girl, shaking her head slightly. "That's what you wear on Saturdays!"

Piper couldn't help but laugh at this. It was what she could be found wearing on most Saturdays, this was true. "Yes, it is! But if I add a hat," she then reached for the felted cow-boy hat she had resting on her nightstand, "Then I become a cow-girl!"

Piper did a little pose at this and smiled warmly at her daughter.

The four-year-old looked unimpressed by Piper's little trick. "Noo, you are still wearing your Saturday clothes...just with a cow-boy hat on. That doesn't make you a cow-girl, Mommy. You need a horse!"

Piper didn't know whether to laugh or sigh at this. Her daughter was a hard one to please sometimes. She didn't just accept things like other kids her age did. Polly's son Finn at her age would accept anything that Piper said to him. He was a much more easy-going than Issy seemed to be.

"Well, not everyone can go as such a pretty Tinkerbell like you!" commented Piper as she looked down at her daughter with adoration. She had thought that Issy would have wanted to go trick-or-treating as Rapunzel, but the four-year-old had changed her mind at the last minute and picked out the Tinkerbell dress that Carol had bought her when they had gone to Disney World earlier this year. Piper and her mother might not get along all the time, but Carol did have a soft spot for her granddaughter. And Issy was very fond of her Nana too.

Issy smiled as she looked down at herself. The costume was a green dress that came in at the hips and the skirt was made up of different layers which created the impression of leaves settled on top of one another. The four-year-old had her blonde hair up in a bun on top of her head and a set of wings at her back. Issy's dress had short sleeves, so Piper had made Issy wear a white turtle neck underneath it. It was supposed to be mild that evening, and Issy had refused to wear a coat over top of the dress, so this was a compromise. Piper didn't need the little girl to catch a cold.

xxx

"Will you be my bride?" Nicky playfully asked Lorna in her best monster voice.

Lorna met Nicky's brown eyes in the mirror and smiled. "Yes," she answered before going back to carefully applying dark kohl around her eyes.

Nicky continued to watch Lorna for a second longer before looking at her own appearance in the mirror of the vanity. The couple was getting ready to go out trick-or-treating with Piper and Issy. They were going as Frankenstein and his bride. Lorna had wanted to go as something romantic, but it was Nicky's turn this year to pick their annual Halloween costumes, and she wanted to go as something classic but scary.

Nicky was impressed by her appearance. Lorna had painted her whole face green. Her eyelids were covered in dark purple eye shadow, giving her a dead look. There were small red cuts and lines over her face, giving the illusion that she had been sewn together. She also had two bolts sticking out the sides of her neck, and her bushy hair had been kept in its natural state, giving her Frankenstein look a little uniqueness. The rest of her costume consisted of a black t-shirt and a over-sized black suit jacket and pants. On her feet she planned on wearing a pair of chucky heeled boots to give her a little height.

Lorna was wearing a long-sleeved, floor-length laced wedding dress with a train and high collar. Like Nicky, she kept her hair natural though she had teased it up into a beehive of sorts. The only other alterations were two zigzag white lines running up the sides of it. Her make-up was pale and deadly looking with dark circles around the eyes like Nicky's. She had also managed to draw a few red stitches along her jaw line and up to her ears, giving the appearance she had been sewn together too. Lorna's lips were painted their signature fire-truck red color, completing her ghoulish appearance.

Nicky had to admit they looked good. If there was going to be a costume contest that night, they would win it for sure, she thought as she continued to look into the mirror with a smirk.

xxx

"Coming!" Alex called out as she walked quickly down the hallway towards the front door. She held a bowl of candy in one of her hands as she approached the door and opened it.

"TRICK OR TREAT!" called out Issy with a bright smile on her face as she held out her plastic pumpkin pail.

Alex couldn't help but smile down at the little girl. "And who do we have here?" she asked as she adjusted the bowl in her hand so that it was resting on her hip.

"I'm Tinkerbell!" replied Issy, who was very pleased with herself.

"Wow!" replied back Alex as she continued to look down at the little girl, before reaching for a handful of candy and filling Issy's empty pail. Nicky's and Lorna's house was their first stop that night.

"Thank you!" cried Issy as she stared down wide-eyed at the amount of candy that Alex had just given her.

Alex couldn't help but smirk at the look on the little girl's face. You would have thought she had just given her a million dollars in cash, not a handful of candy. Alex continued to look at the tiny blonde for a second longer before glancing up at Piper, who was just making her way up the steps of the house.

Piper caught her eye and smiled slightly in greeting.

"Howdy!" whispered Piper as she tilted the hat she was wearing slightly off of her head in greeting towards Alex.

"Howdy!" Alex replied back.

Neither spoke a word for a moment as they continued to look deeply at each other. They hadn't spoken or seen much of each other since the night that Alex had had dinner with them. It was still awkward between them no matter how much they wanted it to change and be friends. There was just so much unresolved energy between them for there not to be. They still had a lot to discuss, and until they really sat down to dish it all out, it would never fully change. One had to put the past behind them before they could move, and neither of them were ready to do so, just yet.

Issy looked between the two of them before breaking the silence. "Alex, where's your costume?" she asked in all seriousness as she looked over at Alex's outfit of skinny blue jeans and a blue checkered shirt. "Are you a cow-girl like Mommy?"

Alex tore her eyes away from Piper and looked down at her outfit. She hadn't given it much thought. She hadn't dressed up for Halloween in years. She shrugged her shoulders as she met Issy's eye, "Sure."

Issy just continued to look up at her before letting out a sigh. She was disappointed by Alex's answer. It seemed that like her mother Alex didn't know what a proper costume was.

Alex fused her eyebrows together in confusion at this before glancing over to Piper for help.

Piper just smiled a small smile at her. "Don't worry. She wasn't impressed with my costume either."

Alex tried to make sense of this but still didn't get it. She just shrugged her shoulders before holding the door open for the two of them to come inside. "Nicky and Lorna should be down soon. You should see their costumes."

"Oh, I know, they always go all-out!" Piper responded as she folded Issy's jean jacket over her arm. "You should have seen them last year."

"Why? What did they go as?" asked Alex as she closed the door and looked over at Piper, interested. She had never imagined that Nicky or Lorna would be so into Halloween. At Litchfield they hadn't really been allowed to dress-up.

"Lorna had gone to this fancy costume place where you rent out lavish costumes used in plays and musicals. And she had gotten these two Southern Belle dresses with the hoop skirts and everything. She and Nicky had gone as Scarlett O'Hara and Rhett's sister, Regina!"

Alex couldn't help but snort with laughter with this. "Regina?"

"Yeah, Nicky had come up with the name. Lorna had originally wanted her to go as Rhett Butler but Nicky refused to wear the moustache. So they had made up the story that Scarlett had fallen in love with Rhett's sister, Regina, and they had a wild love affair together," explained Piper as she recalled back to last year's Halloween. Larry had had Issy that night, so Piper had tagged along with the couple to a Halloween party that had been hosted by one of their friends. It had been fun. Piper had just started to see Stephen around that time, so they had gone as a nurse and a doctor. It hadn't been as creative as Lorna and Nicky's costume but still good, Piper had thought.

Alex couldn't help but let out a raspy chuckle at this. She would have loved to seen Nicky in a Southern Belle dress.

"Do you remember our first Halloween together?" asked Piper in a quiet voice to Alex after a moment of silence had fallen over them.

Alex couldn't help but smile at this. "Hell ya!"

The couple had actually first met a few days before Halloween back in 2003, but their first ever Halloween together as a couple had been a year after when they were in between travels. They had just arrived back in the States the day before from Prague. Alex had just wanted to stay in and sleep, but Piper had convinced her to go out to some party her friend was throwing. The couple - or more like Piper - had rushed around on the day trying to find last-minute costumes, and she had ended up finding two pink satin jackets at a thrift-shop. She had made Alex do her hair in that pin-up hairstyle she was always sporting and made the brunette wear a black short-sleeve blouse, a tight black pencil skirt, and red heels. She had been Rizzo from Grease. Piper, who curled and teased her blonde hair and worn tight shiny black leggings and a black tank-top, had gone as Sandy.

The two women held each other's eye for a second longer before hearing footsteps on the stairs. Both then looked to see Nicky and Lorna coming down.

"OH MY GOD!" cried out Piper as she took in the sight of her friends. "You guys look amazing!"

"Thanks," chimed both Nicky and Lorna at the same time in response.

"You look scary!" cried out Issy as she looked between Lorna and Nicky. The four-year-old was clearly impressed by their costumes.

"Thanks, Tinkerbell!" Nicky replied as she took in the little green fairy before her.

A look of pride bloomed on Issy's face at this. She was happy that Nicky knew who exactly who she was and had addressed it.

Nicky continued to look down at the little girl before glancing up at Piper. "What are you suppose to be, Chapman?"

"I'm a cow-girl!" Piper replied as she touched the rim of her hat. Wasn't it obvious? she wondered as she continued to look on at Nicky.

"That's one lame costume, Chapman. You did better last year when you went as a nurse!" commented Nicky.

Piper couldn't help but roll her eyes in response to this. She now saw where her daughter got it from. The four-year-old was clearly influenced by her Godmother.

xxx

"Are you coming trick-or-treating too?" asked Issy, peering up at Alex.

It was now ten minutes later, and the group was finally heading out.

Alex looked down at the little girl and shook her head. "Nope," she answered. Alex was staying back at the house to hand out candy to the neighbourhood kids. Plus, Wren was supposed to be stopping by. Alex still wasn't sure what she was doing with Wren. It had been over two weeks since they had hooked up at Wren's apartment. They had met up numerous times since then. But it wasn't like they were going out or anything. All they did was fuck, it seemed.

Just like their relationship at Litchfield had been like.

Wren, though, thought they were in some sort of serious relationship. Alex didn't feel the same way, but she had no plans to end it anytime soon. She liked Wren, and she liked having sex with her too. Being with Wren was her escape from everything else going on in her life...especially where things with Piper were concerned. As with everything else, Alex didn't know what to do about that either.

Alex had told Nicky about Wren but no one else, and she wanted it to stay like that. Things were already messy between her and Piper. If she found out about Wren, it wouldn't help matters at all. Especially now when they were trying to be friends.

Issy didn't look convinced by this answer. She wanted Alex to come out too. "Why not?" she asked, raising an eyebrow at Alex.

Alex couldn't help but smirk at the little girl's tiny facial gesture. That was her thing, she thought as she continued to look down at the four-year-old. "Because, kid, someone's got to hand out the candy."

Issy pondered this for a second before nodding her head slowly in approval of this answer.

Alex continued to smile at the little girl for a moment longer before there was a knock at the door.

Issy's face burst into a smile at this. Her brown eyes looked from Alex to the door and back. "Can I hand out the candy?" she asked in excitement.

"Sure, kid," she whispered as she handed the little girl the bowl.

Issy wrapped her arms over the sides of the bowl, holding it close to her body before walking slowly towards the door.

Alex watched her for a second before opening the door for the little blonde.

"Trick-or-treat!" cried out Wren in greeting as she locked eyes with Alex and smiled.

A look of shock appeared on Alex's face at this. She hadn't been expecting Wren so soon. She cocked an eyebrow as she continued to gawk at the other woman, "You're early!"

"I thought I would surprise you!" whispered Wren as she took a small step towards Alex and planted a wet kiss on her lips.

"You're too _old_ to be trick-or-treating!" Issy cried as she watched the two woman kiss. She did not like this one bit. Alex was supposed to be with her Mommy, not this stranger lady.

Wren tore her lips away from Alex and looked down at Issy at this. "Hi, there!" she said, greeting Issy with a smile.

Issy, who was still clenching the bowl of candy just frowned up at Wren.

"Who are you?"

"Wren, this is Issy, Nicky and Lorna's Goddaughter," explained Alex as she placed a hand on Issy's head and looked over at Wren.

Wren just looked on at Alex for a second in confusion before it dawned on her who Issy really was. She knew all about Alex's ex and how she had a daughter. She assumed that this little girl was it.

Alex just glared at Wren as if reading her thoughts. She begged her with her eyes not to say anything uncomfortable in front of the child.

Wren just smiled sweetly back at Alex. A little too sweetly for Alex's liking. She knew how Wren could get sometimes. That was one thing that Wren and Piper had a common. They didn't share Alex well with others.

"Well, aren't you going to invite me in?" asked Wren after a moment had passed.

Alex just let out a sigh before shrugging her shoulders slightly. There was really nothing else she could do but let her in. She just hoped that it wouldn't be awkward. She laughed slightly in her head at this. Who was she fucking kidding? Of course it was going to be fucking awkward.

It already fucking was.

"Issy, get your shoes on, we'll be leav...Hi?" Piper voice trailed off as she came down the hallway from the kitchen and noticed the newcomer. Her blue eyes looked on at Wren for a second before glancing over at Alex.

Alex nervously cleared her throat. "Um... Piper, this is Wren...Wren, this is Piper," Alex said to introduce the two women.

Wren's eyes were dark as they stared at Piper for a second, giving her the once-over. Wren knew all about Piper. She didn't need an introduction. She grinned wickedly at the blonde before sticking her hand out at her. "Hi!"

"Hi!" Piper replied back, as she shook Wren's hand. Despite the smiles, she could feel some animosity from the other woman though she didn't know what for. She didn't know who this Wren person was.

After the two women had shaken hands, Wren casually wrapped her arm around Alex's waist and smirked slightly at the blonde.

Piper fused her eyebrows slightly in confusion as she studied this gesture. Her eyes looked over to Alex, looking for some sort of explanation. She hadn't known that Alex had a girlfriend. She was feeling a mix of emotions at the moment it seemed.

Alex, however, didn't say anything in return to Piper as she continued to look on at her.

Piper looked away and down at her daughter. She then busied herself with getting Issy ready to leave. She took the bowl of candy from her and placed it down on the table by the door. She then began to help Issy put on her shoes, but the four-year-old wanted to take a stand against the jean jacket Piper had brought with her.

"Mommy, I don't want to wear that!" complained Issy as Piper tried to put it on her.

"Issy, it's cold outside," explained Piper to the little girl.

Issy made a slight face at this but didn't put up a fight like she usually did. "What about my wings?" She couldn't put the jacket on with her wings attached to her back.

Piper sighed at this. The wings were in the way.

Just then Nicky and Lorna came to join the group by the door. Nicky couldn't help but smirk in amusement at seeing Wren. She hadn't met her, but she could only assume who the tall woman standing beside Alex was. Nicky caught Alex's eye and smiled. Oh, how she had missed Vauseman drama.

Alex just frowned back at Nicky. She knew what her friend was thinking.

"Hey, you must be Wren! I'm Nicky!" the bushy blonde said brightly as she introduced herself to Alex's new girl. "And this is Lorna, my main squeeze!" She then draped her arm around Lorna's waist.

"Hi," Wren whispered back looking between Nicky and Lorna.

An awkward silence then fell over the group for a moment. Alex had never before wished for the floor to open up and swallow her. The tension between Wren and Piper was just too much to bear. She tried to catch the blonde's eye, but she was avoiding her gaze. She was still fussing over Issy as she help the little girl take off her wings before putting on the jacket.

"Well, this is cozy!" smirked Nicky as she looked around at everyone with amusement.

xxx

"So where did Alex meet her?" asked Piper casually as the front door closed behind them and they proceed to go trick-or- treating. Issy was a few feet away from the trio.

"Litchfield," stated Nicky towards the blonde, who was watching as her daughter went up to the house next to Nicky's. There were already a few other neighbour kids there.

"What do you mean, Litchfield?" asked Piper in confusion. She still wasn't looking at Nicky. Her attention was on her daughter as she proceed down the stairs of the house and followed the same group of kids to the next house.

"That was her prison girlfriend. She ran into Wren about two weeks ago at the grocery store," explained Nicky as she took Lorna's hand. The trio was walking slowly down the street, following Issy.

Piper was silent for a moment as Issy came running towards them. Her pail was already full.

"Mommy," cried out Issy towards Piper, "Look at all the candy I got!"

Piper smiled down into the pail, "Wow! that's a lot of candy!" She then proceed to empty the pail into the pillow case she had brought along for this reason. She knew that the pail would fill up quickly.

Issy bounced from foot to foot as she waited for Piper to give her back the pail.

"Be careful," whispered Piper to her daughter as she kissed her head and sent her on her way to the houses on the other side of the street.

Piper waited again until her daughter was out of ear shot before addressing what Nicky had said. "Well, if she makes her happy...I'm not going to stop it. Me and Alex are just friends."

Both Nicky and Lorna couldn't help but snort with laughter at this.

"Like hell you guys are just friends!" cried Nicky, calling Piper out on her bullshit. Alex and Piper were never friends. She knew that Wren was going to be an issue for the blonde. She was never good with sharing. Especially, when it came to a Ms. Alex Vause.

She knew that Piper was jealous and that it would come out soon enough. And Nicky was planning on having front row seats for when it did.

Piper just rolled her eyes at Nicky at this before looking back onto her daughter. "It doesn't bother me," she murmured despite the green snake she could feel stirring in the pit of her stomach.

* * *

><p>Thanks for reading and please review!<p>

Julie


	14. Chapter 13

Do not own Orange Is the New Black or any of the characters.

So someone asked what happened to Joanna. Well, here is your answer. :)

Thanks so much for the support guys and your kind words. The feedback always helps write these chapters. Again big shout out to fig-aruna for all the help! :)

Enjoy!

* * *

><p><span><strong>Rainstorms<strong>

**_Chapter 13_**

_Not Jealous_

_November 2021_

"I can't believe she has a fucking girlfriend," Piper complained. Piper had come to visit Polly who had just had her third boy, Eli.

Polly, who was in the middle of warming up a bottle for the newborn, looked over her shoulder at Piper and frowned slightly. "Wait, Supercunt has a girlfriend?"

"Yes! It's her prison girlfriend or something. Her name is Wren, and she's a fucking bitch!" Piper ranted. It had been three days since Halloween, and Piper still couldn't wrap her head around it.

"I can't believe this!"

"I KNOW! Neither can I!"

"No, I mean I can't believe you!" laughed Polly as she turned to look at Piper.

"Me?"

"Yeah, you! You're fucking jealous," Polly stated. She knew Piper better than she knew herself sometimes. The blonde was definitely jealous that Alex had a new plaything, and it wasn't her.

"I am not jealous!" Piper protested. Yes, she was shocked, but not jealous. She had no right to be jealous.

"Then why are you so upset about this?" asked Polly with a slight smirk on her face. "You are fucking jealous, Pipes. Just admit it!"

Piper just huffed and glared at Polly who lifted the sleeping infant from the bassinette and took the seat across from her at the table.

Polly just smirked as she reached for the bottle and began to feed her son.

Piper fumed but remained silent. She wasn't jealous. She just didn't like Wren. That was it. After Halloween, Piper had met Wren again at Nicky and Lorna's house. She had been dropping Issy off for a play date there when Wren had showed up at the same time to meet Alex. Like the first time, it hadn't been very pleasant. Piper had been polite to her, but Wren just gave her the cold shoulder.

"I am not jealous," she stated again as she rested her chin in her hand and looked over at Polly. "I just hate when people are rude and judgemental before they even know me. I was more than nice to her, and she practically spit in my face."

Polly just shook her head at her friend. "Well, did you ever think that maybe she is just staking her territory with Alex? You guys do have a fucking long history together."

Piper frowned at this. Maybe Wren was just being a bitch because she was intimidated by her and Alex's history? But at the same time, there wasn't anything to worry about. Alex didn't want to be with her. They were just fucking friends. She didn't know what to make of all this. She was still very confused on where Alex and her even stood. In a way she felt like it was Litchfield all over again. Before all the other shit had happened. When she was trying to figure out how to get on Alex's good side.

Piper sighed as she watched Polly continue to feed Eli.

"If Alex came to you, would you go out with her?" asked Polly after a few moments had passed.

"Excuse me?" asked Piper as she lifted her head and stared wide-eyed at Polly.

"If Alex came to you and confessed her undying love and shit to you. Would you go out with her?" asked Polly as she placed the now empty bottle onto the table and lifted the infant up against her shoulder and began to burp him.

Piper frowned at this. Her heart was screaming yes. Of course she would go out with Alex if she confessed her love to her. But she couldn't admit that. She might be her best friend, but she didn't want Polly to be right.

Polly just smirked at Piper as if reading her thoughts. Piper was an idiot when it came to Alex. She knew that the blonde would go back to Alex in a flash if given the chance. And she sensed that it would only be a matter of time before that happened too.

xxx

"What are you so fucking happy about?" Alex asked Nicky as she came into the kitchen and saw Nicky and Lorna doing a happy dance.

"My Mom's coming home!" stated Nicky as she wrapped her arms around Lorna and looked over at Alex with a wide smile on her face.

"Your mom? I thought she lived in Boston now?" Alex asked in confusion as she made her way over to the fridge and got her self a can of Coke. After the Issy's birth, Nicky had reconnected with her mother. The two of them still didn't have the best relationship, but it was better than anyone they had had before. They talked at least once a month and made an effort to see each other on holidays.

"No, not my fucking mother!" Nicky replied. "My Mommy!"

Alex just cocked an eyebrow at this. She was still fucking confused.

"RED!" cried out Nicky. "RED IS FUCKING COMING HOME!"

"Red!?" asked Alex in obvious disbelief.

"Yes, Vause! RED! She's getting out!" Nicky cried out excitedly. There were tears of joy in her eyes. She had been waiting for this day for so long. She couldn't believe it was finally happening.

Alex's face broke out into a smile as everything began sinking in. "Oh my god," she murmured as she placed the can onto the counter and enclosed the space between her and Nicky.

All three women then hugged in celebration of this news. Red was getting out of Litchfield, like they all had.

"When?" asked Alex after a moment later as she pulled away from the group hug.

"She wasn't sure of the exact day, but sometime before the new year. I'm fucking hoping that she'll be out before Christmas though," Nicky stated quietly as she looked up at Alex. She fucking hoped that Red would be out for the holidays. She had something big planned this year, and she wanted Red to be there. The Russian woman was a mother to her. She deeply wanted her to be there. She had been waiting for Red to get out before celebrating her new life.

And now she could finally do so.

Nicky grinned deeply as she met Lorna's eye and winked. They were both thinking the same thing. They had talked about marriage over the years but had never gone through with it. Nicky didn't feel like it would be right without Red being there, which Lorna had understood. So they had decided to wait until Red got out, even if it took years. And now Red was finally getting released from Litchfield. She was getting off on good behaviour.

* * *

><p><em>May 2020<em>

"So...am I ever going to get to meet her?" asked Joanna.

Piper looked up from the newspaper she was reading and over towards her girlfriend of just fifteen months. They were at Piper's apartment.

"Meet who?" asked the blonde, not understanding.

Joanna just stared at Piper in disbelief for a moment before replying, "Your daughter!"

Piper had yet to introduce Issy to Joanna. It wasn't that Piper never had plans on doing so. She just wasn't ready to merge her two worlds together. "Jo," sighed Piper as she closed the newspaper and locked eyes with the other woman. "We've talked about this. It's not the right time."

"It's never the fucking right time!" cried Joanna in frustration. "I understood your need to do so when we first started dating. That was fine. But fuck, it's been a year! Over a year!"

"Well..." Piper couldn't really answer. She understood that Joanna was upset by this and why. She was always bringing up Issy and asking when she could meet her. Piper always made sure that Issy was with Larry for the night when she brought Joanna back to the apartment with her.

"No, Piper!" cried out Joanna, cutting her off. "There is no 'well' or 'maybe one day.' I want to meet her or else."

"Or else what?" asked Piper in confusion.

"Or else we are through. I want to be in a fucking relationship with you. I love you! And want to be a part of your life!"

"Jo..." Piper began as she reached across the table for Joanna's hand. "We are in a relationship. You are a part of my life."

"No, I'm fucking not!" cried Joanna as she snatched her hand away from Piper's and stood up. "If we were in a real relationship, you would have introduced me to your daughter by now! I'm clearly not important enough for you to do that."

Piper didn't know how to respond to this. A part of her knew that Joanna was right. If she really cared about her like she said she did, she would have introduced her to the most important thing in it, Issy. But Issy was her daughter. And she got to decided who met her and when.

A deafening silence fell over the two women as they stared at each other.

"You're right," admitted Piper, sadly. "I'm not ready to be in a proper relationship with you." This was the truth. Piper was scared to fully - mind, body and soul - be with Joanna. She was scared to allow her fully into her life and see her at her worse and best. "I'm sorry, Jo."

Piper had thought she was ready to love again, but she wasn't. Not in the way she wanted to be. She wanted to feel that rush again like she had with Alex when they had first met. That sudden attraction at first sight that was rare. That most people didn't believe in until it happened to them. Piper had been lucky enough to have had it twice. First with Alex, and then with Larry. She guessed she was being selfish in wanting it a third time, but that's what she wanted.

Piper didn't want to settle.

She wanted adventures like she had when she was 22.

* * *

><p><em>November 2021<em>

"Hi, Mommy!" Issy greeted Piper who had just arrived to pick her up from school.

"Hi, baby!" Piper greeted back with a smile. "Did you have a good day?" she asked as she took her daughter's hand and began to walk down the hallway with her.

"I did!" Issy replied with a bright smile on her face. Issy loved school.

"What did you learn?" asked Piper as she pushed open the door and lead Issy out of the building and into the yard. There was a cold chill in the air. Winter was definitely approaching.

"I learned all about Thanksgiving and the Indians and the Pilgrims," Issy responded as she began to skip alongside her mother.

Piper frowned at this. She didn't know whether or not to explain the real truth about Thanksgiving to Issy. She always wanted to be honest with her daughter, but she also wanted her to be a kid. She figured that Issy was too young to learn about what really happened on the first Thanksgiving. "Did you? What else did you learn?" she asked.

"I learned how to spell elephant. E-L-E-P-H-A-N-T!"

"Wow!" exclaimed Piper with a wide-eyed smile.

Issy then proceed to tell Piper about how a boy in her class named Eric threw up after eating a whole bottle of white glue.

Piper grinned as she listened to Issy go on. She loved picking up Issy from school and hearing about her day. It was one of the few things she looked forward to. Her daughter was her whole life. She knew that some might think it was sad that she didn't have a husband or a special someone in her life, but she didn't care. Issy was all she needed. Relationships were messy, but with Issy, it was easy.

She saw so much of herself in Issy that it scared her sometimes. Issy was so full of life and energy. Like Piper, the little girl had big dreams. She loved to learn and loved adventures.

Piper had once craved to see the world and hated to be in one place too long, but she had also wanted to settle down. With Issy, she got the best of both worlds. Each day was a different adventure with the four-year-old. She got to relive the world through the eyes of her daughter, which was the best adventure Piper could ask for.

* * *

><p>I know it was short and there wasn't a lot of Vauseman, but this is just a stepping stone for what is to happen in the next few chapters!<p>

Thanks again for reading and please review!

Julie


	15. Chapter 14

Do not own Orange Is the New Black or any of the characters.

So this chapter has been sitting on my computer forever, it was written before half the other ones were. It's a really long one but I think you guys will enjoy it.

Enjoy!

* * *

><p><span><strong>Rainstorms<strong>

_**Chapter 14**_

_Thanksgiving_

_November 2021_

"You're coming right?" Nicky asked Piper over the phone.

"I don't know...it might be pushing it. I'm supposed to be going to my parents' place in Connecticut for brunch, so I don't know if I'll be able to make it in time... Plus, Larry has her the next day. It might be better if we just skip it this year.." Piper explained as she cradled the phone between her ear and shoulder while packing Issy's lunch for the next day.

"Come on, Chapman. You can't skip out on me now!" Nicky exclaimed. "You're the reason why we started doing this in the first place. You're like one of the fucking founding fathers!"

Thanksgiving had always been Piper's favourite holiday. After she had gotten out from Litchfield and reconnected with Nicky, the two of them had made it their thing to celebrate the holiday together, and as the years had gone on, it had become bigger and bigger.

Piper couldn't help but laugh at this analogy of herself. "That's sweet. But I just think it will be too hard this year."

"Is this about Vause?" asked Nicky after a moment had passed. "Because, you know, I can tell her not to bring Wren."

"You would do that?" asked Piper in surprise.

"Well, I kinda already told her it would be fine if she brought Wren. But I can make her un-invite her," Nicky explained slowly on the other line.

"No, don't fucking do that," answered Piper with a sigh.

"So?"

"Fine, fine. I'll come. But if that bitch says or does something, I'm fucking out of there!" Piper replied, and she meant it. She had been avoiding going over to Nicky's over the last two weeks or so. She just didn't feel comfortable there with knowing that Alex had a girlfriend.

"Totally understandable!" agreed Nicky, "But I'm going to make Issy stay. I miss that kid."

"I know. She misses you guys too. I'm sorry about that. It's just..."

"Hey, you don't have to explain it to me, Chapman, I get it."

xxx

"Are you sure it's okay if Wren comes tonight?" Alex asked Nicky for the tenth time.

She knew Nicky had already said it would be okay, but she still didn't feel convinced. Alex knew that this was kinda Piper's and Nicky's thing, and she was just being invited to it. But Wren had nowhere to go and had asked Alex if she could come along when she had mentioned it.

"Yes, it's fine," Nicky answered with a smirk to Alex. The two women were in the kitchen, preparing the Thanksgiving feast. Nicky had gone all out this year with getting a twenty-pound turkey. "The more the merrier right!?" The much shorter woman then knocked hips against Alex.

"Sure," replied Alex as she adjusted her glasses on her nose.

"We can all exchange tales of Litchfield," Nicky continued. "I bet you and Wren have some good ones..."

Alex just rolled her eyes practically hearing the smirk in Nicky's voice. Yeah, she could tell the tale on how she and Wren almost got caught doing it in the fucking chapel. That wouldn't be awkward at all, the brunette thought sourly as she began to peel a potato.

xxx

"Come on in," Lorna greeted Piper and Issy as she held open the front door for them.

"Thanks, Lorna," whispered Piper in greeting to the shorter woman before taking a step inside, following Issy.

"Hi, Auntie Lorna!" cried Issy to her Godmother. She smiled warmly up at her.

"Hi, Issy!" squeaked Lorna back with a smile. "How was Thanksgiving at yours Nana's?"

"It was okay," Issy responded while Piper began to unzip the coat that the kid was wearing and helped her out of it. "Veronica and Vera let me play Barbies with them. Baby Lance got chocolate all over Nana's white walls in the hallway, and Uncle Danny is going to have another baby!"

Lorna just nodded her head listening to Issy's excited voice as she glanced over at Piper and met her eye. The two women smiled at each other. Lorna never got tired of hearing about the craziness that was Piper's family.

"Oh, wow! You're going to be a cousin again!"

Issy just shrugged her shoulders at this. She didn't really care about another kid coming into the family. "It's just a cousin," she murmured towards Lorna before turning her attention onto her mother, who was hanging up Issy's coat in the hall closet.

"Mommy," called the four-year-old.

"Yes, Honey," Piper answered as she turned to look at her daughter as she proceeded to shed her own wool jacket and hung it up in the closet beside Issy's.

"I _need_ to go potty!"

Piper glanced over at Lorna at this before looking down at the daughter who had begun to do some sort of dance. The blonde knew this look all too well.

"Ok. Ok." she responded as she suddenly picked up the little girl and headed towards the bathroom upstairs.

Lorna couldn't help but chuckle as she watched Piper race up the stairs with Issy in her arms. There was a half-bath on the main level of the house, but Issy could only use the one on the second floor for some reason.

Piper didn't think twice as she reached for the bathroom door and opened it. No one was ever up here. But this time she was wrong. The bathroom was definitely in use.

Piper just stood frozen to the spot, still holding her daughter as she took in the sight of the two women kissing before her. Alex and Wren hadn't noticed her yet as they continued to kiss. The blonde was in shock at what she was seeing. Never before had she seen Alex kiss another woman, and it made her blood boil slightly as Wren traveled her hands down Alex's arms.

This went on for a moment longer before Issy let out a frantic whimper, "_Mommyyyy_! I need to _goo_!"

"What the fuck?"

"Oh. My. God!"

Wren and Alex immediately pulled away from each other and stared at Piper and Issy. The blonde was just as shocked and shifted her gaze between the two women in front of her. She opened her mouth to say something, but words seemed to have failed her. She was both embarrassed for interrupting the couple and angry. Who the fuck made-out in their friend's bathroom? Especially when they were over the age of 19? Her blue eyes continued to pierce into the couple, who were clearly as embarrassed and uncomfortable about the situation as Piper was.

Everyone seemed to forget about the little girl who needed to use the bathroom, badly.

"MOMMY!" cried out Issy, trying to get her mother's attention.

Piper tore her eyes away from Alex and Wren and looked down at her daughter as she felt a warm wetness growing at her side.

"Shit!" she swore at this.

"I went," whispered Issy as she looked up with Piper with tears in her eyes.

"It's okay, " whispered Piper as she kissed the side of Issy's cheek before putting her down.

The blonde then addressed the couple, "Are you done?" Her voice was calm and cool towards them. She didn't want to make a scene, but at the same time, she felt like it. If the couple hadn't been making out in there, she would have gotten Issy to the bathroom quickly enough. Instead of standing here with urine on her dress.

Alex, who knew that look of Piper's all too well, quickly grabbed Wren by the wrist and pulled her out of the bathroom. Not another word was spoken as Alex and Wren quickly exited the bathroom and proceeded down the stairs.

Piper didn't give them a second glance as she lead Issy into the bathroom and closed the door behind her.

xxx

"I'm sorry about this," whispered Piper as Nicky handed her a pair of sweat pants and a t-shirt to wear.

"It's okay, Chapman," Nicky replied back with a smile. "Are you sure you don't want to borrow something from Alex to wear? These might be a little short on you..."

"No! Hell no!" whispered Piper harshly towards the shorter woman. "These are fine, really." There was no way she was going to borrow Alex's clothes and wear them for the rest of the night while Wren was here. She only really needed something to wear for an hour or so while her dress got washed.

Nicky just smirked at Piper. "Suit, yourself."

Piper's blue eyes pierced into Nicky's brown ones. They were in the master bedroom. After Issy's accident, Piper had gotten Issy out of her soiled white tights and dress and into a clean pair of clothes that Nicky had at the house for situations like this. Issy was downstairs, helping Lorna in the kitchen.

"What?" asked Nicky as she continued to gawk at Piper. "Are you serious, Chapman? I have seen you naked before. I saw you fucking give birth to your daughter, and you're embarrassed about me seeing you change?"

Piper continued to look at Nicky before rolling her eyes. "Fine," she sighed as she placed the clothes onto the bed and reached for the zipper on the side of the fitted navy blue dress she was wearing. She pretended that Nicky wasn't there as she slipped the dress off and proceeded to change into the pair of sweat pants and white shirt she had been given. Nicky was right, the pants were too short. They stopped about an inch above her ankle, but she didn't care.

Nicky just smirked at Piper as she handed over her dress to be washed along with Issy's clothes. "Looking sexy, Urkel!"

"Fuck you," replied Piper once again, rolling her eyes at Nicky.

xxx

"Mommy, I want juice," demanded Issy as Piper came into the living room.

Piper's blue eyes scanned around the living room before looking down at her daughter. Everyone was in the room, except for Nicky. Alex and Wren were sitting together on the large couch, while Lorna sat opposite in the matching loveseat. Piper hated how uncomfortable she felt at the moment. She could feel Alex's eyes on her, but she chose to ignore them as she touched her daughter's head.

"Okay," Piper whispered in response, suddenly overcome with exhaustion. She had been up since six that morning running around before taking a two-hour train ride to Connecticut. She usually looked forward to Thanksgiving after the celebration with her family's, but to be honest, she just wanted to go home and sleep. She knew she needed to stick it out for a bit longer though. She wouldn't let Wren have the satisfaction of thinking that she couldn't handle her and Alex being together.

"Mommmyyyy!" Issy whined again as she looked up at Piper. The four-year-old wasn't usually this fussy, but Piper could tell that her daughter was tired too. It had been a long day for both of them.

"Okay. Okay," Piper said as she closed her eyes briefly and let out a slight sigh. She then ran a hand through her hair before turning to head towards the kitchen.

"Here, let me," spoke Lorna as she stood up from her seat and touched Piper's wrist, drawing the blonde's attention towards her. "You sit. Pour yourself a glass of wine." She smiled and gestured to the bottle of wine and the empty glasses on the coffee table.

Piper smiled at Lorna in thanks. A glass of wine did sound good at the moment, she thought as she took the seat where Lorna had just been sitting.

"Come on, Issy-Wissy!" Lorna said as she took the little girl's hand, "Let's get you some juice!"

Alex stood up too. Both Piper and Wren looked up at her in surprise. "I'm going to get another beer..." she whispered, gesturing to the empty glass in her hand. "Does anyone want anything?" she asked awkwardly as an afterthought.

Piper locked eyes with Alex briefly but then vigorously shook her head in reply.

Alex allowed her eyes to linger on Piper for a second before looking over at Wren, who just smiled up at her. "I'm okay, baby." She reached out and touched Alex's hand before glancing over at Piper, who was trying not to look at them.

Alex didn't say anything as she looked from Wren to Piper and back before leaving the room. She hoped that everything would be okay if she left the two women alone for a moment. An uneasy feeling came over her however. She knew how both women could be. They were like tigers snarling in a locked cage when angry. She knew she would have to be quick or World War Three would break out.

"I know what you are doing," stated Wren in a low whisper once she knew that Alex was out of earshot.

"Excuse me?" asked Piper in confusion.

"I know what you are doing," Wren repeated. "Don't act all innocent. I know what you are fucking doing with that child of yours."

Piper's eyes fused together as thoughts began to form in her head. "Is this about me walking in on you and Alex kissing? I'm sorry, but my daughter had to use the bathroom!" Piper responded, trying to piece what Wren was getting at. "I didn't know you two were fucking up there!"

Wren just rolled her eyes at Piper at this. An evil smirk of sorts was playing out on her face. Her eyes were ice-cold towards Piper. She meant business. "Like fuck you did! Just admit it. You're using that brat of a kid of yours to get to Alex."

Piper stared at this Wren woman in disbelief as she was in the middle of pouring herself a glass of wine. She couldn't believe what she had just heard come out of this skank's mouth.

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me. Your kid is a brat!" Wren said nastily as she leaned forward from her spot on the couch. "She's spoiled like her mother! And you think you can just use her to dig your little yuppie claws into Alex again...I don't think so blon_die_! Alex is my woman!"

Piper just gawked at this fake bitch seated in front of her. Her body was vibrating with rage. How dare she insult her daughter in front of her! This girl had some nerve! "First off, fuck you! You fucking don't know anything about me! And second, do not insult my kid! You cunt!" Piper was surprised at how relatively calm her voice was at the moment as she continued to glare at Wren. She wanted to wring in this bitch's neck, suddenly.

Wren didn't seem to be threatened by Piper and merely laughed at Piper's insult like it was the funniest thing she'd ever heard. "I know plenty about you, blondie. Alex told me all about your past. How you fucking left her when her mom died and then fucking cheated on her while she was stuck in Litchfield! Don't give me any of this '_you don't understand_ _me' _shit! Because trust me, honey, I know!" Wren then flashed her pearly white teeth at Piper before casually taking sip of her wine.

"And if you ask me, you deserved it."

Piper cocked an eyebrow at this. She had lost her. "Deserved what?" she asked in utter confusion.

"What that fucking fatso did to you...what was his name? Healy!"

Piper was on her feet at this. She was literally shaking with rage as she glared down at this Wren person. She didn't know who this bitch thought she was, that she could just come in and judge her about shit she knew fucking nothing about. "Fuck you!" screamed Piper in utter anger. She hadn't felt like this in years. Such anger for a person. The last time had been Pennsatucky, and she had beaten her face in. At the moment, that didn't sound like such a bad idea for this Wren person.

Wren once again laughed before rising to her feet. She still had the wine glass in her hand as she locked eyes on Piper. "That's all you got... a fuck you? What happened to that Wild Chapman that everyone talked about at Litchfield? I guess it was all just fucking talk...wasn't it? You're just a WASP. A plain, boring WASP!"

Piper didn't say anything at this. She had nothing to say. If this girl wanted her to hit her, she wasn't going to do it. This wasn't Litchfield where you had to have a showdown to prove something. They were standing in the middle of Nicky and Lorna's living room. She wasn't going to start some sort of cat fight.

However, Wren kept on egging her on. Her voice was irritatingly low so that only Piper could hear her. "You think you're some sort of princess, don't you? That you're some sort of special just because you got raped and are a single mom. You think that Alex will feel sorry for you and take you back. But she's mine, Chapman! So you keep the fuck away... you and that kid of yours. You stay the fuck away. Because Alex doesn't need you. She has a real woman now. Not some two-timing cocksucker like yourself!"

The two women sized each other up at this. Piper's gaze was ice-cold as she looked on at Wren. Their faces were just inches apart, and she could smell the alcohol on Wren's breath as she continued to breathe heavily down her neck. Piper's hands were clenched tightly at her sides, only barely resisting the urge to punch this girl in the face. Everyone was in the kitchen and would be returning any minute. It was Thanksgiving, and she wasn't going to ruin it.

"Look, you can fucking have her," whispered Piper in a firm voice. "I don't want her."

Wren once again threw her head back and laughed at this. She looked back at Piper with a gleam in her eyes. "Like hell you do. Why else do you always come over here, complaining how that ex-husband of yours is fucking working and you need someone to watch that kid of yours? Do you do nothing yourself? Just admit it, you are using that kid to get to Alex. How pathetic is that? Using the bastard kid whose conception lost you Alex to win her fucking back! Just admit it. Everyone can see through your little act, Chapman!"

Piper couldn't believe this was happening. She hadn't even known Wren for that long. This was like only her third or fourth time meeting Alex's girlfriend. Both other times had just been a brief Hi.

"You fucking don't even know me. I'm not trying to steal Alex from you. I have my own life..." Piper whispered fiercely before turning to walk away. She didn't need this, she thought. She was just going to get Issy and politely excuse herself. She was clearly not welcomed here. She couldn't get very far though as Wren reached out and grasped her by the wrist.

"What the fuck do you want?" Piper asked as she turned around suddenly to face the woman again. "You said what you wanted to say. Do you really think I'm going to fight you or something?"

Wren just sniggered at this.

She was definitely plastered, Piper noted. What did Alex see in her? She couldn't help but wonder as she looked at her. Yes, she was hot and had that tall model thing going for her, but, really, what did Alex see in her? And she just wasn't thinking this because she was jealous. She just didn't see it, period.

"No, I don't want you to fight me. I just want you to admit it..."

"Admit what?" cried out Piper as she wrenched her arm away from Wren.

"Admit that you still love Alex," stated Wren in a serious voice. Her hazel eyes blazed into Piper's. "That you fucking want her."

Piper just shook her head in disbelief at this. Was this girl fucking bipolar or something? One minute she is telling Piper to stay away and the next she wants her to tell her that she loves Alex?

"I'm not stupid, Chapman. I can see the way you look at her when she walks into a room. You're practically undressing her with your fucking Bambi eyes. Now, Alex is way too nice to say anything about it, but I sure am not. You _fucking_ need to back the fuck off! Alex doesn't love you! She. Loves. _Me_!"

Piper stared at Wren, completely flabbergasted. Her heart was pounding against her chest as she continued to study the other woman in shocked disbelief.

"You know the reason she only got back together with you at Litchfield was because she felt sorry for you. You were a pathetic mess, and she felt sorry for you. You didn't have anyone to love you. But you see, she didn't realize until after you cheated on her and she met me that she never truly loved you. She was only going through the motions of it."

Piper found herself sucking her teeth at this. This girl had hit a nerve within her. Her blue eyes blurred with tears, but she didn't let them fall. She was wrong, she thought. Alex hadn't just been going through the motions with her. They had been in love. That was the one thing that had kept her going at Litchfield after the incident with Healy. Alex.

A blur of them making love on the stage of the chapel suddenly filled Piper's mind.

_Alex looked up briefly at Piper, making sure she was okay before she once again began to kiss her way down the flatness of Piper's stomach. Her lips moved down the curve of her ribcage and down to her belly button. She swirled the tip of her tongue inside it before making her way down to the two silver marks just above her hip bone. _

_It was here Taylor had stabbed her with the screwdriver. _

_Alex spent sometime here. _

_She continued to press her lips against the scars, like a mother kisses the pain of a boo-boo away. It was the first time she was seeing the scars. She had once known every scar and mark on Piper's body. _

_But she was now a new country to explore to Alex. _

_Her fingers once again brushed against Piper's pussy, teasing her again before traveling down the side of her inner thigh. The pads of her fingers lovingly touching the ridges of cuts that marked her leg. They were all closed and healing now, but it still didn't make it easy for Alex to see. She hated that they were there. But they were part of Piper now, and she couldn't change that. _

_Silent tears fell from Piper's eyes and rolled down her cheeks as Alex continued to touch her body. She had never felt so overwhelmed by someone's love then she was at this moment with Alex. _

_Alex was showing her that she was loved. _

_"You okay?" whispered Alex in a tender voice as she looked up and peered at Piper. She knew this was hard on Piper, and she didn't want to go any further if Piper wasn't ready. _

_Piper lifted her head up at this and nodded. Despite her tears, she was happy. She smiled warmly at Alex in return. _

_"Yes," she whispered in a low voice. _

_She was really okay._

"FUCK YOU!" screamed Piper loudly as she came back to reality.

She didn't care who heard her now as she glared at Wren.

"FUCK YOU!"

How dare this woman who had known Alex - for what - ten minutes make her think that what she and Alex had wasn't real. It had been fucking real. Alex did love her, or had loved her. It had _not_ been some figment of her imagination.

"What in God's name is going on in here?" asked Nicky as she appeared in the room and looked between Piper and Wren, who were still breathing down each other's necks. The tension in the room was thick and obvious.

Both women turned and glanced over at Nicky, who was waiting for an explanation.

Neither women said anything as they stepped away coldly from each other. Wren flipped her long honey-brown hair in Piper's face before taking her seat on the couch again. Nicky's eyes trailed over her before looking at Piper, who was shaking.

Piper just shook her head, telling Nicky to drop it as she tried to compose herself. She breathed heavily out through her nose as she rubbed the back of her neck. She just needed some time to calm down. She was still pissed as hell.

"Hey, Lorna wants to know where you put the pepper?..." Alex's voice trailed off slightly as she looked away from Nicky and further into the room. She cocked an eyebrow as she felt the tension between her ex-girlfriend and her current girlfriend. Her green eyes glanced between Wren and Piper, looking for an answer. This wasn't fucking good, she thought. There was usually some sort of tension between the two women, but this was something else all together.

Neither woman said a word. Wren just shrugged her shoulders while Piper avoided Alex's eyes all together.

Something had gone down between them. She just wasn't sure what.

"What the hell happened?" asked Alex as she addressed Wren. When she had left the room to help Lorna in the kitchen, everything had been fine or so she had thought. Issy had been talking up a storm like she usually did. Wren was drinking her wine and being civil with Piper. She knew that Wren didn't like Piper, but Alex had told her that she had nothing to worry about.

She was with her.

Wren just shrugged her shoulders again before smiling a little too sweetly for Alex's liking. "Nothing!" she answered breezily.

Alex just nodded her head as she looked away from Wren and over to Piper for confirmation at this.

Piper's face was blank and distant as she finally locked eyes with her. Her blue eyes were cold towards Alex.

They held each other gaze for a second longer before Piper excused herself out of the room.

xxx

Piper chewed on her thumbnail as she sat in the chair, barely listening to the conversation around her. She was impatiently shaking her leg, and her body was still pulsing with rage over what Wren had said to her. She didn't dare to look in the bitch's direction as she sat with Alex on the couch. She wanted to go home, she thought to herself.

She hated how uncomfortable she felt at the moment. She had always looked forward to going over to Nicky's after having a Thanksgiving lunch at her parent's house. Thanksgiving at Nicky's was always fun, but this year, it was proving to be anything but. She let out a sigh before burying her face into her hands. She knew that Issy wouldn't be too happy about leaving, but she couldn't take the dirty looks that Wren kept on throwing in her direction. This was fucking stupid, thought Piper bitterly to herself. She felt like she was in fucking high school again or something.

The conversation came to a halt in the room as everybody watched as Piper stood up suddenly.

"I sorry to do this, but I think me and Issy are going to head out," spoke Piper as she addressed Nicky and Lorna.

"What? Why?" asked Nicky in confusion as she removed her arm from Lorna's shoulder and stood up. "We haven't even fucking eaten yet."

Piper just glared at Nicky before replying, "I know, but Larry is picking up Issy early tomorrow...and..." Her voice trailed off as she tried to silently get her message across to Nicky. "I just need to leave..." she whispered so only that Nicky could hear her.

Nicky just raised her eyebrows at this. Clearly Wren was making the blonde feel uncomfortable. She didn't blame her. It was a fucking uncomfortable situation for all of them.

"Okay," she relented with a shrug of her shoulders.

"Issy, say your goodbyes," spoke Piper as she addressed her daughter. "We have to go."

Issy looked up from where she was colouring on the floor, and her brown eyes were filled with puzzlement. "Why?" she asked. "I don't want to go."

"Baby, come on. Say goodbye," stated Piper as she lifted her daughter off of the floor and closed the colouring book. She didn't normally move this quickly with Issy, but she was in no mood to argue with the four-year-old. She just wanted to get home.

"NO!" screamed Issy as she tried to fight off Piper's hold on her. "I DON'T WANT TO GO!" Tears filled her eyes as she stomped her feet in protest.

"Baby, please," begged Piper to her daughter. She closed her eyes for a second, trying to blink the hot tears away. She couldn't lose it now, she thought. Not in front of Wren and Alex.

"NO!" screamed Issy again as she pulled away from Piper. She didn't want to leave. Her brown eyes were filled with determination.

Nicky took a step towards Piper and opened her mouth to try and help, but Piper stopped her. "Don't," she warned as she locked eyes briefly with Nicky. She didn't need her help.

"Issy, come on," hissed Piper as she turned once again to her daughter. The four-year-old once again cried out as she tried to fight Piper off. She wasn't leaving without a fight.

"Here, let me help," spoke Wren suddenly as she stood up from her seat on the couch and began to make her way over to where Piper stood.

"Do not fucking touch my daughter!" cried out Piper as she suddenly turned to face Wren, her face filled with hatred towards the other woman. She didn't need this bitch's help. How dare she pretend to be all sweet and nice to her when she had already made her true feelings about her and her daughter perfectly clear.

Wren raised both of hands in caution towards Piper. She pretended to be shocked by Piper's statement. "Geesh, I was only trying to help," she stated as she looked at Piper before looking around the room. She was trying to make Piper look like the bad person here.

"Fuck you!" spat Piper at Wren. She didn't usually swear in front of Issy, but that was the least of her worries at the moment. She glared at Wren with hatred before once again turning to her daughter. Piper lifted the flailing child onto her hip in one fluid motion and stormed out of the house without another word.

The room was deadly silent as the front door slammed loudly behind Piper. No one dared to speak a word. They were all too shocked over the blonde's swift departure to say anything yet.

Nicky looked over at Alex, who cocked an eyebrow. She was just as surprised as she was. Alex then looked over at Wren, who had retaken her seat beside Alex on the couch. "What the fuck was that about?" she asked towards her.

"How am I supposed to know?" Wren asked, suddenly getting upset at Alex. "I just offered to help her out... She clearly doesn't have a handle on her kid!"

Nicky opened her mouth to say something at this but decided against it. Her brown eyes pierced with disgust towards Wren for a second. Chapman knew how to handle her kid, she thought. Piper didn't usually go all mother bear unless she had to. Wren had definitely said something to the blonde earlier to set her off.

No one said anything for a second.

Wren just shrugged her shoulders as she flipped her hair back and poured herself another glass of wine.

Alex adjusted her glasses on the bridge of her nose as she continued to look at her girlfriend. She wanted to believe her, she really did. But something in her stomach was telling her different. She had seen Piper flip out multiple times before. She knew that Piper only did so when she was pushed hard enough. She didn't know what Wren could say to Piper, but she had clearly done something to make Piper lose it.

"What did you say to her?" Alex asked her girlfriend, trying to keep the suspicion out of her voice.

"You heard what I said to her. I just offered to help... She's the one who flipped out. Don't fucking blame this on me!" snapped Wren towards Alex.

"I'm not fucking blaming anything on you," Alex snapped back. "I just asked you a question. What did you say to her? And not just now, but like earlier. You two clearly where fighting about something when I left the fucking room!"

Alex was trying really hard not to take sides. She just wanted to be told what the fuck was going on. Was that too much to ask? she thought bitterly to herself as she continued to glare at Wren, waiting for an answer.

Wren just rolled her eyes in response to Alex. "_Nothing_!"

Alex just glared at Wren. She didn't believe her.

"I'm serious. I didn't say fucking anything to blondie! She is the one who flipped out on me! It's not my fault she is super sensitive!" Wren hissed through her teeth to Alex.

It was Alex's turn to roll her eyes at this.

"Are you seriously going to believe your crazy ex-girlfriend over me! Your _girlfriend_!?"

Alex just shook her head before looking over in the direction of Nicky and Lorna. She smiled apologetically at them. "Let's not fight, okay," she whispered as she once again turned her attention onto her girlfriend. Her voice came out strained and thin. She didn't want to talk about this at the moment. At least not in front of her friends. It was still Thanksgiving.

Wren just huffed in reply at this. She was clearly not happy but didn't say another word about Piper.

xxx

Piper didn't allow herself to break down until she was safely back at her apartment.

Issy whined and whimpered slightly as Piper finally let her go. The child was exhausted and cranky. She still didn't understand why they had left Nicky's.

"I want to go back," whined Issy slightly as Piper began to undress her. Her brown eyes were filled with unshed tears as she continued to pout her lower lip at Piper.

Piper didn't say anything as she lay the dress that Issy had been just been wearing on the bed and reached for a clean pair of pajamas. They were Issy's favourite. They were the soft flannel ones with Hello Kitty on them.

"Mommy, I don't wanna go to bed," Issy said as she stood there allowing for Piper to dress her.

Again, Piper didn't say anything to her daughter as she smoothed out her hair and planted a kiss to her forehead. "Do you want ice cream for dinner?" Piper asked because _she_ wanted ice cream.

Issy's face broke out into a smile at this. "Yes!" she nodded her head vigorously in reply.

Piper smiled at this.

She once again planted a kiss onto Issy's forehead before standing up and taking the child's hand to lead her to the kitchen. Mother and daughter then shared a tub of mint chocolate chip ice cream together.

Their favourite.

xxx

It was only after Issy was fast asleep in her bed and Piper had poured herself a much needed glass of wine that the tears finally came.

Piper leaned back in the bathtub and cried.

She cried over every word that Wren had said. For bringing up the past like she had. Her whole body ached with pain. Old wounds had been reopened. Every since Issy had been born, she hadn't let herself think about those dark days at Litchfield. At her time in SHU. About Pennsatucky. About Healy. She hadn't gone there in a while.

But now she was here and she couldn't get away.

The pain was too much.

She breathed heavily as she drank steadily from the wine. She hated this. She fucking hated that she was back here again.

She tried not to look at the silver scars that lined her thighs. She barely looked at them nowadays. She hated that they were there. She hated how she had done that to her body.

She hadn't cut in almost five years now.

The last time she remembered doing so was after that night she had slept with Larry. It had been a moment of weakness. She had still been upset over seeing Healy and then with the added mess of Pete's accident.

She had fallen back on an old habit.

A habit she didn't dare to fall on to now. She had Issy to think about. She needed a mother.

So instead, Piper just cried and drank her wine and cried some more.

* * *

><p>More to come soon. Thanks for reading!<p>

Julie


	16. Chapter 15

Do not own Orange Is the New Black or any of the characters.

Wow, I have never had such a strong response I must say than I did on the last chapter with Wren.

I feel like we all need to take a deep calming breath and as Yoga Jones would say, put our soft faces on...

This chapter I hope will make you guys happier than the last chapter did.

Enjoy!

* * *

><p><span><strong>Rainstorms<strong>

_**Chapter 15**_

_Laying It All Out There_

_August 2020_

Darkness filled Alex's sight.

She couldn't see a damn thing as she felt Wren push her up against the wall and began to kiss the side of her neck. She could feel the other woman's hands roaming down her stomach and circling the waistband of her pants.

"Baby, _I'll_ miss you," whispered Wren into Alex's ear.

"Will you miss me?"

"Yes," murmured Alex as she felt Wren's hand slide down into the waistband of her pants and cup her sex. They were in the utility closet. It was Wren's last night in Litchfield. The couple had decided to leave on good terms and not on a sad one. They were having one last romp together.

"Say how much you'll miss me," whispered Wren, her breath hot against Alex's ear.

"_Mmmmmm_...so much," whimpered Alex as she closed her eyes and let out a shuddered breath as Wren's fingers began to rub against her moist cunt through the material of her white panties.

"... _soo_ fucking much!" moaned out Alex as she pressed her body up against the wall and felt the roughness of Wren's fingers as they pushed aside her panties and went to town.

Alex didn't know how much she would really miss Wren. She knew that she would miss _this_...the sex, though.

* * *

><p><em>November 2021<em>

"Look, this isn't working," spoke Alex as she looked over at Wren.

The two of them were outside on the front porch of the house. It was just after dinner now. After Piper had left, the tension between the women had been thick to say the least and had only gotten worse as dinner went on. Alex couldn't pretend any longer with Wren. She needed to end this now.

"What isn't working?" asked Wren stupidly. She was drunk. She had been drinking since she had arrived at dinner and kept on.

Alex knew the girl was drunk, but did she really need to draw it out for her. "This," she gestured to the space between her and Wren. "I can't fucking do this anymore."

Wren just glared at Alex for a second before smiling. "You're joking right!?"

Alex cocked an eyebrow at this. "Are you fucking kidding me? This isn't a joke. I can't do this anymore."

Being with Wren wasn't has fun as it had been at Litchfield. Yes, the sex was good. But Alex realized that Wren didn't have the best personality. A fact she must have blocked out at Litchfield. But out here, in the real world, she couldn't shy away from what was in front of her. Wren was drunk for most of the day and high all the rest of the times. Wren was two-faced. She would act sweet and nice around others, but her true colours would come out when they were gone.

Alex knew that Wren didn't like Piper. She had always had a hatred for her ex. Which was fine. That was understandable. But she knew that Wren had said something to Piper today, and that didn't sit well with Alex. Alex might've hated Piper at first, especially at Litchfield, but that hatred had thawed over time. She still couldn't trust her, but that didn't mean that she'd stopped caring for her. Her feelings for Piper would always run deep.

"This is about her, isn't it!?" stated Wren, the smile from her face gone and replaced with annoyance. "I can't believe this! I thought we were in love!"

Alex couldn't help but laugh slightly at this. "We were never in love!"

Wren looked at Alex like she had just slapped her. Her hazel eyes blazed into Alex's with confused hatred.

"I loved you! I still love you!" she cried out. There were unshed tears in her eyes as she continued to make her point to Alex.

"Well, I don't love you," stated Alex in a firm voice. "Look, it's been fun this past month or so. And maybe we were in love or whatnot at Litchfield. But out here it's different."

_I love someone else._

"So this is about that bitch!"

"Would you fucking stop talking about her? This isn't about Piper. I don't know the fuck you have against her just because we have a past together...but just fucking stop. This isn't high school!" Alex couldn't take anymore of Wren's badmouthing. When they had first started to see each other, she had confessed her anger towards Piper to Wren. But she had kept some things to herself. Wren had gotten some of her other information from others at Litchfield who had been there when things had gone down for the blonde.

"I can't believe you are fucking defending her! She cheated on you, Alex! I have never cheated on you!"

Alex couldn't help but roll her eyes at this. She had broken up with plenty of people in the past, but never had she had someone be so stubborn about the fact, that she was ending it. The women just glared at each other for a moment.

Alex crossed her arms over her chest and let out a sigh. She really just wanted this to be done with. "Look, Wren. it's over. Plain and simple. Do not fucking call me. Do not fucking visit me. It's over."

"You know you're fucking going to regret this," stated Wren in a matter-of-fact tone as she took a slight step towards Alex. "She's just going to do it again. She's going to trap you in and then stomp on your heart. And that kid of hers is just going to drive you up the wall. And then soon as you know it, you'll be tied down to her, being called Mommy by that brat. And, you'll miss this...me."

Alex uncrossed her arms and sized up Wren. They were about the same height. Alex was an inch or so taller. She pushed her glasses up on top of her head and just glared at Wren. Maybe she had a point. Maybe she would regret going back to Piper...if she did. But she wouldn't miss this, she thought. Wren was too childish for her. She was in her early thirties but still. She acted like she was twenty. She was also way insecure and clingy for Alex. Alex wasn't in love like Wren thought. They hadn't even gone out on a proper date. They just usually fucked.

"I won't fucking miss you..." she whispered as she narrowed her green eyes at Wren. She didn't know what the future held for her. But she knew whatever happened that she wouldn't miss this. She hadn't missed it very much after Wren had left Litchfield, and she was pretty sure she wouldn't miss it now.

Wren glared up at Alex with hatred in her eyes before raising her hand and slapping Alex across the face.

The sound of skin impacting skin rang out over the night air and faded into an eerie silence. Time seemed to stand still at that moment as Alex touched the side of her face and slowly looked on at Wren.

"Alex, I'm so sorry," murmured the other woman with tears in her eyes.

Alex just glared at Wren for a second debating if she should hit back or not. Rage bubbled within her body. If this had been any other situation, she would've kicked this bitch's ass in a second. She licked her lips slowly, tasting blood. Her lower lip was bleeding from where Wren's ring had come in contact with the skin.

"Get the fuck out of my sight!" swore Alex bitterly towards Wren. "Or else I'll kick your ass!" Her voice was like ice as her green eyes continued to pierce into Wren.

Wren just stared at Alex for a second before doing what she was told. Her honey-blonde hair swiped slightly against Alex's face, making her wince as she raced down the stairs and out of Alex's sight.

"Fuck," swore Alex as she pushed her glasses back onto her face and touched the tender skin. There would definitely be a mark in the morning.

xxx

Piper held her breath as she heard the soft thud of her daughter's feet approach the door and push it open.

"Mommy?" whispered the little girl as she entered the bedroom.

Piper continued to bite down on her lower lip and pretended to be asleep. She didn't want Issy to see her like this. She just wanted to be alone.

"Mommy?" whispered Issy in a small voice as she approached the bed.

"Issy, go back to bed," replied Piper as she looked over her shoulder and at her daughter in the darkened bedroom.

Issy ignored Piper as she climbed onto the bed and crawled over to her. "Mommy," whispered the little girl again. "What's wrong?"

Piper blinked away the tears in her eyes and just shook her head slightly. "Nothing, baby," she whispered. "Go back to bed."

Issy wasn't convinced by this. She had heard Piper crying from her bedroom. The four-year-old could sense that something was the matter. Her brown eyes studied Piper's face for a moment before moving closer to her on the bed. "You're crying," stated the little girl. "Do you have a boo-boo, Mommy?"

Piper's eyes stung with tears at this. She did have a boo-boo. A lot of old boo-boos, she thought. She nodded her head slightly in reply to her daughter.

"I kiss it better," whispered Issy.

Piper couldn't help but smile at this. Tears then began to flow down her cheeks that she didn't try to stop. It hurt too much to hold them in.

Issy didn't say another word as she snuggled up to Piper on the bed.

Piper rolled onto her back at this and held her daughter close. She cried slightly into her hair as she cradled her like a baby.

Issy allowed for Piper to hold her like this. Her cheek was pressed against Piper's chest. As if sensing that it was a broken heart her mother was suffering from, Issy pressed a kiss to the skin, just where Piper's heart could be felt beating.

This made Piper cry even harder.

xxx

"DADDY! DADDY!" cried Issy as she raced down the hallway from her room to the open front door where Larry stood.

It was the next morning.

Larry's face broke out into a smile as he looked down at his daughter. "Hey, Iss!" he greeted the four-year-old back warmly. He lifted her up and planted a kiss to her cheek. "You all set to go?" His brown eyes looked at her before drifting over to Piper who had just appeared.

Piper tucked her blonde hair behind her ears and smiled at her ex. She then handed Issy's overnight bag over to him. "She's all yours," she said in a tired voice.

Larry stared at Piper with concern. He could sense that something was the matter. "You okay?" he asked in a low voice.

After so many years, Larry still cared about Piper. She was the mother of his child. And even though it hadn't worked out between them, he would always care about her.

Piper just nodded her head and rubbed the side of her face. "I'm okay," she stated in a whisper. "Just tired." She knew she probably looked liked shit to Larry. She hadn't gotten much sleep last night.

Larry continued to look at her with concern for a moment longer before dropping the subject. "I'll drop her off on Sunday, around four?"

Piper nodded her head at this. That sounded good to her. It was currently Friday, and it was Larry's weekend with Issy.

"That's fine. I'll be here," she whispered. She had no other plans for the weekend except for staying in her apartment and maybe doing some work. But with the current state of her emotions, she didn't think that would be happening.

Larry nodded his head at this before looking over at Issy.

"Bye, Mommy," whispered the little girl to Piper.

Piper smiled back at her daughter. "Bye, baby!" She was usually sad to see her daughter leave, but she was kind of relieved at the moment that she would be gone for a few days. She didn't know if she could keep up this act much longer of pretending everything was okay.

xxx

Piper's feet pounded against the sidewalk as she ran. The air was cold and damp as she pushed it in and out of her lungs with each breath.

It was moments like these that she was thankful that she was free and able to run. Running always helped clear her mind. It was like Yoga Jones had always talked about. You had to channel your energy and anger in a physical way. And that was what she was trying to do now with going for a run.

She couldn't stand to be in her apartment alone. The silence had been killing her. Being left with only her thoughts to keep her company reminded her of being locked in the SHU. That old anxiety of being in that room was returning slowly, like feeling like she couldn't breathe.

She had been going stir-crazy.

Piper didn't know where she was running to, but she didn't care as her feet continued to pound on the sidewalk.

She just needed to keep on moving.

xxx

Piper stopped running and caught her breath for a second. As she did so, she noticed where she was. She was in Nicky's neighbourhood. She frowned at this. She hadn't thought she had gone that far.

As she continued to stand on the sidewalk catching her breath, she debated on whether to go to Nicky's house or not. She hadn't spoken to her friends since she had stormed out last night. Nicky had phoned this morning and left a message.

Piper hadn't been ready to talk to anyone yet.

She chewed on her bottom lip as she nervously walked the few houses to Nicky's. She needed to apologize to her friends for running out like she had last night. Plus her dress and Issy's clothes were still there. Piper had left in Nicky's sweatpants.

Piper slowly dragged her feet up the stairs of the house and knocked twice on the door. As she waited for someone to answer, she crossed her arms over her chest and let out a deep breath. Her breath could be seen in the cold November air.

She stood there for a moment before the front door opened for her.

The two women just stared at each other for a moment. They were both shocked to see the other. Piper hadn't been expecting for Alex to answer the door, and Alex hadn't been expecting her to show up.

"Hey," whispered Alex breaking the deafening silence between them.

"Hey," replied back Piper in a slight daze as she continued to look at Alex. "Is Nicky home?"

"No, she isn't. She and Lorna are at work," answered back Alex.

Piper nodded her head as her blue eyes studied Alex's green eyes. They were never really green, she thought. They were different colours depending on the lighting. Right now they were a bluish-green. There was no make-up on her face. Her glasses were sitting low on her nose. Her bottom lip was swollen, and her cheek was slightly bruised, she thought. Piper's brows fused together in confusion at this.

It looked like someone had hit her.

"Did someone hit you?"

Alex's eyebrows flew up her forehead as she self-consciously touched her cheek. "Yeah, Wren," she answered honestly. She then pushed her glasses up on the bridge of her nose and looked back nervously at Piper. She couldn't really tell what the blonde was thinking.

Piper's blue eyes widened slightly in surprise at this. Never before had she heard of someone trying to take a hit out on Alex. She was a very dangerous person to mess with, she thought. Wren had some nerve.

"Are you okay?" she asked after a moment had passed.

Alex shrugged her shoulders in response, "Yeah...I kinda deserved it."

"Look...Alex...If it's about what happened last night..." Piper didn't know how much Alex knew about what had gone down between her and that skank of a girlfriend of hers.

Alex who could sense where Piper was going, interjected, "Pipes, you don't have to apologize. She didn't slap me because of you... She was angry at me because I ended it."

Piper was surprised to hear this. She didn't know really how Alex felt about Wren, but she had thought it had been sort of serious from the way she had walked back into Alex's life. Alex must have had felt something for the girl, she thought, even though she was a major bitch.

"I'm sorry to hear that," murmured Piper as she ran a nervous hand through her ponytail.

Alex couldn't help but smirk slightly at this. "Like fuck you are."

Piper couldn't help but smile back at this. "You're right, I'm not. She was a fucking bitch!" she admitted.

Alex nodded her in reply to Piper. "She is a bitch."

A blanket of silence then fell over the two ex-lovers again as they once again looked deeply into each other's eyes, neither knowing what to say. A moment or two passed before the quiet was broken.

"Do you want to come in?"

Piper once again looked at Alex in shock. She was very tempted to go in, but at the same time, it didn't feel right. Nervous butterflies fluttered in the pit of her stomach as she once again just looked deeply into Alex's green eyes.

"I should go," she whispered as she looked slightly over her shoulder towards the street. "Tell Nicky I stopped by." The blonde then began to turn away from Alex.

However, Alex wasn't going to allow her to leave so soon. She was tired of this little dance that she and Piper kept on doing. Now that Wren was out of the picture, Alex had realized her feelings for the blonde. She had always known they were there, but it wasn't until last night that it hit her. She wanted to be with Piper again. She was the only thing truly that made her happy, and she wanted to be happy again.

Taking a step forward, Alex reached out and grasped Piper's wrist.

Piper immediately turned around at this and locked eyes on Alex. A spark of something coursed through both of them at this. This was the first time they had touched in years. Time seemed to stand still as blue washed into green. Both women's hearts were racing suddenly.

"Can we talk?" asked Alex in a low voice. Her green eyes looked deeply into Piper's face.

Piper continued to look at Alex before she found herself nodding her head in reply.

"Okay," she murmured.

xxx

Alex led Piper into the kitchen and told her to take a seat at the breakfast bar.

"Do you want tea or anything?" she asked as she looked over her shoulder at Piper. Before the blonde had knocked on the door, she had been making herself a cup of tea.

"Sure," whispered Piper nervously as she lifted herself up onto the barstool and looked at Alex's back.

No one dared to speak a word as Alex busied herself by pulling another mug down from the cupboard and began to fix them each a tea. "You still take honey?" asked Alex as she placed a steamy mug in front of Piper.

Piper looked down at the tea before meeting Alex's eye. She was at a loss for words at this question. Yes, she still did, but she couldn't seem to get the simple word to stick to her tongue. So she just nodded her head slightly at Alex as she downcast her eyes and looked down into the brown liquid.

Alex smiled slightly at the blonde's nervousness before she opened one of the cupboards and pulled down a bottle of liquid honey. She then returned back to where Piper was sitting, holding her own mug of tea and the bottle of honey. She placed them down at the same time as she took the seat across from Piper.

Piper looked up at this and smiled slightly at Alex. "Thanks," she murmured, suddenly finding her voice as she took the honey.

Not a word was exchanged for another few minutes as both women drank their teas in silence. They were both trying to wrap their brains around what was happening at the moment. This was the first time they had been alone in a room really in months, it seemed.

"Look, about last night," Alex began to speak as she put her mug down and looked intensely across the table at Piper. "I don't know what Wren said to you to make you upset...but whatever it was. I'm sorry."

Piper, who was in the middle of drinking her tea looked back at Alex as she placed the mug down. She didn't know how to respond to this. She wanted to be mad at Alex for what Wren had said to her, but she knew it wasn't really the brunette's fault that she had a jealous, insecure girlfriend.

"I might have shared too much with her about you and...what happened...but at the time you have to understand I was angry. So fucking angry," continued to explain Alex.

Piper stared deeply at Alex. This was the first time she was hearing about those years in Litchfield after she had broken the brunette's heart. She got it. She wasn't upset with Alex for telling someone about what happened. But she was upset by the fact that Wren had called her daughter a brat.

"She called my daughter a brat," she stated in a whisper. She wanted to tell Alex the other stuff too. How Wren had basically called Alex's love for her was nothing.

Alex pushed back her hair off of her face and looked straight at the blonde. She sat up straight in her seat. "I'm sorry, Pipes," she murmured back, and she meant it. Issy was far from a brat. She was one of the best kids that Alex had ever met.

A moment of silence fell between them as they looked away from each other. It suddenly felt too intimate looking into each other's eyes. There was no bitterness between them and no awkwardness, really.

It was just them.

Alex and Piper, again.

Alex suddenly found herself reaching out for Piper's hand, which had been resting on the surface of the table and took it.

Piper's attention immediately snapped back to Alex at this. She looked down at where Alex's fingers were interlocked with hers and back up at her face. She found herself holding her breath.

"Look, I know I said that it would be better if we were just friends...but after being with Wren and everything. I realized something, kid. I still love you," Alex's heart was racing with nerves as she continued to peer at Piper. She couldn't tell what the blonde was thinking, but she hadn't pulled her hand away yet, which was good.

"I don't think I ever stopped loving you. But after you...slept with Larry. I was angry. I fucking hated you. I was in a bad place in my life again. Everywhere in Litchfield reminded me of you...of us. I was lonely and mad. And then Wren came. And she made me happy, or I thought she did. But that's not the point...because I realized something last night..."

"What's that?" asked Piper in a whisper.

"I love you, and I'm tired of fucking running from it..."

"But?"

Alex cocked an eyebrow before letting out a sigh. "But...I don't know if I can be with you...after what happened last night...I don't know if I can trust you again..."

Piper hated to hear this, but she knew it was the truth. She had broken Alex's heart way too many fucking times. She wouldn't trust her either. She nodded her head slowly in understanding at this. She didn't say anything as she looked down at Alex's hand, which was still holding hers.

"But I fucking want to be with you..." whispered Alex. She was leaning slightly in as she gazed into Piper.

Piper's head snapped up and locked eyes with Alex's again. She let out a deep breath before responding. "Look, Alex, I get it. I do. I wouldn't fucking trust me either after what I did to you, and I'm sorry about all that. But there is something you need to know too, if this is going to work between us," her voice was clear and firm. She wanted Alex to hear this.

"I don't regret that night with Larry... It brought me my little girl."

Alex a few months ago would have hated to hear this. But she had seen the mother in Piper since then. She was good with Issy. And she could see how much she had grown up because of that little girl.

"She's my world...my life now," continued on Piper. "She's never met anyone I have dated." The blonde was thinking about her two past relationships. There had been Joanna who she thought she had loved, but she had been no Alex. And then there was Stephen. They had only dated for five months or so. He had been nice and a good guy. But again, she had found herself comparing him to Alex. "But she met you."

That was saying a lot. That Piper still trusted Alex enough to allow her to meet her daughter. No one spoke another word for a moment as this hung in the air.

"I understand, kid," whispered Alex and she did. She had grown up with a single mother. Her mother had never brought men home to meet Alex, if she hadn't thought that they were the "one."

"I wouldn't ask you to be a second mother or anything to Issy...I know how you feel about kids," continued on Piper. She was thinking more out loud now. She wanted to be with Alex, but there had to be some rules. She didn't want Alex to feel like she was going to be Issy's mother all of a sudden. She didn't want that. Issy had two parents.

"I like Issy," whispered Alex, and she did. She was a cute kid.

"So where does this leave us?" asked Piper, looking at Alex with curiosity. She was more confused than anything now. Alex still loved her, and she loved her too. But she didn't trust her.

"I'm not sure," whispered Alex in response. Just like Piper, she was confused. "I don't trust you."

"And I don't regret sleeping with Larry," stated Piper.

Another blanket of silence fell over the two women as they debated this in their thoughts. Everything that needed to be said had been said. There was no turning back now. They could only move forward, but how?

"I'm in," whispered Piper as she took her free hand and laid it on top of Alex's, which was still holding her other one. "I'm all in. I love you, and I want to be with you, too."

Alex just blinked at Piper for a moment before her face broke out into a small smile. She then took her other hand and like Piper had done, put it on top of hers. Their hands were now piled on top of each other's like they were making an oath of some sort.

"I'm in," she whispered.

Piper smiled shyly back at Alex at this. She was suddenly overcome with excitement and happiness. She couldn't help but feel like she was twenty-two again as she looked into those eyes, which were now a deep, almost emerald green in the lighting of the kitchen.

* * *

><p>Thanks for reading and please leave a review!<p>

Julie


	17. Chapter 16

Do not own Orange Is the New Black or any of the characters.

So I'm putting a big warning on this chapter...it's not an easy one. And I know some people had brought up that the last chapter was a little up and down regarding Piper's emotions. I did try to iron some of that out in this chapter here. I don't want to give too much away but a lot of the issues that were dealt with in Snowflakes are brought up here.

But thanks to everyone who took the time to read and review, good and bad I appreciate hearing from you all! :)

* * *

><p><span><strong>Rainstorms<strong>

_**Chapter 16**_

_One Step Forward, Two Steps Back_

_November 2021_

The room had gone very quiet suddenly as the two women continued to study each other.

Their hands were still lying on top of one another in the middle of the table. They were both a little unsure of what to do next. Their hearts were both racing with nerves and anticipation.

Piper watched Alex intensely as she slowly licked her lips. She desperately craved to kiss her but at the same time was shy about it. She still felt unsure about what to do about her and Alex. Sure, they had both agreed to try and be together again. But the road ahead seemed to be a foggy one. There was still something she sensed that Alex hadn't told her. However, all these thoughts of uncertainty and such faded away quickly as Alex lifted her hips off of the edge of the chair and leaned over the table. Her face was now a mere inches away from her own. Their eyes locked briefly before their lips met. It was timid at first as they adjusted to the feel of each other again.

Alex pressed her lips softly into Piper's again and again. Her nose and glasses were nuzzling slightly into Piper's cheek but the blonde didn't care. Piper only had one thing on her mind now and it was the feeling of Alex's warm mouth against her own.

Their lips broke a part slightly before crashing against each other again. This time it was rougher and filled with hunger as old feelings began to resurface. Lips opened and closed against one another. Tongues met with fire and twisted together in greeting. It was all heat and passion between the two women as they were reunited.

They continued to kiss for a few moments longer before breaking apart. Alex's back and legs were aching from the way she was arching herself over the table. The two women smiled sheepishly at each other as they caught each other's eye. They were both feeling so alive at the moment as their hearts beat with excitement. The kiss had been something else.

Kissing each other had always been good between them but after years of being apart, it had felt like heaven.

Their bodies craved more, desired more of the other's touch.

However, they were still a little unsure on how to proceed. They both didn't want to rush in to anything, just yet. This was really only the beginning of settling things between them.

Piper touched her swollen lips as Alex began to clear the mugs from the table and put them in the dishwasher. She could feel her cheeks flushing as butterflies fluttered in her stomach. It had been a while since she had felt like this. She continued to watch Alex for a moment longer before dropping her gaze onto the surface of the table. Alex had just caught her looking at her. The blonde blushed again at this. She couldn't help but feel confused. Yes, she was happy but the sadness from last night still lingered. She still wanted to talk to Alex about it.

Alex smirked slightly at Piper and her shyness. It was amazing how in the matter of minutes things could change from bad to good. Her face stung from their previous activity but she didn't care. She welcomed the pain. It was worth it to feel the softness of Piper's moist lips against her own. She had always loved kissing Piper, amongst other things.

She couldn't wait to do it all over again.

However, there was something nagging at the back of her mind. The image of Pennsatucky suddenly filled her thoughts. She knew she had to tell Piper what she had done all those years back. If they were truly going to make this work between them, they needed to be honest.

Piper had already been honest with her and as much as it hurt for her to hear about that night with Larry, Alex was glad that she had told her. Alex hated being lied too. She rather hear the honest truth then some sugar-coated lie just so her feelings didn't get hurt. And she knew that Piper deserved that from her.

For it was a big fucking lie to keep from her. She knew she had kept it for years now, especially when they were together at Litchfield. What difference did it really make now? she thought. But it made all the difference and she knew it. For the guilt would always eat away at her.

Like it was now as she looked on at Piper who was staring back at her and smiling.

Alex forced a smile on her face. She wanted to be happy, she truly did and a part of her was. But at the same time, she was nervous and confused. She didn't know how to proceed with all this.

She agreed to try with Piper. She had said she was all in and she was. And with being all in, she needed to tell her. She didn't want to start off on bad footing with Piper this time around.

She wanted no past baggage.

She wanted a fresh start.

* * *

><p><em>November 2020<em>

Alex was sitting on her bunk reading when the Russian cook approached her.

Her green eyes looked up from her page and up at Red. Alex smiled in greeting to the older woman as she closed her book and sat up. "What's up?" she asked as she swung her long legs over the side of the bunk and touched the floor.

"Nothing much," replied the cook with a slight smile on her face. "Just thought I would come and see you."

Alex cocked an eyebrow at Red at this. "Why?" she asked. Red only came to see her really if she had a message from Nicky to give her or something else. She didn't just come and make small talk.

Red just smirked at Alex like she was a three year old asking why the sky was blue. The brunette always seemed to be questioning the older woman, even after spending so much time in Litchfield together. Alex was still questioning her motives.

"I dunno," replied Red with honesty, "I'd just haven't seen you much, that's all. Ever since that little tall girlfriend of yours left you been hidden in those books all the time now."

Alex just frowned at this. She had been a little anti-social since Wren had left but she had no interest in meeting others really and socializing. There were only a few more months in her sentence to go and she rather spend them in the comforts of books. She couldn't wait to break free of these walls and start her life again. Nicky had already said she could come live with her and Lorna when she got off in April. Alex still had family in New Jersey but she had to stay in the state for at least a year. Plus, she rather live with Nicky then stay with her Aunt or a halfway house.

"I like to read," shrugged Alex as she placed the book she had been reading on the shelf and stood up.

"I like to read too but you put reading on a whole new level," stated Red with a chuckle towards Alex. "Nicky says you are going to live with her."

Alex turned to look at Red at this. She slowly crossed her arms over her chest and nodded her head in reply. She couldn't help but smile at the thought of living with Nicky. She still visited but it wasn't the same. It would be nice sharing the same space together, she thought. She missed the bushy blonde and her squeaky, Italian girlfriend.

"That's good. She misses you," stated Red in a matter-of- fact voice. She knew that both of her daughters missed each other. Visits helped some but it wasn't the same. Red couldn't wait herself to get out of Litchfield herself. She missed her husband and her sons. Visits were rare now from them.

Alex just nervously adjusted her glasses on the bridge of her nose as she looked on at Red at this. She knew that the Russian Cook missed Nicky just as much as she did. It was one of the things that they had in common. Their love for the sarcastic bushy haired woman.

* * *

><p><em>November 2021<em>

"Look there's something I need to tell you," whispered Alex softly towards Piper. She nervously touched the side of her glasses as she peered over at Piper.

The two of them were seated on the bright floral couch, facing each other. It was a mere minutes later. Alex couldn't keep it in any longer. The longer she looked at Piper the more she knew she had to tell her. She knew it was going to be a blow to Piper, a sudden one at that.

Piper stared on at Alex, waiting for her to continue, "Okay."

Alex nervously licked her lips as she pushed her glassed up on top of her head and continued to look into Piper's blue eyes. Her heart was beating rapidly with anxiety. She had told herself long ago that she would never tell Piper what she was about to tell her. But she had been honest with her and if they were ever going to make this work, they needed to be completely honest with each other. She knew it wouldn't be easy by any means.

"Do you remember when you told me about Pennsatucky and...what Healy had said about us kissing?"

Piper's brows fussed together in confusion at this. Why was Alex suddenly bringing that up? she thought as she continued to look on at Alex before slowly nodding her head. "Of _course_."

"You told me that Pennsatucky had snitched on us to Healy and that's why...he had done what he did..." Alex's voice trailed off slightly. She didn't know why she was explain everything detail to Piper. Of course, she knew what she was talking about. Piper probably remembered everything from that day, from that whole month.

Piper continued to look on at Alex with puzzlement. She wasn't understanding why Alex was bringing this up?

"You didn't want to tell me but I forced it out of you. You made me promised that I wouldn't do anything to Pennsatucky..."

"What the fuck did you do?" snapped Piper in a low voice. Her blue eyes pierced into Alex. She wanted answers. This was the first time she was hearing about Alex doing something. She remembered making Alex promise not to go after Doggett. She knew Alex had been upset over Healy and was even more pissed off at Pennsatucky. She had wanted revenge for her but Piper hadn't. She had just wanted to put it all behind her.

A deafening silence fell over the two of them for a second as they continued to look at each other. Alex hated the look on the blonde's face at the moment. This was exactly the reason why she hadn't wanted to tell Piper in the first place.

"Look..." began to explained Alex only to be cut off by Piper again.

"What the fuck did you do, Alex?!" Piper didn't want any sugar-coated answer. She wanted the truth. She was trying to rack her brains on what had happened after that conversation between her and Alex. Nicky had interrupted them she remember and she had gone back to the dorms to sleep but that was it. She hadn't seen Alex until much later at dinner time...

_"Yo, where've you been Vause? Dinner is almost over," asked Nicky as Alex dropped into the empty seat beside her. _

_Alex just shrugged, murmuring something about being busy at work. She avoid meeting her friend's eye as she began to eat quickly from her tray. Shoving fork full after fork full of food into her mouth. _

_Nicky, just narrowed her eyes at Alex for a moment. She didn't believe her. She knew something else had come up and that started with a capital P and ended with a Y but she say anything. This wasn't the time and place to bring it up. She continued to a peer at Alex for a second longer before glancing over at Piper who was seated across from her. She gave the blonde a slight smile before turning her attention onto her own food. _

_Piper's blue eyes looked between the two woman before settling on Alex's face. _

_Alex, who noticed her staring just gave her a tight smile back. She then reached across the table to where Piper's hand lay and gave it a squeeze. Her green eyes lingered on Piper for a second before longer before dropping to her tray. _

_"You need to eat, Pipes," whispered Alex as she took in the untouched tray in front of Piper. She had one problem solved but the biggest one had yet to be handled. Piper was still in need of help. She was still fucked up over everything. _

_Piper didn't say anything as she met Alex's eye. "Where were you?" she asked in a whisper. She could sense that Alex hadn't been held up suddenly at work to make her later for dinner. She had been doing something else that she didn't want to tell her about. Her brows were fussed together as she continued to look at Alex, waiting for her answer. _

_"Like I told Nicky," replied Alex, not missing a beat. "I got caught up in the laundry room. One of the meth head decided to over flow one of the machines with detergent and guess who had to clean up the mess?" Her face broke out into a grin at this. She knew she never lied to Piper before. She had always been honest with her since day one. And she took pride in this. But she knew she couldn't possibly tell Piper the truth. Especially, after promising the blonde that she wouldn't do something stupid and go after Pennsatucky. _

_Well, she didn't think she had done anything stupid but she knew that Piper would see it differently. _

_Piper held Alex's gaze for a second before returning the smile. She wanted to believe her. She gave Alex's hand a squeeze before picking up her fork and stabbing a piece of meatloaf with it. She then brought it up to her mouth and took a bite. _

_"Happy?" she asked through a mouthful of food._

_Alex couldn't help but laugh at this. A wave of relief washing over her at this. She was glade that Piper had chosen to believe her lame story and not to push the matter further. _

_"Very much!" she whispered as she brought Piper's hand up to her lips and gave it a quick kiss. _

Alex just looked blankly at Piper for a second before looking away. She desperately wanted to take Piper's hand but knew it wouldn't help matters. The blow was going to be hard any way she told it. She might as well go full steam ahead, she thought.

"I cornered her," whispered Alex as she slowly brought her attention back onto Piper. "I threatened her. I was mad. So fucking mad at her and at Healy. For what they had both done to you. I wanted revenge."

"Did you rape her?" whispered Piper, afraid to hear the answer.

Alex licked her lips nervously yet again. She didn't know how to response to this. She still wasn't sure after all these years what she had _really_ done to Pennsatucky.

"Alex...did you rape her?" Piper's voice was filled with emotion as she continued to look on at Alex, waiting for her answer.

"I called her out on her shit...I only wanted to scare her and make her leave you alone for once...but things went too far...I wanted her to feel the same fear you had felt in Healy's office...give her a taste of her own medicine...Look, I'm not proud of what I did, Pipes. I hated myself afterwards. But it was the only thing I could think of to stop Pennsatucky from bothering you," Alex's voice was low as she finished explaining. Her green eyes pierced into Piper, who was looking away from her now and across the room. She couldn't see her face and she hated that. They had been so close before to each other, only to take two steps back now.

She hated how they could never get it right.

"Say something," whispered Alex after a moment had passed. She just wanted Piper to yell or do something to her, the silence was killing her.

"Tell me exactly what you did..." she whispered as she slowly turned and glanced over at Alex. Her tone and facial expression were dead serious. She wanted to know exactly what Alex had done to Pennsatucky.

"Look, I don't think that's a good idea," whispered Alex as she ran a hand through her hair and placed her glasses back onto her face.

"Alex."

"Okay."

Another moment of silence fell between them before Alex slowly began to retell Piper the details of what had gone down between her and Pennsatucky in the laundry room. "I had her pinned up against one of the laundry machines...I groped her...I pressed my body up against her...towering her...She couldn't escape...I ran my hands down her body and cupped her though her pants...it lasted five minutes before I realized what I was doing..."

Piper didn't know what to say to this. Tears filled her eyes as she thought about what Healy had done to her. It was basically the same thing that Alex had done to Pennsatucky. "I can't believe this..." Her voice trailed off as she suddenly rose to her feet. She couldn't look at Alex. It hurt to much as a mix of emotion ran through her body. Piper would never wish what had happened to her on anyone else. Healy might had not physically raped her but he had emotionally. He had cornered her like an animal. She still couldn't stand the thought of being locked in a room. She always had to have the door open.

"I can't believe this..." she whispered again as she buried her face into her hands.

Alex had never hated herself more than she did at this very moment. She swore underneath her breath as she continued to watch Piper from the couch. She could tell that the blonde was barely holding it together. Pursing her lips, she stood up from her seat. She then slowly began to walk towards Piper, who was standing by the fire place. Her back was too Alex.

"Pipes," whispered out Alex as she placed a timid hand on the blonde's shoulder.

Piper immediatly reacted to this. "Do not FUCKING TOUCH ME!" she cried out as she spun around to face Alex and took a step back from her. Her blue eyes were dark with rage.

A look of hurt crossed Alex's face at this but she quickly masked it with concern. A deafening silence fell between the two of them as they continued to stare at each other.

"I can't believe you did that...you _are_ no better than Healy and what he did to me..." Her voice was low as she continued to look on at Alex like she was seeing her for the first time.

Alex opened her mouth to say something in response to this but quickly decided against it. She knew that Piper was right. What she had done to Pennsatucky was no different than what he had done to Piper.

"I can't fucking believe this. I let you in. What Healy had done...it messed me up..."

"I remember," whispered Alex in response to this. She remembered clearly how damaged Piper had been after both incidents with Healy.

"And I let you in...I let you touch me...to love me..." Piper's voice came out a little strain as she continued to process what she had just been told.

"I still love you," whispered Alex. She wanted Piper to understand she had done what she did out of love for her. "I did it because I _love_ you and wanted you to get better...you have to understand I did it because of _you_..."

Piper just gawked at Alex at this. Was she being serious? she thought. "I never asked you too...I didn't want you too! It wasn't your battle to fight. Pennsatucky was my problem...not yours!"

Alex couldn't help but feel a little angry at this. Yes, Pennsatucky might had not been her problem but she didn't care. She had wanted to protect Piper from the hick. "I wanted you to get better...and the only way that was going to happen was if Pennsatucky got taken care of..."

Piper just shook her head in disbelief at this. "I didn't ask you too..." she murmured. "You knew how long it took me to let you touch me...after what Healy had done to me...I couldn't stand another person's touch...but I let you...I trusted you..."

"You can still trust me," whispered Alex in response.

"No I can't," murmured Piper, "I can't let you into my life...knowing now what you have done...I have a daughter..."

"I'm not going to hurt her," replied Alex, "What I did was a one time thing...a one time mistake, Pipes."

Piper just shook her head at Alex, "I can't..."

"I'm not some sort of monster," replied Alex, defending herself. Her eyes shined with tears but she didn't let them fall. "I regretted what I did to Pennsatucky...I still do, every fucking day..."

Piper just once again shook her head at Alex. Tears of anger and sadness filled her eyes as she slowly then looked back up at Alex, "I can't...you're not the person I thought you were."

The blonde's words were like a knife to Alex's heart. She hated how things had fallen apart so quickly between them. Why could it never work? she thought bitterly as she continued to look on at Piper.

"Did you tell Wren what you did?" Piper suddenly needed to know. She was angry and upset and wanted to know what else Alex was hiding from her. "Because she sure _fucking_ knew last night about everything that happened with me!

Alex narrowed her eyes slightly at Piper. "No," she whispered. "I didn't tell Wren anything about what I did. It isn't something I fucking want to brag about!" The only other person who knew was Nicky but she wasn't going to tell Piper that. She wasn't going to throw her underneath the bus too.

Piper's eyes searched Alex's face. She had one point thought she knew who she was but she didn't anymore. She wasn't the person she thought she was. The two women looked at each other for a moment longer before Piper sighed and left the house. She couldn't stand the sight of Alex at the moment. She needed some space to breath and figure shit out.

And Alex let her go.

She knew that there was no way she could change Piper's mind now.

The moment the front door closed loudly behind Piper, Alex picked up the nearest thing, which was a framed photo of Issy as a baby and threw it against the wall. The glass of the frame immediatly broke into a million of pieces as it came into content with the wall.

"FUCK!" screamed out Alex at the top of her lungs. How could it had gone from being so perfect to the pits of hell?

Hot white rage filled her stomach as tears streamed down her face. She hated herself more than ever now. She had fucked up royally. Not just with Piper but as a person. She was a fucking monster, she thought. Her hands were shaking as she looked down at them. Her breathing was laboured and her heart was racing.

She didn't know what the fuck to do.

xxx

Alex heard her phone go off but she ignored it as she continued to smoke out her bedroom window. It was cold and raining heavily outside but she didn't care. She needed to take the edge off. She was chain smoking but her health was the last thing on her mind at the moment.

Piper had just left over an hour ago. Alex desperately wanted to talk to her but knew it wouldn't make a difference. Piper hated her. She had seen that look in her eyes. There had been hatred. There had been disgust. Piper didn't trust her. She thought she was like Healy. That bastard had fucked her up and she thought she had fucked up Pennsatucky. To be honest, she didn't know how more fucked up Pennsatucky was now. She had been pretty fucked up before Alex had gotten to her. Pennsatucky had still continued to be her bible-thumping self after the fact. She had just ignored Alex and Piper.

As she continued to take a drag out of her cigarette, she heard the front door open and close from downstairs.

Nicky and Lorna were home.

She let out a deep breath at this. She was in no mood to put on a bright face around her friends. She hoped that Nicky wouldn't come up here, looking for her. She heard her phone go off again. She barely glanced over her shoulder at the blinking display of the phone, which rested on the bedside table. She was in no mood to talk to anyone at the moment. She didn't know who was texting her but she had a pretty good idea that it was Wren.

She had texted her late last night in a drunken slumber but Alex had ignored it. She was determined to cut her out of her life. There was only one person she wanted to hear from now and the changes were very slim that she would. A million thoughts raced through her mind as she blew a ring of smoke from her lips and extinguished the cigarette into the ashtray, resting on the windowsill.

This was the very reason why she had never wanted to tell Piper what she had done. Piper would flip out. She would see her differently. Which was understandable. What she had done was one of the worse things she had ever done. She wasn't pleased with herself for doing it. But at the time it had been the only thing she could think of to shut Pennsatucky up and get revenge for the blonde, who had been hurting terribly. Alex knew that Piper wouldn't come back to her right away but she hoped that over time, she would.

Ever since that kiss, her heart had been a woken once again to her love for the blonde. And her heart ached now for her. The last time she had felt so heart broken like this had been when Piper had told her she was pregnant. Of course, at the time she had been mad at Piper.

But this time, the only person she was mad at was herself.

xxx

Piper chewed on the skin around her thumbnail as she stared at her naked reflection in the mirror in the bedroom. She never looked at her full body anymore. It wasn't that she was aging badly or anything. She just hated the marks that lined it.

On her stomach there was the stretch marks from her pregnancy. There were the two silver lines to where Taylor had stabbed her with that damn screw driver. Then a little lower were the track marks that were bright against her inner thigh. She couldn't help but trace them now her hand. Each one was a reminder of what had happened to her at Litchfield and how far she had come from then.

It had taken her a good while to get over what had happened to her and to stop harming herself. Alex had been a good portion of that. She had been there for Piper, even when she hadn't wanted her there. She still remember how she had pushed Alex away, after her return from SHU. It had taken her a while to let Alex in. It had been a slow process to say the least.

But after finding out what Alex had done, it had put all those moments together at Litchfield in a different light for the blonde. Even if it was years after the fact. She couldn't get the image of Alex and Pennsatucky together out of her head. She kept on thinking about how Pennsatucky might have felt being trapped like that with Alex towering over her. It just kept on bringing her back to her own feelings with Healy. Ever since then, she had found it hard to be with men, again. When she slept with Larry in comfort it had been familiar in away. He was gentle with her. He had always had been. When they were married they rarely had sex. That physical attraction to each other had faded. And then she had been with Joanna. Sex with her had been good. But when she was with Stephen, it had been difficult for her. Being with a guy who wasn't Larry was hard for her. Not because she was still in love with her ex-husband. But because she hadn't been with another guy, a stranger in away since the incident. It was one of the main reasons she had ended it with him. She couldn't handle the anxiety that came with the sex.

Tears filled her eyes as her heart ached. She wanted to trust Alex. She _had_ wanted to be with her again. She thought back to the kiss. How good it had felt to feel her mouth against her own again. To feel the warmth of her breath against her face. To see that look of desire in those green eyes of hers. It had been wonderful, she thought. But it had all been a lie.

Alex was a rapist, she thought.

The tears then began to fall one by one down her cheeks as an uneasy feeling filled the pit of her stomach as she continued to look at herself in the mirror. She was once again brought back to that day in Healy's office. She could feel his hands on her. The weight of his body pressing into her back side...

Bringing her hands up to her stomach, she pinched the skin hard between her fingers. She bit down on her lower lip as pain washed through her.

Piper didn't know what to feel or think anymore. She felt like her whole word had been turned upside down in away. Alex was not the woman she had fallen in love with all those years ago. Alex had always had a need to protect the people that she loved. There had been countless times in the past when Alex had hit a guy in the face for looking the wrong way at Piper. But this time she had gone to far, thought Piper. Alex had said she had done it for her. Because she loved her. But Piper had never asked her to do this. She hadn't wanted revenge on Pennsatucky. She had just wanted to move past it. She had been tired of fighting with Pennsatucky by that point.

But Alex hadn't listened.

Piper continued to pinch hard at the skin for a moment longer before letting go. She was trying to fight the urge to do worse damage to herself. She could feel her walls slowly falling apart. All those years of trying to recover and accepting herself again where gone. She couldn't get passed the image of Alex being with Pennsatucky. With her being with her, after the fact. Image after image of her and Alex in the chapel filled her mind. She couldn't help but think about how Alex's hands had caressed her body with love and care had been the same hands to assault Pennsatucky.

xxx

"What's wrong with you?" asked Nicky as she noticed Alex's mood.

Alex just glared at Nicky from across the room. She had just come downstairs to get a bottle of water. That was it. She didn't want to be bothered.

"Nothing," she mumbled grumpily like a teenager.

Nicky just looked on at Alex for a moment longer. She knew that something was bothering Alex and not just about what had happened last night. Something else had happened.

Neither women spoke a word as Alex turned her back onto Nicky and opened the fridge door. She quickly retrieved a bottle of water before closing it. She could feel the tears in her eyes, threatening to fall again but she couldn't lose it. Not in front of Nicky. She wasn't ready to tell anyone what had happened between her and Piper. It was all still too fresh in her mind.

However, Nicky wasn't giving up that easily. "Did you talk to Chapman?" she asked. Nicky hadn't been able to get a hold of the blonde the night before and she was worried a little. She also knew that Alex had broken it off with Wren and had wanted to talk to Piper too.

Alex didn't say anything at first as she twisted the cap off of the bottle and drank steadily from it for a moment. She then slowly looked up at Nicky and met her eye. "She came by," she whispered.

Nicky was a little surprised to hear this. She hadn't thought that Piper would show her face, at least not here for a few days. Especially with whatever had gone down the pervious night. "She did?"

"She was looking for you," murmured back Alex as she placed the cap back onto the bottle and looked away from Nicky. Her emotions were running high at the moment.

"And I'm assuming by how you are now...that you guys talked?" replied Nicky as her brown eyes pierced into Alex. She was like an open book at the moment. The brunette was clearly upset about something.

Alex didn't say anything as she clenched the water bottle hard in her hands. She was tense suddenly as she thought back to their conversation just mere hours ago. She hated how she had screwed it up so quickly.

"What happened?" asked Nicky as she took a step towards Alex. Her voice was low. There was no judgement in her voice, just concern.

Alex lifted her face at this and locked eyes with Nicky. They stared at each other for a moment longer, before Alex found herself telling Nicky everything from their conversation to the kiss. She couldn't keep it in any longer. "I told her about Pennsatucky," she whispered in a low sad voice.

Nicky just nodded her head slowly in understanding at this. Nicky wanted to say something to Alex but she didn't know what to say. She assumed that Piper hadn't taken the news lightly.

"She hates me," whispered Alex, "She fucking hates me."

Nicky just continued to look on at Alex, " She doesn't hate you. Piper loves you. She could never hate you."

"You didn't see that look on her face. She compared me to that...fucking bastard! She thinks I'm a monster...I am." Alex's voice was filled with self-loathing. She hated herself more than ever at this moment. Hot tears suddenly then began to fall and she made no attempt to brush them away as she still continued to clench hard at the water bottle in her hands.

Her walls were slowly crumbling down and she didn't know how to stop it.

Nicky walked towards Alex and despite the height difference, she hugged her. Alex didn't hug Nicky back though. She didn't deserve her being nice to her. She didn't deserve anyone being nice to her.

* * *

><p>Thanks for reading.<p>

Julie


	18. Chapter 17

Do not own Orange Is the New Black or any of characters.

Thanks again for everyone who read and reviewed the last chapter. I love hearing from you guys and how you continue to support this little story of mine! :)

* * *

><p><span><strong>Rainstorms<strong>

_**Chapter 17**_

_Stuck_

_November 2021_

Piper could hear someone knocking on her front door.

She frowned slightly at this.

It was late at night, who the hell would be paying a visit at this hour, she thought. Well, whoever it was, she wasn't going to answer it. She sank herself lower into the tub. Some water splashed over the edge and onto the floor as she fully immersed herself into the water.

She squeezed her eyes shut as she held her breath underneath the soapy water. She could hear her heart beat within the drum of her ear. She wasn't trying to drown herself. She just wanted to shut off the world for a bit. She didn't know how long she was underneath the water for, 10 seconds? A minute? She wasn't sure as the need to breathe became too much.

Piper gasped for air as she sat suddenly up in the tub and opened her eyes. Her heart was racing as her lungs suddenly filled with air like a balloon. As she tried to regain her breathing and her pulse to stop racing, she could still hear the knocking at the door.

And then she heard the phone go off in the kitchen.

She frowned at this. She was suddenly worried that something had happened to Issy as she was too busy thinking about the past. The blonde then suddenly rose from the tub and immediately wrapped a towel around herself.

She ignored the phone as her wet feet pounded against the floor of the hallway and made her way to the front door. She was dripping wet as she slowly undid the latch on the door and opened it.

"Finally!" Nicky cried out as her brown eyes locked with Piper's. Nicky immediately lowered her cell phone, which she had pressed to ear. The ringing from the kitchen then suddenly stopped. It had been Nicky trying to get in touch with Piper.

Piper didn't say anything as she continued to look on at her friend.

"What do you want?" she asked in a tired voice.

"I came to check on you," replied Nicky as she pocketed the phone and looked at Piper with concern.

Piper cocked an eyebrow at this as she leaned against the door frame and crossed her arms over her chest. She studied Nicky for a second before it dawned on her. "You fucking knew."

Nicky opened her mouth to say something, but before she could Piper was interrupting her.

"I can't fucking believe this," whispered Piper in a low voice. "I can't believe you fucking knew, and you didn't tell me!" Her blue eyes blazed into Nicky, waiting for an answer.

"Look. I promised Alex I wouldn't."

"Do not say her fucking name around me..." warned Piper. She was trying to keep her voice calm but was struggling. She hated Alex and now Nicky too.

"I can't fucking believe this," she whispered again as a moment passed. Piper looked away from Nicky wide-eyed and down the hallway. She could feel the tears in her eyes again. She couldn't help thinking how everything was a lie.

"She didn't want to tell me...if that makes a difference. I forced it out of her," replied Nicky. She knew that Piper would be upset to hear she had kept such a secret from her, especially with how much closer they had grown over the years.

Piper didn't say anything. It didn't make a difference. She was still completely pissed off at the other woman for keeping such a big thing from her. She stared helplessly at Nicky for a moment before shivering. She was still soaking wet.

She motioned for Nicky to come inside before closing the door behind her. She told Nicky to take a seat on the couch in the living room while she got dressed. She was shaking slightly as she tightened the towel around her body. She wasn't in the mood to entertain anyone at the moment, but she knew that Nicky wouldn't make her talk or at least she hoped not.

Nicky didn't say anything as she watched Piper leave and head down the hallway to her bedroom.

The blonde returned a few moments later with her hair up in a ponytail and wearing a baggy sweatshirt and sweatpants. She looked very young at the moment, thought Nicky as she caught Piper's eye. There was not a stitch of make-up on her face.

"How are you doing?" asked Nicky as she looked over at Piper who was seated on the other side of the couch.

Piper just glared at Nicky. How was she fucking doing? she thought, she was doing shitty. "Why are you even here?" her voice was harsh and probably went against everything her mother had taught her about politeness but she didn't care. Her blue eyes were dark as they looked on at Nicky.

"Piper, I already told you. I came to check up on you," Nicky replied with honesty.

Piper just looked on at Nicky again. "There's nothing to check up on. I'm fine."

"You are not fucking fine."

"Excuse me?" She cocked an eyebrow at this.

"Look, just let it all out," Nicky said. She knew that Piper was hurting. No one would be just fine after hearing that someone they loved had done what Alex had done.

Piper just continued to look at Nicky. "I'm fine." She didn't want to let it all out, she thought as she crossed her arms over her chest.

"Chapman, just cut the bull. I know you are hurting. I can see it in your eyes," explained Nicky. She didn't want to be harsh, but she knew how Piper kept things inside of her. She didn't want the blonde to do anything drastic.

Piper huffed and looked away from Nicky at this. Tears were starting to brim in her eyes. She knew that Nicky was scared that she would hurt herself again, and to be honest she was too. She couldn't seem to get a hold of all the emotions running through her body at the moment. She was so confused with her feelings for Alex.

"I don't know what to think anymore," she whispered after a deafening silence had passed. "I don't fucking know..." Piper's voice broke slightly as her hands clenched at the material of her sweatshirt. Her knuckles were white as she pulled hard on the fabric and twisted it. It was finally then she allowed herself to break completely and stop fighting.

Tears ran down her cheeks.

"I love her..." she whispered so low that Nicky almost didn't hear it.

And that's what hurt the most. She still loved Alex. Even after hearing what she had done to Pennsatucky. She couldn't run from these strong feelings she still had for Alex. Despite what she had said previously to Alex. Yes, maybe this changed things between them forever. Neither of them seemed to be able to get this trust thing right. But it didn't change really how she felt about her. No matter what, she knew she would always in some small, indelible way love Alex.

It would make this so much easier if she just could hate her.

Her feelings felt like a tug-of-war on her heart. She was torn between hating Alex and loving her. She felt frightened, horrified, and helplessly angry.

She felt Nicky's arm wrap suddenly around her and pull her close. Somehow this made Piper cry even harder. Nicky, despite all the mistakes that both she and Alex continued to make with each other, continued to be there for both of them, supporting them with no judgement.

Well, with a little judgement.

"She loves you too," whispered Nicky as she held Piper close to her. "She did it because she loved you..."

Piper let out a small whimper at this. She didn't want to hear that. That Alex had done what she did because of her. Because she loved her. She didn't want to hear it. That someone had suffered because of her. She clamped down her eyes and shook her head slightly as another wave of pain and sadness washed through her.

"I didn't ask her too," she whispered through her tears, "It wasn't her fucking battle."

"She felt like it was though.." Nicky knew that Piper didn't want to hear this, but it had to be said. She knew that Alex wouldn't explain this all to the blonde, and even if Alex had come with her tonight, Piper probably wouldn't have listened. But Nicky knew, Piper would listen to her.

"She didn't think you were strong enough...you were so broken...so fucked up...she just wanted you to get better," whispered Nicky softly in her ear. She was choosing her words carefully. She knew she was treading on thin ice as she tried to explain Alex's motives to Piper.

"And she thought that raping fucking Pennsatucky would help me!" cried out Piper, suddenly furious. She pulled away from Nicky then and rose to her feet.

"She wasn't thinking, that is clear, but she just wanted to stop Pennsatucky from hurting you even more than she already had," continued to explain Nicky. Her brown eyes burned into Piper's back. "She couldn't get to Healy. So she went after Pennsatucky."

"It wasn't her FUCKING BATTLE TO FIGHT!" cried out Piper in pained frustration. That's what made her angry. Alex was always fighting her battles. She always had this need to control things, especially when it came to Piper. She was like a mother protecting her young. She would do anything for her. And this just proved that. However, Piper had never wanted any of this. She had just wanted Alex and the comfort of her love.

"I NEVER ASKED HER TO FUCKING DO IT! I TOLD HER NOT TO!" Tears streamed down her face as she cried out in rage towards Alex. "I NEVER FUCKING ASKED HER!" She stomped her foot and threw her hands up into the air like Issy did when she was upset.

But Piper had a reason to be upset.

Nicky just watched Piper from her position on the couch. She knew that Piper was rattled. Anyone would be. However, that didn't stop her from worrying that Piper would do something serious to herself. The blonde wasn't the best when it came to dealing with emotions. She did impulsive things when upset.

Piper screamed at the top of her lungs in frustration. Her body was pulsing with rage as old feelings resurfaced. She hated how she had been lied to. She hated what Alex had done, especially after what had happened to her. She hated how she felt like she was at Litchfield again, both mentally and physically. She knew she had a support system here and now, but she still felt alone. Her need to cut was strong.

She needed something to do other than just talk to take the edge off. The pain was too much.

She hiccupped loudly as another wave of sobs coursed through her body. She couldn't stand it. She fucking hated this. Everything about her relationship with Alex had been lie. "I FUCKING LET HER TOUCH ME!" she screamed, and she didn't care. "I let her put her hands on me..." Her voice came out in a strained whisper as she was finding it hard to breathe suddenly. Her hands were once again clenching at the material of the sweatshirt. She suddenly lifted the edge up to her face, revealing her stomach as she roughly buried her face into it.

She felt Nicky's hands on her, trying to pull her into an embrace, but Piper lashed out. She didn't want to be touched. "NO!" she screamed as she tried to push the shorter woman away from her.

"Hey, hey..." whispered Nicky as she took a step back and raised her hands slightly, letting Piper know she was backing down.

Piper was retreating back into herself, back to those dark days at Litchfield.

xxx

Alex rubbed her eyes with the back of her hand.

She was down to her last cigarette.

Her breath was stale tasting against her tongue, and the walls of her mouth were like sandpaper. Her eyes were dry and irritated as she blinked. She felt hung-over. But she knew she wasn't.

She was just feeling exhausted- physically and emotionally. She hadn't gotten much sleep the night before. Her dreams had been filled with that bible-thumping hick. But in the dream Pennsatucky morphed into Piper.

Alex looked towards the window of the room, where the sun was peaking through. It had finally stopped raining. She lit up the cigarette and took a long drag from it. Smoking didn't take the edge off or numb her from the world or her thoughts like shooting up had. But it did give her something to do with her hands while she tried to dig through the black tar that was her mind.

Alex let out a slight shiver as she continued to sit in bed in just a white cami. She had forgotten to close the window last night. She made no attempt to get up now though as the cold November air drifted into the room. She deserved the bone-cold chill that was assaulting her skin at the moment.

She didn't deserve the comforts of being warm.

Alex heard her phone go off again as an incoming text came through, but once again she ignored it. She knew it was just Wren like all the other texts she had received the previous day. Wren was feeling guilty about the slap and wanted to get back together with Alex.

Alex had no interest though.

The last forty-eight hours seemed like a week to her. So much had happened. She had been with Wren one moment and then briefly with Piper the next, to now being utterly alone. And she deserved to be alone. How could anyone be with her now, knowing what she had done in a moment of weakness? Plus, she didn't want just anyone now.

She wanted Piper.

And it would be a fucking miracle if Piper wanted her back.

A _fucking_ miracle, she thought as a ring of smoke escaped from her lips.

xxx

Piper moaned slightly as she slowly came out of her deep slumber. It took her a moment or two to figure out exactly where she was, as she lifted her head and her eyes adjusted to the bright morning light coming in from the window.

She was in her living room. She didn't remember falling asleep on the couch, but at some point in the night she must have dozed off.

As she slowly sat up and rubbed the sleep from her eyes. She could hear movement from the kitchen. For a moment she was confused who it was. It was only Saturday, so she knew it wasn't Issy, who wasn't getting dropped off until Sunday. A memory then bubbled up to her. Nicky had come by last night. She wracked her brain trying to remember when or if Nicky had left. Figuring that she hadn't, Piper painfully got to her feet and slowly made her way into the kitchen.

"Morning, Chapman!" greeted Nicky warmly to the blonde as she looked over her shoulder at her. Even years after of being out of Litchfield and knowing each other, Nicky still called Piper by her last name. She would always be Chapman to her. Even when she had been married to Larry for that short period of time.

Piper didn't say anything back as she stumbled into the kitchen and made her way over to the coffee machine, where a fresh pot had been brewed. Opening one of the cupboards, she pulled down a mug and began to pour herself a cup. She probably looked like shit she thought as her head began to pound slightly. Just like how she felt. She caught her appearance briefly in the reflection of the toaster. Her hair was unkempt and wild-looking. It had been in a ponytail, but half of it had pulled away from her head during the night. Her face was blotchy and red in places, and her eyes were puffy and red looking from all the crying she had done the previous two nights. She continued to stand there looking at her warped appearance in the metal of the toaster, her body feeling incredibly sore with tension, before looking away and back at Nicky, who was busy cooking something on the stove.

"What are you making?" asked Piper, her eyes narrowing slightly in curiosity. Whatever it was smelled good she thought as she felt her stomach grumble.

"Omelettes," Nicky answered back with a grin. Surprisingly like Red, Nicky was a pretty good cook. Piper would never have guessed it until Nicky had invited her over the first time to her house after getting out of Litchfield.

"Mmm," Piper murmured in response as she cradled the warm mug in her hands and blew on the steaming surface. She hadn't had omelettes in a while.

"They'll be ready soon," Nicky replied as she turned her back onto the stove. Piper watched her for a moment before slowly taking a sip from her mug and moving towards the kitchen bar. She took a seat on the chair and let out a sigh. It felt weird having Nicky here, cooking for her. She should be at her own house making breakfast for Lorna, not her, she thought.

"Where did you sleep last night?" Piper asked out of the blue as Nicky was transferring the finished omelettes from the frying pan to plates.

"Your bed," Nicky replied. She wagged her eyebrows as she locked eyes with Piper.

Piper just shook her head at Nicky, a small smile creeping across her face.

"Eat up," whispered Nicky as she placed a plate down in front of Piper and took the empty seat beside her.

The two women then sat in silence eating for a moment, the sounds of forks and knives scratching against porcelain filled the room.

"Are you excited about Red coming home?" asked Piper through a mouthful of food and caught Nicky's eye.

Nicky just nodded her head as she met Piper's eye and smiled. She was definitely looking forward to it. The Russian Cook would be coming home just before Christmas. As soon as Nicky had gotten word she had started to plan a big homecoming celebration for her.

Piper couldn't help but smile back. She was happy to hear that Red was finally out of Litchfield. That woman had served a very long sentence. She would inevitably have a hard time adjusting to the world, but Red would have a strong support system. Nicky, she knew would be there for Red just like she had been for all of them when they had gotten out.

Piper just continued to watch Nicky. It still amazed her at times how big of a heart she had. When she had first met Nicky, she had been sarcastic and smug. She pretended to be all tough and not give a real shit about anything. However, that was the farthest thing from the truth. Nicky Nichols was a softy, deep down. She cared greatly for the people in her life. She had been there for Piper more times than she could count, not only with what had happened at Litchfield but after too.

Especially with last night and coming to see her.

Yes, she had been furious at first, hearing that Nicky had known about Alex and Pennsatucky and had kept it from her. But she knew if she had been told by anyone else but Alex, she wouldn't really believe it.

"Thank you," whispered the blonde as she suddenly slid her hand across the table and touched Nicky's wrist.

Nicky focused her brown eyes onto Piper at this. She looked on at her in confusion for a moment before smiling. She knew that Piper wasn't just thanking her for breakfast but for staying with her last night and listening to her. She studied the blonde for a second, taking in her appearance. Piper's skin was pale and dull-looking. There were dark bags underneath her once bright blue eyes. She looked like death. She assumed that the blonde hadn't gotten much sleep over the past few days with everything that had happened from Wren to yesterday. And probably wouldn't be getting anytime soon, either.

Another moment of silence passed as Piper withdrew her hand and once again began to eat her omelette again. She suddenly felt shy underneath Nicky's gaze. She couldn't tell what was on her friend's mind, but she had a pretty good idea. Nicky once again had that amused, smug look of hers on her face.

"I saw that scrapbook of yours," stated Nicky slowly. "Quite the little time capsule of you and Vause."

Piper dropped her fork in surprise at this. The sound of it hitting the plate rang out loudly as Piper glared at Nicky. She had been looking at the scrapbook earlier last night before Nicky had dropped by.

Nicky just continued to smirk at Piper. "Man, you guys were fucking young."

Again, Piper didn't reply as she suddenly rose to her feet and began to clear her plate. She knew what Nicky was doing, and she wasn't going to allow her that satisfaction by answering her.

Nicky continued to watch Piper for a moment as the woman busied herself with loading the dishwasher.

"You should talk to her."

Piper leaned against the counter for a moment, closing her eyes and taking a deep breath before looking back over at Nicky. "I told you I'm not going to do that."

"Why the fuck not? You said so last night that you still love her, and I'm pretty fucking sure that she loves you too. You were going to get back together anyways," spoke Nicky slowly.

"That was before..." whispered Piper harshly at Nicky.

"Alex regrets it," answered Nicky.

"So what! It still doesn't change anything!" Piper cried back. She didn't see why Nicky kept pushing this on her. "I can't be with her, knowing what she has done..."

"It was years ago now," Nicky continued.

"So fucking what! Does that mean I should fucking forgive Healy just because it was a few years ago now!" Piper was furious. She hated how Nicky continued to push her to talk to Alex. She wasn't going to.

"Look, I'm not saying what Alex did was right. But I do think she deserves a second chance. You both have fucked up majorly, but what is always consistent is your love for each other," Nicky continued on. "You said so last night that you loved her."

Piper quickly looked away from Nicky and latched her eyes onto the floor. She could feel the tears coming on again. She was so fucking confused on what to do. A part of her wished she could just forget and give Alex a second chance. But at the same time, she didn't know how to.

* * *

><p><em>January 2021<em>

Issy screamed with glee as Lorna chased her down the hallway of the house. Piper couldn't help but smile at the sight before looking over at Nicky, who was shutting the door.

"Happy New Year, Chapman!"

"Happy New Year, Nichols!" Piper replied back playfully. She knew how she hated to be called by her last name.

Nicky just laughed at Piper before motioning her to come into the kitchen, where Lorna and Issy already were. The three-year-old had only been there for a mere minute and was already talking Lorna's ear off. The Italian woman just laughed and nodded her head along with what Issy was saying.

"Do you want coffee or tea?" Nicky asked over her shoulder to Piper as she made her way further into the kitchen.

"Tea please," replied Piper as she took a seat at the breakfast table beside her daughter.

Issy smiled up at her mother before turning her attention back onto Lorna and began to chatter away again about her day. Piper looked at the little girl, brushing some of her hair out of her face.

A few moments passed before Nicky slid a steamy mug of tea in front of Piper and another down in front of Lorna. Lorna looked up at Nicky at this and smiled. Piper then watched at the couple shared a brief kiss before Nicky went to go get her own mug. It still amazed her how they were together. What had started off as what she could only assume was a prison hook-up had developed into a full-fledged relationship years after. It made her heart fill with warmth at seeing her friends together. Nicky and Lorna had definitely found their perfect match in each other.

She hoped that she would be so lucky one day to find what they had. She was currently seeing someone at the moment, but she didn't see it working out.

"So did I tell you the big news?" asked Nicky as she came back to the table.

"No, what big news?" asked Piper in reply as she blew on her tea and looked over to Nicky.

Nicky just smirked like she always did when she had a trick up her sleeve.

"What?" asked Piper. "Are you guys finally going to get married?" Her face brightened slightly as she looked between Lorna and Nicky, who both laughed and shook their heads.

"No, not yet," Lorna replied as she caught Nicky's eyes before looking over at Piper.

"Then what's the news?" asked Piper as she took a sip of her tea.

"Vause is getting out!" Nicky wagged her eyebrows as she smirked again at Piper. They hadn't talked about Alex much over the years. Piper knew that Nicky still kept in touch with her ex and visited Litchfield every other week or so. But they didn't try to make Alex a point of discussion.

Piper couldn't help but look surprised at this. She straightened her back slightly as she tried to process this news. She had known at one point roughly when Alex would be getting out. She knew that Alex had gotten a shorter sentence because she had provided some names, including her own, and had roughly eight years to complete. She guessed that it would be soon. But again, she had not made a point to remember it. It had been almost four years since they had last spoken.

"When?" Piper found herself asking despite kind of not wanting to know.

"April," answered back Nicky with an amused expression on her face.

* * *

><p><em>November 2021<em>

The bar was dark as Alex made her way through the crowd to an empty stool. The moment she slid into the seat, the bartender came towards her.

"What can I get you?"

Alex immediately snapped her eyes up at this and stared at the bartender for a second. It had been so long since she had been to a bar it seemed. She felt a little out of place for a moment. But noting the irritated look slowly creeping upon the bartender's face, she quickly got over her nerves at being out and ordered her self a sidecar.

The bartender didn't blink or give Alex a second look before beginning to make her drink.

She licked her chapped lips slowly as she looked around the room. The bar was quiet for a Saturday night, she thought. However, she didn't linger on this fact to long before her attention was once again drawn onto the bartender, who had just put her drink down in front of her.

She didn't bother to thank the bartender as he was already walking away from her. Alex then immediately reached for the drink and began to drink slowly from it. The strong taste of the alcohol was welcoming against her lips.

She had come to the bar to numb the pain that was crushing her heart. She hadn't talked to anyone all day except for Lorna when she was leaving the house. Lorna, who didn't know what was going on exactly, had told her that Nicky was still over at Piper's. Alex wasn't surprised that Nicky had gone over to check up on Piper. She was glad that Piper had someone to turn to, even if it wasn't her this time.

Alex didn't know what she was going to do now. As much as she wanted to see Piper and talk to her, she knew that she couldn't.

She wouldn't.

She had to wait until Piper came to her, if she ever came to her. She wasn't sure at this point if the blonde would. What she had done was unforgiveable to Piper. And she knew if she was in her shoes, she _fucking_ wouldn't want anything to do with her either.

Tears stung the back of her eyes as she thought about Piper. There had been a few screwed up things she had done in her life, but this was the worse. She hated herself, so fucking much. She took another long sip from her sidecar as she thought about what all this meant now.

She had not only screwed up royally with Piper, but also with everyone else. She couldn't stand to think of what Nicky thought of her. The woman had never showed judgement towards her after all these years. But she couldn't help but think that Nicky would change her mind on that factor after growing such a close relationship with Piper and her daughter. Alex was an outsider in a way to the foursome. Yes, Nicky and she were friends. But she had a stronger friendship with Piper now it seemed. The two of them had grown extremely close over the years that Alex had been away. They had helped each other after Litchfield and Nicky had delivered Piper's daughter. As much as she had hated it at the beginning, they were a family. A family she was no longer a part of. She was just a distant cousin visiting for the weekend or something.

Alex let out a heavy sigh as she finished off the drink and signalled the bartender for another one. She wasn't buzzed enough she thought. She planned on getting extremely drunk tonight.

As a new drink was placed in front of her, she couldn't help but think if it was better if she just left. With her still being at the house, Piper probably wouldn't come by now. Which wasn't fair to Nicky and Lorna, she thought. They shouldn't have to pay for something she had done.

This had been her mistake. It was her problem. And no one should have to pay for it but herself.

It would be better for everyone if she just moved out and left. She was still on parole, which meant she couldn't leave the state. But she didn't know anyone else really in the city. She did have a cousin who lived in Buffalo. She could always go there. She knew her parole officer wouldn't like it very much if she moved suddenly, especially if that meant she would have to quite her job. But that was really her only option. She didn't have enough money to live on her own yet.

And the city was so small. She was bound to run into Piper eventually if she stayed.

Alex cradled the drink in her hands as she pondered all of this.

* * *

><p>Thanks for reading and more to come soon!<p>

Julie


	19. Chapter 18

Do not own Orange Is the New Black or any of characters.

So it might not seem like it but this story is soon coming to an end. After this, there will only be two chapters left.

* * *

><p><span><strong>Rainstorms<strong>

_**Chapter 18**_

_Bye Bye Miss American Pie_

_November 2021_

"What the fuck?" said Nicky loudly to herself as she noticed two envelopes lying out on the kitchen counter. It was Sunday morning as she came downstairs. She had gotten home late last night from Piper's. She planned on going back over sometime today to check up on her. Especially now with Issy coming home in the afternoon. She knew that Piper wouldn't do anything while her daughter was there, but she just wanted to make sure. The blonde was still in rough shape.

Rubbing her eyes slightly, she reached for the first envelope, which was addressed to her and Lorna. It was written in Alex's handwriting. A sense of dread washed over Nicky at this. She hadn't seen Alex since Friday when she had stood in the kitchen crying. She frowned slightly as she began to open the envelope. There was a folded piece of paper inside, along with a key. Nicky pocketed the key into the pocket of her sweatpants before unfolding the paper.

There was just a simple message written on it.

_As you probably are assuming by now, I have left. _

_It is easier this way. For everyone. _

_I'm sorry. _

_Both you of have been so good to me these past few months, and for that I will always be grateful. You not only allowed me into your home, but also your life. But as you know, I have fucked up majorly. I don't want to be a burden to you any longer. You already had a family here before I came, and I don't want to screw that up. No one should have to pay for my mistakes but me. _

_So I am leaving – well, by the time you read this, I have already left. _

_Please do not try to call or anything. I don't want to be found. _

_Again, I'm sorry. _

_Alex _

"Fuck, Vause!" swore Nicky underneath her breath as she read over the note for the second time. She had to admit, it didn't come as a big surprise that Alex had left. However, she was a little pissed off that Alex hadn't at least said goodbye in person instead of in some stupid note.

Her eyes scanned over the note one more time before looking over at the second envelope lying on the counter.

It was addressed to Piper.

* * *

><p><em>April 2021<em>

Alex couldn't believe that it was finally her time.

There had been a point when she hated to see people leave Litchfield. It had only reminded her of how much time she still had left. However, not today. This time, it was her time to leave.

She promised herself she wouldn't cry though as she looked around the rec room which was decorated in her honour. It was her going-away party. So many times she had stood in the very same room and watched others as they said their goodbyes. It kinda felt surreal to her now as the song "American Pie" played from the radio and people sang along to the famous song. She knew most of the people here but not personally. They weren't her close family like Nicky and Piper had been.

They were just people she said "Hi" to while waiting in line for the showers or maybe shared a sly remark with in the hallway.

She wouldn't miss any of them, she thought as she continued to take in her surroundings. The only person she would truly miss would be Red. Over the last eight years she had become like a mother to Alex. She had held her hand while she cried over Piper cheating on her with Larry. She had always helped Alex keep her head above water in Litchfield. She had been good to her.

Alex wished there was something she could do for Red to show her gratitude, but she didn't know what. She had tried to make something for the Russian Cook, but Alex had never been good with her hands. She had tried to write a letter, but that hadn't worked out either. Words failed her when it came to writing them down on paper.

Alex had never been really good when it came to goodbyes.

* * *

><p><em>November 2021<em>

Piper smiled tiredly at Nicky as she let her into the apartment. It was a little later in the evening.

"Where's the kid?" Nicky asked as Piper closed the door behind her.

"Issy's sleeping," replied Piper as she began to lead Nicky into the kitchen. Issy had been dropped off a couple of hours ago by Larry. Piper was happy to have her little girl home, but at the same time, she was scared that she would do something that would haunt the child forever. She didn't want her daughter to be exposed to the ugliness that lived in Piper's mind.

She wanted her little girl to stay just that, a little girl.

"Do you want a tea or something?" asked Piper as she began to busy herself around the kitchen. She wasn't really sure why Nicky was here. She assumed it was just to check up on her.

"No, I'm not staying," answered Nicky as she stood awkwardly in the door frame of the kitchen. She was just here to drop off the letter.

"Oh," whispered Piper as she looked on at the other woman for a moment.

"I just came to give you this," Nicky explained as she pulled the white envelope from the inside of her leather jacket and handed it over to Piper.

Piper took the envelope in confusion. "What's this?" she asked as she stared down at her name written on the outside of it. She recognized the writing on it. "Nicky! What the fuck is this?" She waved the envelope at Nicky, who was quiet.

"It's from Alex," she stated.

Piper didn't say anything for a moment as she once again looked down at the letter in her hand.

"She's gone," continued to explain Nicky slowly, watching Piper's reaction carefully.

"Gone?"

"She left."

Piper didn't know how to comprehend this. Alex had left? Why? Well, she knew why, but it still seemed shocking to her. "Where did she go?"

"I don't know. She didn't say. She must have left sometime last night. Her room was empty. She had only left that letter for you and a letter to me. She didn't say where she was going. Just that she was sorry," Nicky took a small step towards Piper at this.

Piper just stared at Nicky for a long moment. She didn't know what to think of this. Alex was gone. She had left. She could feel her heart breaking slowly, but she wasn't sure why. She had been the one this time to push Alex away. She had told her that she couldn't be with her. That she wasn't the person she thought she was. But that didn't take the pain away that she was feeling now. Her eyes glossed over with tears, but she tried to blink them away before it was too late. She had promised herself she wouldn't cry anymore. She needed to fucking move on from this. She couldn't continue to be haunted by the past.

Piper, who was still clenching the letter in her hand, turned her back towards Nicky. She placed the envelope down onto the counter and once again began to make herself busy in the kitchen. She filled the kettle with water before plugging it into the wall. She could feel Nicky's brown eyes burning into her back. She knew she wanted her to open the letter.

But she couldn't.

Not with Nicky here, at least.

Just then, the two women were interrupted by a little voice, "Why did Alex leave?" Issy had overheard the whole conversation between her mother and Nicky.

Both Piper and Nicky immediately looked over to Issy who was standing in the door way. She clenched a teddy bear in her arm.

"Baby, what are you doing up?" asked Piper in a tired voice. She ignored the little girl's question. "You're supposed to be sleeping."

"I heard the door," whispered the little girl, afraid that she would get in trouble for eavesdropping on Piper.

Piper just stared at her daughter for a moment before sighing and running a hand through her hair. She didn't have the strength at the moment to deal with her daughter.

"I got it, Chapman," whispered Nicky to Piper before making her way over to Issy. "Come on, Iss, let's get you back to bed!"

Issy allowed for Nicky to pick her up and carry her out of the kitchen and back to her bedroom.

xxx

"Why did Alex leave?" asked Issy as Nicky tucked her into bed.

Nicky just smiled at the little girl, taking her time to answer this question. She knew that Piper wouldn't want Issy to know the real reason why Alex had left. Issy was way too young for that. She brushed some stray blonde hairs off the kid's face and behind her ear.

Issy's brown eyes were focused on Nicky though, waiting for an answer.

"Why did Alex leave?" she asked again.

Nicky couldn't help but chuckle slightly at the kid's determination.

"She left...because...she felt she had to," stated Nicky slowly to the little girl.

Issy pondered this answer for a moment as she continued to look on at her Godmother before asking another question.

"Why? Did she get into trouble?"

"No, she didn't get into trouble," replied Nicky.

"Then why did she leave?" asked Issy again. "Was it because of that mean lady she was with? I don't like her."

Nicky couldn't help but laugh at this. This little girl was so filled with Piper. She didn't have a filter either sometimes. "I didn't like her either," whispered Nicky as if she were telling Issy a secret.

Issy giggled at this. She loved to be told secrets.

"Alex didn't love her," stated Issy in her serious little voice. Her brown eyes pierced into Nicky's.

Nicky couldn't help but cock an eyebrow slightly. She didn't know where that had just come from. Issy all the sudden seemed much older than her four-year-old self.

"She loved my mommy," stated Issy again to Nicky. "That's why mommy is sad, right? Because Alex left. They loved each other."

Nicky couldn't help but admit this. "They did love each other," as she thought back to all those times at Litchfield and what Alex had done for Piper. They still loved each other, deeply.

"Then why did Alex leave?" asked Issy again. She didn't understand why Alex had left if she loved her mom.

"Sometimes you have to leave the ones you love the most," Nicky knew she wasn't explaining it very well, but Issy was too young to get the dark reasons why Alex had just picked up and run.

Issy frowned. She didn't understand why you would leave someone you loved. That didn't happen in fairytales or movies. People always ended up together. The Prince marries the princess, and they live happily ever after. "But why? You love Aunt Lorna, and you aren't leaving, are you?"

"No, kid. I'm not," whispered Nicky, noticing the worried expression suddenly on Issy's face. She had no plans on ever leaving Lorna. Quite, the opposite. She was going to marry her, and they would live happily ever after, just like those movies showed.

xxx

Piper quietly opened the door to Issy's room, making sure the little girl was asleep still. Nicky had left over an hour ago now. She had been hesitant at first about leaving, but Piper insisted she go and be with Lorna.

She would be fine.

She watched the rise and fall of her daughter's chest for a moment longer before shutting the door once again. She then moved towards her own bedroom. She closed the door before making her way to the bed. The room was dark and cold as she stripped down to just her shirt and panties. The sheets were like ice against her skin, but she welcomed the coldness. She pulled the covers up to her hips before reaching over to the bedside table and turning on the light.

A heavy sigh escaped from her lips as she then reached for the letter which rested on the table. It felt heavy in her hand like it was filled with the weight of Alex's heart. She didn't know if she had the strength to read it. She was afraid of what Alex had written. But she was curious all the same. It had been a long time since she had received a letter from her. When Piper had first gotten out of Litchfield they had sometimes written to each other just for fun, like people had done in the olden days. Piper had told Alex it would be romantic. Alex, who wasn't much of a writer, had just huffed at the idea at first. But about a week or so after Piper had left, Alex had sent her a letter.

And tucked neatly up in a shoebox at the back of her closet, she had kept those letters. However, she didn't dare to look at them now. They would just bring her more pain at what had been between them.

Her blue eyes studied the outside of the envelope. She traced each letter of her name with her finger as if she could feel Alex's hand. She sighed as she felt the tears come on. She hated how they could never seem to get it right. Her heart was heavy with sorrow. Yes, she hated what Alex had done, but she hadn't wanted her to leave. Not like this. She should have said goodbye in person, she thought.

She bit down hard on her lip as she tried to gain the courage to physically open the envelope. She continued to sit there for a moment, listening to the lyrics of "American Pie" playing out quietly from the digital radio in the room. This song always made her cry. It made her think of death and the pain that came with losing a loved one. Alex hadn't died, but it felt like that now to Piper. She knew she had been the one to push her away. But it hurt to know that she was gone. That no one knew exactly where she had gone and when she was coming back.

If she was coming back at all.

Piper pushed the unopened letter away and kicked it to the end of the bed. She couldn't do it. She couldn't read what Alex had written. She wasn't ready for this, she thought.

She wasn't ready to say goodbye. Or to open her heart to more heartache. She had enough going on as it was. She didn't need anymore.

Piper curled herself up into a ball and cried into her pillow. Her thoughts were racing as she thought about the brunette. There had been many times when they had parted before. Especially in the early days of their relationship when Alex had been in and out of the country all the time. But she always said goodbye.

And she knew this letter was her way of saying goodbye.

Piper hated the ache in her heart at the moment. She was so confused on what to do about all this. She wanted, had wanted to be with Alex. But after finding out what she had done, she hadn't wanted anything to do with her. But now, knowing Alex was gone and realizing she didn't know if she would ever see her again, Piper couldn't help but want Alex again.

* * *

><p>Yeah...I know, it was sad.<p>

Thanks for reading, though.

Julie


	20. Chapter 19

Do not own Orange Is the New Black or any of characters.

* * *

><p><span><strong>Rainstorms<strong>

_**Chapter 19**_

_Christmas_

_December 2021_

It was Christmas Eve as Piper bundled up her daughter in a lilac winter jacket and matching boots. They were heading over to Nicky and Lorna's for Red's homecoming party. The Russian woman had gotten released earlier that month, but Piper hadn't laid eyes on the old Litchfield cook herself in years.

She was both nervous and excited to see Red.

The two women had kept in touch through letters over the years, but this would be the first time they would be seeing each other face-to-face. And it would also be the first time that Issy would be meeting the beloved Russian.

"Do you remember who I told you would be at the party?" Piper asked Issy as she zipped up her own coat.

"Nicky's Mommy!" answered back the four-year-old as she looked up at Piper and smiled excitedly.

Piper couldn't help but smile at Issy as she wrapped her scarf around her neck. Nicky had been the one to tell Issy that Red was her mom. Piper had just told her daughter that there was a special guest coming tonight, an old friend of hers.

Piper then looked around to make sure she had everything. There was a bag of gifts by the door that needed to be taken. She had also made sure to bring some of that back cream that she knew Red liked so much from work.

"Here," spoke Piper as she handed Issy the box of cream. "Can you carry that for me?"

Issy nodded her head at this. She took the box as best as she could with her gloved hands and cradled it against her stomach. She was always willing to help.

"Thank you," whispered Piper as she pressed a quick kiss to Issy's forehead before slinging her purse over her shoulder and reaching for the bag full of gifts. The two Chapman women then left the apartment.

xxx

"Who's coming tonight?" asked Red as she sat at the breakfast bar and studied Nicky who was in the middle of cooking something.

Nicky looked over her shoulder and grinned at the woman. She still couldn't get over how surreal it was to have Red finally here in her house. Nicky had visited Red a couple of times over at her own house where she was living with her husband, but this was the first time that Red was over here at Nicky's. It was even more surreal that Nicky was the one cooking while Red sat there, sipping a glass of white wine. The former prison cook had wanted to help, but Nicky had insisted that she just relax and enjoy not cooking for once.

She had earned it.

"Well, there is Chapman and Issy, and that's basically it," explained Nicky. She had been going to invite more people but decided against it. She wanted this to be a smaller party just with her family.

There was one person missing though, and she had no idea where the hell she was. Nicky hadn't heard from Alex since she had left almost a month ago. She knew that Alex could handle herself, but it still didn't make her miss her any less. Especially when it was the holidays. She hoped wherever Alex was tonight, she was in good company.

Red just nodded her head in understanding as she took another sip from her wine glass. The older woman already knew about Alex's leaving. She had asked Nicky why, but she hadn't given her the full details. Lorna still didn't know the full story of why Alex had left. Nicky was still keeping her secret, and so was Piper for that matter.

xxx

"Blondie," whispered Red as she locked eyes with Piper.

"Red," replied back Piper with a smile.

The two women just stared at each other for a moment before embracing. Tears filled both of their eyes at seeing each other for the first time in years. Neither spoke a word, and they didn't have to as they hugged one another.

"Welcome home," whispered Piper into the Russian woman's ear before pulling away.

Red brought her hands up to the sides of Piper's face and held them there for a second as she looked deeply into her eyes. When she had first met the blonde, Piper had been nothing more than a naive yuppy girl. But here standing before her was a changed woman. Red could sense, and had seen for a fact, that Piper had grown so much since that first meeting in the cafeteria. Red's hazel eyes shined with unshed tears as she smiled proudly at what she saw reflected back at her. Piper was a strong woman now.

"You look good!" she stated before dropping her hands and taking a small step back from Piper.

Piper smiled shyly at Red as she brushed the tears away from her own eyes. She hadn't expected to get so emotional over seeing Red. But in a way, it was like being reunited with her mother. Red had been like a maternal figure to all of them in some way or another at Litchfield.

"And who is dis?" asked Red as she looked past Piper to the little girl standing in the doorway of the kitchen, behind her mother. Red, of course, knew all about Issy. She had been sent picture after picture of the little girl from when she was just a baby to her first school picture from just a couple of months ago. Her bunk walls had been plastered with the little girl's face mixed in with her own grandchildren's pictures.

However, this was the first time she was seeing the little girl in the flesh.

Piper grinned with pride as she turned to look at her daughter. "This is Issy," she stated as she placed a hand on Issy's shoulder and urged her into the room. Issy was suddenly very shy, which was uncommon for her.

Issy clung slightly to Piper's leg as she peered up at Red.

"Issy, this is Red," stated Piper as she introduced her daughter to Red. "Can you say hi?"

"Hi," whispered Issy shyly up at Red.

"Hi," whispered back Red, smiling down at the little girl.

xxx

It didn't take long for Issy to get over her shyness around Red.

She was soon talking up a storm around the Russian woman and asking her all sorts of questions.

"Why is your name Red?" asked Issy as she sat on Red's lap and looked up at her. "Is that your favourite colour?"

Red couldn't help but let out a booming laugh at this. Nicky had been right when she said that Issy was exactly like Piper. The little girl never seemed to shut up or stop asking questions. Just like Piper had been when she had first arrived at Litchfield. The former cook ran a hand through her signature spiked red hair and pondered the question for a moment. She had never given much thought on what her favourite colour was or why she was called Red.

"Sure," she answered with an easy smile.

Issy thought about this answer for a second before nodding her head slightly in approval. "Red is a pretty colour, but I like purple the best!" Issy declared with brightly.

Red's smile deepened at this. She was already falling in love with this little creature upon her lap like everyone else, it seemed.

The two were seated in the living room while Frosty The Snowman was playing on the TV. Lorna and Nicky were busy in the kitchen putting the final touches on dinner, and Piper was seated across from Red and her daughter. Piper loved to see their interactions together.

It made her happy for once.

She was trying not to think too much about how Alex wasn't here with them. She knew that Red and Alex had developed a close relationship together during those last years at Litchfield together. She had tried not to allow herself to be too sad over the past few weeks, but it was hard to ignore the pain in her heart sometimes. She knew that Alex had left because the brunette hadn't wanted to be a burden on Nicky, having to make her choose between herself and Alex. It still bothered her to think of what Alex had done to Pennsatucky for her, but at the same time, Piper now understood. She knew if the tables had been reversed somehow that she might have been tempted to do the same.

Love made you do crazy things sometimes.

Piper hadn't read the letter yet though. She had tucked it away with all the other letters that Alex had sent her. She had tried many times to open it but she could never go through with it.

She still wasn't ready to say goodbye to Alex.

xxx

It was a little later on in the evening as Piper wrapped her coat around her shoulders and slipped out of the house and onto the back porch. Everyone had just finished opening presents inside, and Piper had felt the need to be alone for a moment.

Ever since that first Christmas at Litchfield, Piper always found the holidays to be a hard time for her. It didn't seem to matter how much had changed since that day or how many years had passed. Come Christmas Eve, she was always brought back in some way to that day at Litchfield when changed everything for her.

Piper felt tears stinging her eyes, but she blinked them away as she watched the snow begin to fall heavily around her. It looked like it was going to be a white Christmas after all, and she couldn't help but smile.

Piper had always loved the snow.

A memory slowly filled her mind, but it wasn't one that usually haunted her on this day. It was a different kind of memory tonight.

A happy one...

_Piper, who had stopped twirling, was now sticking out her tongue at the sky and catching snowflakes again. _

_"Kid, what are you doing?" asked Alex in amusement._

_"Catching snowflakes," Piper murmured back as she continued to look up into the sky above her. _

_They stayed there for another five minutes before Alex couldn't take it any longer. She was bone-cold now and wanted to get back inside. "Pipes, come on!" she cried, trying to get the blonde's attention. _

_She held out her hand towards Piper. _

_Piper just shook her head at Alex. "No!" she cried back, a grin once again appearing on her face. She had no desire to go back inside. She was having too much fun in the snow at the moment. _

_"Come, join me!" Piper cried out to the older woman. _

_Alex just cocked an eyebrow at this. Was Piper being serious? _

_"Come on!" the blonde cried out again, "Catch snowflakes with me!" _

_Alex just smirked in bemusement at Piper before shaking her head. "It's too fucking cold for me!" she cried back. Alex then turned and began to walk away, back towards the door. She would leave Piper to her fun. _

_However, the sudden chill of snow hitting the back of her head stopped her dead in her tracks. _

_"Are you fucking kidding me?" asked Alex as she swung her head back around and glared at Piper. She tried to be pissed off but found the corners of her mouth uncontrollably turning up into a smile as Piper grinned deviously back at her. _

_"PUSSY!" cried out Piper towards Alex before sticking out her tongue at the brunette. Piper posed obnoxiously with her hands on her hips, waiting for Alex to do something. _

_Alex cocked an eyebrow and narrowed her eyes in response. She didn't like being called a pussy. "Oh, you want to fucking play like that, Chapman, huh?" Alex then bent down and ignored the protest of her skin to the snow burning in her hands as she made a snowball. "I'll show you who's a pussy!" she replied back as she suddenly stood up and threw the snow at Piper. _

_Piper just let out a squeal as she ducked and allowed the snowball to go flying past her head. _

_"Come here, you!" cried out Alex as she quickly closed the space between her and Piper. _

_Piper let out another squeal as she felt Alex's arms wrap around her and grinned like a mad woman as she locked eyes with Alex. _

_"You little fuck!" whispered Alex, smirking at Piper. She held Piper close in her arms before capturing her lips in a sloppy kiss. _

_"You love me, and you know it!" whispered back Piper in between kisses, her blue eyes pouring into Alex's green ones. _

_Alex just stared at Piper for a second longer, before pressing a hard kiss to Piper's mouth. _

_"You're right, I do fucking love you, Piper Chapman!" _

"Hey, you alright?" asked Lorna with concern as she came to join Piper out on the porch.

Piper suddenly snapped back to reality at this and looked over at Lorna. She nodded her head slightly. "I'm okay," she replied, and it was partly true. Despite the slight ache of her heart and the fog that was her mind at the moment, she was okay, or was going to be at least. Despite the pain that usually came to her on this day, it was still the holidays, and Piper still loved it. Especially with having a young child now. The holidays were once again filled with magic and hope. Like they should be.

Lorna continued to study Piper for a moment before smiling. "Well, don't stay too long out here. It's fucking freezing."

"Okay," whispered Piper towards Lorna before she watched the shorter brunette return to the house, leaving her once again to her thoughts.

Piper wrapped her coat further around herself as she turned her attention back onto the snow drifting down and falling around her. She just wanted a couple more moments alone before going back inside with the others.

xxx

Red was just getting ready to leave the house and head back towards her own home when the phone went off in the kitchen.

"Merry Christmas, Mommy," whispered Nicky to Red as she hugged her goodbye.

"Merry Christmas, Nicky," Red whispered back. The older woman planted a kiss on the side of Nicky's face before pulling away from the hug.

The phone continued to ring in the background, but Nicky ignored it. Whoever was calling could wait, thought Nicky as she smiled at Red for a moment longer. She watched as the Russian descended the stairs and got into the waiting cab. She waved goodbye before shutting the door and letting out a shiver.

It was still snowing outside.

Nicky ran a hand through her mane of hair as she walked back towards the kitchen, where the phone had stopped ringing. As she entered the kitchen, she locked eyes with Lorna who had the phone pressed up against her ear. She smiled at Nicky before lowering the phone and holding it out for her to take.

"It's for you," whispered Lorna.

Nicky frowned slightly as she took the phone. She had no idea who would be calling her this late at night. She figured it was her birth mother who was off on one of her trips again with her younger boyfriend, Lorenzo.

"Hello?" she said as she pressed the phone to her ear.

"Hey," spoke a raspy voice.

"Vause..." said Nicky slowly as she cradled the phone closer to her face and smiled at hearing her friend's familiar voice.

"I just wanted to wish you guys a Merry Christmas," explained Alex on the other line.

"Merry Christmas to you, too," Nicky replied back. Her brown eyes locked with Lorna's. The couple smiled at each other before they moved to stand beside one another. Nicky wrapped her arm around Lorna's waist and held her close to her side as she continued to talk to Alex.

"So, where the hell are you?" she asked.

"I'm in Buffalo. I'm staying with my cousin, Ben," explained Alex. "I'm sorry for leaving the way I did. It's just that..."

"Vause, it's okay. I get it why you left," spoke Nicky, cutting Alex off. She didn't need her to explain it. She had a pretty good idea why she had left.

A moment of silence passed between them. Nicky, even though she couldn't see Alex, could still sense that she wanted to ask about Piper.

"She's okay," she whispered.

Nicky heard Alex let out a sigh in response to this.

Another moment of silence fell between them before Nicky was telling Alex about Red and what she had missed tonight. She tried not to mention Piper or Issy too much, not wanting Alex to feel any worse than she already did. "I'm glad you called though because there is something I did want to ask you," Nicky began to explain slowly as she glanced over at Lorna and smiled.

"What's that?" asked Alex.

"I wanted to know if you would be my best man, or I guess I should say best woman," Nicky couldn't help but laugh at this.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" replied Alex in disbelief. "You and Morello are fucking getting married!?"

"Hell, yeah we are!" cried Nicky as she tightened her grip on Lorna, pulling her even closer to her. She and Lorna had always had an agreement to get married after Red came home, but Nicky had wanted to make it official and proposed to Lorna in Central Park a couple of days ago. They had only announced their engagement to Piper and Red earlier that night.

"Well, count me in," stated Alex. She wanted to be there to see the big day. She had watched the two of them fall out of love and then back into it. They deserved this.

Nicky grinned into the phone at this. The two friends continued to talk for a few moments longer before hanging up. But before they did, Alex gave Nicky the number she could be reached at.

xxx

Snowflakes fell like fat, little pieces of white confetti. It was wet snow, the kind of snow one dreamt of as a kid. Not that fluffy cotton ball crap, but wet, heavy, packing snow.

The good kind.

It came down in pelts, painting everything in pure whiteness.

Piper couldn't help but grin as she stepped off the sidewalk and into the middle of the street. She abandoned her bags and her purse on the ground as she spread her arms out on either side of her and began to twirl. She and Issy were on their way back home when Piper couldn't help herself. She had felt the deep need to be carefree and let everything go for once.

Issy couldn't help but laugh at how silly her mom was being at the moment as she watched from the sidewalk.

Piper had her head tilted back and tongue sticking out as she tried to catch snowflakes.

Issy continued to watch for a moment before going to go join her mom.

Piper smiled at her daughter as she stopped twirling suddenly and took both of Issy's hands into her own. She then began to spin the little girl around in a circle.

Issy's laughter rang out in the cold night air at this. Her brown eyes shined with joy as she continued to fly through the air.

Just like Piper, Issy loved the snow.

* * *

><p>I feel like I should say Merry Christmas here but it's so not Christmas, lol.<p>

Thanks for reading.

Next chapter will be the last one.

Don't forget to review!

Julie


	21. Chapter 20

Do not own Orange Is the New Black or any of characters.

Hey,

So we've sadly made it to the end, my friends. I just wanted to say a big big thank you to all of you that have read, reviewed, favourited and followed this story. And not only this one but Snowflakes too. The support has been overwhelming! You guys are awesome! :)

Now, it has been suggested to do a third part to this series. And I can honestly say, I don't think that will be happening. At least, not anytime soon. I just have too much going on at the moment and I honestly don't feel like writing a third part. But I always say shit like this and then end up doing it anyways. So who knows! Maybe there will be a future trilogy to it. But please, do not expect one anytime next week. lol.

Anyways, enough of my rambling, sit back and enjoy!

It's a long, juicy one!

- Oh and thank you so, so much fig-aruna! You are a champ! And this chapter wouldn't havve been half as good as it is now without your amazing help and input. Not only this chapter but the good other half of the story you contributed too! :)

Enjoy! Enjoy!

* * *

><p><span><strong>Rainstorms<strong>

_**Chapter 20**_

_Hey_

_April 2022_

Piper found herself seated on the edge of the bed holding an unopened letter. She pursed her lips slightly as she looked down at her name written on the front of it. There had been so many times over the past five months that she had found herself in the exact position she was in now, with the letter in her hands.

And each time was the same. She could never go through with it. One time she had broken the seal of the envelope to only stop half-way through, but that was the furthest she had ever gotten. She wasn't quite sure why she hadn't read the letter yet. At first, she hadn't wanted to because she was afraid to say goodbye to Alex.

But now she knew that Alex was coming back. Today, to be exact.

It was Nicky and Lorna's wedding today, and she knew that Alex was Nicky's best woman. There would be no avoiding each other. They were both part of the wedding party. Piper was both excited and extremely nervous to see Alex again.

Piper missed her, despite everything that had transpired between them. She still wasn't sure of what Alex had done exactly, but she couldn't help it – she wanted to move past it. To be with her. She truly did. But it seemed like her heart and head were saying two different things. It had taken her a while to get to the place she was at now.

Piper had been forced to face the demons from her past again these last couple of months.

There had been a mixture of good days and bad. There were times when she felt like she was struggling to breathe as the pain in her heart and the tension in her body became too much. She hated how old wounds had reopened after years of finally healing. She hated how it seemed like she would never get over all of it, that it would never leave her. She wished that Alex had never told her about what she had done and had continued to lie to her, so that she wouldn't have to think about it.

She had been happy with her life and with herself before Alex had come back into it, only to have it torn up again...

"Mommy?"

Piper looked up suddenly at this and towards Issy, who stood in the doorway of the room. "Baby!" cried out Piper as she immediately put on a bright face and placed the letter behind her on the bed. "Look at you! You look beautiful!"

The little girl was all done up in her flower girl dress for the wedding.

Issy smiled slightly at this but still continued to look on at her mother with concern. "You're crying again," she said as she took a small step further into the bedroom.

Piper brushed the tears away from her eyes and once again smiled at her daughter. She hated for Issy to see her like this. She never meant for Issy to see this part of herself. "It's nothing," she whispered. "Mommy is just..." Her voice trailed off, and she shook her head slightly, not knowing what to say anymore.

Issy didn't say anything as she walked over to her mother's side and crawled up beside her on the bed. It was then the little girl noticed the envelope behind Piper's back and immediately reached for it. "Why don't you ever open it?" Her brown eyes looked up to Piper in confusion.

Issy had seen Piper stare down at the letter multiple times now, but her mother never seemed to open it. Which she didn't understand? Mail was supposed to be read, she thought.

Piper just stared back at Issy, a new set of tears suddenly threatening to fall from her eyes.

"Alex wrote it," continued Issy. "She loves you, Mommy. Why don't you open it? Do you not love her? Is that why she left?"

Piper had to look away. Each time she heard Alex's name on Issy's tongue, it made her heart ache because it just reminded her that despite what Alex had done and how much it hurt her, Piper still loved her all the same. This wasn't the first time her daughter had brought up the topic of Alex. She didn't even know where the little girl had gotten her information from on the subject. The blonde never gave her a straight answer though. She would just dismiss it.

"Issy, we've been through this. Alex left for different reasons," Piper whispered as she found her words.

"But she's back today," stated Issy in hopes of putting a smile on her mother's face. "And you can tell her that you love her."

"Issy, please," whispered Piper as she suddenly stood up. "Mommy doesn't want to talk about this...ok? Alex is coming back for Auntie Nicky's and Lorna's wedding, that's it. It's not about Mommy or Alex or Issy today. It's about Nicky and Lorna." Piper took the letter from Issy's hands and placed it on the dresser.

Issy just continued to look at Piper with questioning eyes. It was clear that she didn't understand.

I'm not sure I understand it either, Piper thought as her eyes lingered on the envelope.

xxx

The air hung heavily with the scent of rain and dirt. It was that earthy smell that could only mean one thing.

Spring had sprung.

It was about fucking time, thought Alex to herself as she stepped out of the cab and slowly took in her surroundings. It had been a long winter to say the least. She was happy to see that the snow had finally melted away, and the air was somewhat warm again.

She could really use a cigarette, she thought but quickly dismissed the need from her mind. She was trying to quit. So instead, she reached into the bag she was carrying for a piece of gum and quickly put it into her mouth. She chewed on the stick vigorously, filling her mouth with the taste of spearmint, then slipped her hands into the pockets of her leather jacket and began to walk slowly down the sidewalk to the church.

Alex stumbled every few steps in the four-inch heels she was wearing. She wasn't accustomed to wearing heels anymore, only used to wearing either boots or the white sneakers that were required at her work. Alex hardly went out at night nowadays, so she never really had opportunities to wear heels.

Except for today. Today was a very special day.

It was Nicky and Lorna's wedding.

Alex stopped suddenly and looked up at the cathedral before her. She was a little surprised when she heard that Nicky and Lorna were getting married in a church. But Lorna was Catholic, she knew, so it wasn't that big of a surprise, she guessed. She looked over her shoulder briefly before beginning to walk up the stairs that led to the large wooden doors of the cathedral.

"Vause!" Nicky cried out as she spotted Alex entering the church.

"Hey," Alex greeted back with a smile as she locked eyes with Nicky before beginning to make her way towards her. Nicky was standing at the front of the church, which was currently empty except for the two of them.

The wedding wasn't to start for another couple of hours, but Alex had been told to come early.

She was the best woman.

"It's good to fucking see ya," whispered Nicky as she reached out towards Alex and hugged her. The two friends had spoken on the phone nearly every week since Christmas, but this was the first time they were seeing each other face-to-face since Alex had left months back.

"It's good to see ya too," replied Alex as she hugged the shorter woman back. And it was. She was happy to be back in the City. The last couple of months in Buffalo hadn't been bad, and the time spent away had actually been much needed, but she felt like she finally was back where she belonged. She wasn't sure what the next twenty-four hours would entail for her – she found it hard to even think about – but she hoped that something good would come out of it.

"I see you got the dress," said Nicky as she pulled away and smirked at the bright magenta dress that Alex was wearing. Nicky had given Lorna full control over planning the wedding, which had meant that everything was either a shade of pink or yellow, Lorna's two favourite colours.

Alex couldn't help but smirk as she too looked down at the dress she was wearing. It wasn't her style one bit, and she had frowned a little when it had arrived in the mail a week ago, but whatever made the bride happy. She was just glad to be a part of today.

The dress was made out of chiffon and was a darker shade of magenta, a one-shoulder design that fell to just above Alex's knees.

"It doesn't look bad on you," Nicky commented slyly. "Lorna was a little worried that your tits would make the one-shoulder strap look awkward."

Alex knew that Nicky was teasing her as she took off her leather jacket and adjusted the strap of the dress, which was supposed to represent three roses.

"Thanks...but fucking look at you! Never in a million years did I think I'd see Nicky Nichols in a fucking wedding dress!" Alex's eyes took in the sight of Nicky.

Nicky had her usual wild hair tamed and pinned to one side with a yellow rose, allowing it to fall down the side of her neck in soft curls. The dress she wore was made out of lace and was the colour of champagne. It was cut in a mermaid style and hugged Nicky's hips before flaring out to the floor. It was short-sleeved, had a high neckline, and was vintage-looking from the front but was sexy from behind, as it was backless.

"You look beautiful, Nicky!" And she meant it.

Nicky just grinned at this. "Oh, don't make me blush, Vause!"

"Shut up!" Alex cried back as she rolled her eyes and punched Nicky lightly in the arm. It seemed that the two of them could never have a real serious moment together.

The two women continued to stand there, smiling for a moment before Nicky told Alex to follow her to the back of the church, where she could put her stuff and finally see Red.

xxx

Piper was just finishing up her make-up in the mirror when Lorna came in.

"Look at you," cooed the blonde as she turned to look at Lorna in her dress. She had seen the dress before on her, but it didn't matter because it was like she was seeing it for the first time all over again. "You're gorgeous."

And she was, thought Piper.

Lorna had her hair pinned up and off of her face in an up-do of sorts, and there was a long veil pinned just underneath it and a pink rose tucked behind her ear. The mermaid-cut dress was white and off-the-shoulder with laced long-sleeves. Piper thought back to the first time she met Lorna, back in the Litchfield welcome van where the shorter brunette had shown her pictures of wedding dresses and told her what she wanted in her perfect wedding dress. And Lorna had found it, thought Piper as she continued to look at Lorna, who was smiling.

Her brown eyes where shining with tears. She was a very happy woman at the moment.

"You look like a princess!" cried out Issy as she looked up at Lorna and smiled excitedly.

"So do you!" Lorna replied back at the little girl. "You both look beautiful!"

Like Alex, Piper was wearing a one-shoulder strap dress in magenta chiffon, though hers was a lighter shade of pink than Alex's, and her hair was gathered in a low messy bun at the back of her neck.

Issy's long blonde hair was in a braided up-do, and there were little pink flowers tucked throughout it. Her dress was a light pink short-sleeved chiffon dress with a yellow sash tied at her waist.

Issy was the flower girl, and Piper was surprisingly the Maid of Honour. Lorna was originally going to have a larger wedding party but decided just to have the two most important people in her life stand beside her as she married the love of her life.

xxx

"Look at you," whispered Red as she took in the sight of Alex.

Alex couldn't help but smile back at Red at this.

This was the first time that the two of them were seeing each other in over a year. The last time had been at Alex's going away party, and it felt surreal seeing each other outside the walls of Litchfield, not adorned in the standard-issued khaki.

Red's hazel eyes were bright as she continued to take in the sight of the tall brunette. Alex had always been a beautiful girl, she thought. But seeing her dressed up like she was now, Red couldn't help but admire how much of a beautiful woman Alex was.

"Look at you," replied back Alex, gesturing to what Red was wearing. She had never seen the older woman in anything else but her white chef shirt and apron. It felt kind of weird for Alex to be seeing the Russian in a burgundy satin dress.

Red just let out a booming laugh at this.

The two women shared a long hug before breaking apart and turning to look at Nicky, who was smirking at them.

It was amazing how life worked out. Nine years ago, the three of them had met at Litchfield, all arriving there under different circumstances. Their relationships with each other had grown deeper than just the normal friendships that usually developed in prison. They were a family, a fact that was poignantly supported today as they were all here for Nicky and Lorna's wedding.

Red was once again with her girls.

xxx

Piper stared at herself in the mirror. She would see Alex today, she thought.

Nicky had told Piper about how the tall brunette had phoned her on Christmas Eve, just after Piper had left with Issy, and had explained how she had asked Alex to be a part of the wedding. Piper had known for a while that this day had been coming, but she still didn't know how to handle it exactly even though she had had a lot of time to think about what Alex had done and to figure out what everything meant.

It had been five months since Alex had left. Five, long _fucking_ months.

Piper had been scared knowing that what Alex had done affected her, and how it was affecting her.

Piper still struggled some days with her trauma.

She and Alex were so good together but so awful together, too. As soon as they seemed to have something, one of them screwed up. But throughout it all, Piper knew that she missed Alex. Not having her around the past five months had put it all in perspective for her, and there was something she could never deny.

She loved Alex.

She loved her.

Despite all that they had done and all that had happened between them, Alex had loved her. Alex was her rock after all the ugly stuff with Healy had happened and when Piper had been hurting herself. And after years at Litchfield, Alex forgave her for sleeping with Larry, and Piper could tell that she was growing a bond with Issy too. They had both been willing to put the past behind them for once and stop fighting their feelings for each other.

Then Alex had dropped that bomb, and the past once again become an issue. A big fucking issue.

But Piper knew without a doubt that Alex loved her and would do anything for her. And Piper loved her back. There were still doubts in Piper's mind, risks that she considered constantly. But, there would always be some sort of doubts, she thought. Alex wasn't perfect. She wasn't perfect.

Piper wasn't sure what the future held, but she knew one thing. She'd been hurting so much throughout the years, feeling that undeniable hole in her heart. Things would be a challenge with Alex, but things in life would always be challenging.

Piper wanted to try.

She needed to try.

Piper stared at herself in the mirror once again and lifted her hand to her heart, feeling the tension unwind a little within her. She was ready to see Alex again and to finally talk, about everything.

She owed Alex that much. And after hearing Issy state that Alex loved her and how Piper loved her back, she knew she owed herself that much. It was all Piper could think about.

And she hoped that Alex, after all this time, wanted the same thing too.

xxx

The wedding march had begun to play. Everyone seemed to be holding their breaths a little. Nicky had already walked down the aisle with Red, and Alex had followed behind them. The two of them now stood at the front of the church, waiting for the bride to appear.

Alex caught Nicky's eye and smiled as the door opened and the rest of the party started to enter.

Issy came down the aisle first, carrying a white basket in her hand as she slowly walked down the aisle and carefully sprinkled pink and yellow rose petals as she went. She smiled as she locked eyes with Nicky.

Issy's eyes then shifted onto Alex.

Alex couldn't help but give the little girl a small wave as she locked eyes with her. She never would have thought she would be so happy to see the little girl whose conception had ruined her so long ago. But she couldn't help but love her in a way, just like she couldn't help but love Piper.

Issy's smile widened at this. It was a good thing Issy was almost at the end of the aisle because before Alex knew it, the little girl was running towards her. Issy hugged Alex's legs and looked up at her.

Everyone in the church laughed and smiled at this.

Alex looked down at Issy and patted her head, smiling deeply. Alex had to admit she had missed this little spitfire. She continued to smile at her for a moment before she felt Nicky nudge her shoulder. Alex immediately looked up and glanced over at Nicky before looking down the aisle.

Piper was now slowly making her way towards them.

Alex could still feel Issy standing beside her, but all her attention was on the older blonde. She found herself holding her breath as butterflies all of a sudden fluttered in the pit of her stomach. She had dreamt about Piper for months now, but she was finally here in the flesh now, and it all seemed a little surreal. Leaving had been one of the most painful things Alex had ever done. But she wasn't sure what Piper thought of her. She knew that the blonde had gone through a rough time after she left, and she hated how it had been because of her. She absolutely hated it.

But Nicky had said that she had been doing better.

Alex wanted to talk to her. So much. But at the same time, she wasn't sure. She didn't know where she was in Piper's mind when she thought of her.

The last time they had talked, it had ended so badly. Piper could barely look at her. She had compared her to Healy. Alex wasn't the person that she thought she was.

How were they ever supposed to move on from that?

How was _she_ supposed to move on from that?

Alex was scared that Piper would reject her again. And a part of her didn't blame her if she did. She had done a terrible thing. A vile thing. Maybe it hadn't been to Piper, but she had hurt someone just as Piper had been hurt. Alex completely understood if Piper never wanted to see her again after this wedding.

How could she think of Piper forgiving her when she hadn't even forgiven herself yet?

The two ex-lovers locked eyes on each other briefly before Alex forced her eyes away. She could feel the tears coming on suddenly. A wave of guilt and shame washed over her that she couldn't shake. It seemed she would never get over this inner struggle to love herself again. She had kept it a secret for so long and had been able to keep all these feelings locked deep within herself. But after telling Piper and seeing that look of fear and disgust on her face, everything had come pouring out, and she couldn't get rid of them anymore.

She tried to compose herself as the music changed suddenly and Lorna began to walk towards them. She studied Lorna for a second before glancing over at Nicky. It made her heart ache to see that look of love on Nicky's face. She didn't want to feel jealous of what her friend had, but she couldn't help but feel a little.

She wanted that.

And despite herself, she glanced over at Piper, who was looking straight back at her.

xxx

"Okay. Now let's take a picture with just the wedding party," spoke the photographer as he gestured for Piper and Alex to come stand close together.

Alex blushed slightly as she caught Piper's eyes for a moment before looking away shyly.

Piper couldn't help but smirk slightly at this. The two had yet to talk or anything. After the church ceremony, they had been urged to take the traditional wedding photos, which were happening just outside the church.

"Hey," whispered Alex uncertainly.

"Hey," whispered back Piper with a smile.

The two held each other's eyes for a moment longer before being interrupted by the photographer.

"Okay, ladies," he called out.

Not another word was spoken between them as they stood shoulder-to-shoulder, holding bouquets of yellow flowers and smiled into the camera. Both were nervous to say the least. It had been so long since they had stood so closely to one another. Both wanted to talk, but this wasn't the time or place for that. So instead, small looks and touches were passed between the two women as photo after photo was taken.

"Okay, now how about we have the flower girl come join," called out the photographer as he looked up from the camera and gestured for Issy to come stand between the two women.

And so it went for the rest of the time.

xxx

"Have you talked to her yet?" asked Nicky as she came to stand beside Alex, who was nursing a bottle of beer in her hand.

Alex glanced over at Nicky and shook her head. "Fuck no."

Every time they were alone, they had been interrupted in some fashion. After the photos had been taken, everyone had piled into a limo together and headed towards the reception, which was held in a banquet hall in the heart of the City. Alex had tried to talk to Piper then, but it had been too loud, and they had an audience of sorts with Red and Issy in the limo with them. The most the two of them had talked about was how beautiful Lorna and Nicky looked in their dresses.

It was a little later, and the reception had been going on for three hours now. Everyone had just finished eating, and the speeches were already done. A quiet began to settle in Alex's mind, knowing that the first dance was supposed to be starting soon.

"Well, she's alone now," Nicky pointed out as she took a drag from her own beer and gestured across the room to where Piper stood. The blonde was checking something on her phone.

Alex frowned slightly at this. She was tempted, but she was nervous. She didn't want to be rejected again. Nicky had told her that Piper was better now, but she still was scared not knowing how Piper would treat her or how Piper even was. They had acted civil towards each other so far, but they had been surrounded by others all day. Who knows what would happen when they were alone? As much as Alex wanted to talk to Piper, she was afraid to do so all the same.

Alex took a long sip from her bottle as she looked across the room at Piper. She really just wanted to talk to her and tell her that she loved her. Especially after watching Lorna and Nicky tie the knot. It made her desire to be with Piper even stronger. She wanted to spend the rest of her life with her. Piper was what made her truly happy, she thought, which was something she hadn't been in awhile. She was tired of being sad all the time. She wanted to be loved and to have someone to love. And she knew that person was Piper. But again, she wasn't sure what the blonde thought of her. Piper might not want to be with her. She seemed pretty happy already with her life. She had a successful business and a family now.

Why would she want Alex to come in and disrupt all that?

"Well, one of you is going to have to be the first one," commented Nicky as she once again glanced over at Alex.

"I know," whispered Alex as she continued to study Piper, who was now staring straight back at her. Her heart skipped a beat, and she swallowed as she looked into those baby blues.

"Go get her," whispered Nicky with a smirk as she nudged Alex's back.

Alex tore her eyes away from Piper for a moment to glare at Nicky.

Nicky just smirked even more widely at Alex at this.

Alex then looked back at Piper, who was still staring back at her. It looked like the blonde wanted her to make a move too. A sigh then escaped from her lips as she drained the remainder of her beer before placing the empty bottle down onto the bar behind her.

Music played softly in the background as she walked across the dance floor and towards where Piper stood at one of the tables. Alex could feel Nicky's eyes burning into her back, but she ignored it. It surprised her how much Nicky was invested in Piper and her getting back together, especially when this was her big day.

She couldn't help but smile at Piper as she came closer.

"Hey."

"Hey," whispered back Piper.

"What's up?" asked Alex awkwardly as she came to stand beside Piper.

Piper couldn't help but smirk slightly at this. "What's up?" she repeated, cocking an eyebrow at Alex.

"What?" replied Alex with a shrug of her shoulders. She was trying to be pissed because she knew she was being mocked, but the corners of her lips uncontrollably turned upwards into a smile. She was nervous as hell.

"It's okay," spoke Piper. She could tell that Alex was nervous. She was too.

They continued to stand there looking at each other for a moment before Alex took a step closer to her. "Do you want to go somewhere and talk?" Her green eyes pierced deeply into Piper's, studying her.

Piper nodded her head slowly in reply. She would like that very much, she thought.

But before they could go anywhere, they were interrupted again, this time by the DJ.

It was time for the first dance.

Piper and Alex just continued to look at each other for a moment before shifting their attention to the dance floor where Nicky and Lorna had just appeared in the centre of it. The room then seemed to come to a standstill as all eyes were on the couple as they shared their first dance with Savage Garden's Truly Madly Deeply playing in the background.

Alex moved a little closer to Piper so that their shoulders were touching as they watched their friends slow-dance. They both looked so happy, she thought. It was incredible how far the two of them had come. She couldn't help but hope for the same thing with her and Piper.

She wanted her happy ending too.

The song soon came to an end.

"I've never seen two people more in love," whispered Piper suddenly into Alex's ear. Her breath was warm against Alex's skin, sending a wave of goosebumps down her spine.

Alex immediately turned her attention back to Piper at this. Her green eyes were dark with devotion as she continued to study the blonde for a second.

Piper stared back at Alex, feeling a mix of emotions at the moment. This person had done something she wasn't sure she could forgive. She wanted Alex but was struggling to fight the impulse to run. But this was also the person who had always had her heart. Who had nursed her through one of the worse times in her life.

"Do you want to dance?" Piper asked suddenly.

Alex's green eyes widened in surprise but soon found herself nodding her head in agreement.

Piper smiled at this and suddenly reached out to take Alex's hand. They stood there for a second, looking down at their interlocked fingers. Alex opened her mouth to say something, but before she could, the blonde was leading her out onto the dance floor. Al Green's Simply Beautiful was now playing as the two of them stood looking awkwardly at each other like teenagers at a middle school dance. Neither seemed to know what to do next or where to put their hands exactly. Alex felt doubts beginning to swim within her. She was afraid to touch Piper. The last time she had tried, the blonde had flipped. She didn't want to trigger anything in Piper again.

"Pipes," whispered Alex. "We don't have to..."

Piper shook her head at this. She smiled at Alex as she wrapped her arms around her neck. She was letting Alex know that this was okay. That she wanted this.

Alex just stood there, studying Piper for a moment longer before slowly resting her hands on the blonde's waist. She was barely holding her as their hips began to move to the music.

It had been a while since they had slow-danced like this. Their hearts were both racing as nerves and excitement flittered through them. About halfway through the song, Alex pulled Piper closer to her. Their hips were now pressing against each other as they continued to sway back and forth to the music. They both could feel their breaths on each other's faces, they were so close.

"I'm sorry," whispered Alex suddenly. She needed to get that off of her chest.

Piper shook her head slightly from side to side at this. A small smile appeared on her face as she continued to look deeply into Alex's eyes.

Alex's eyebrows fused together in confusion at this.

"It's okay," whispered back Piper as she tightened her hold around Alex's neck, making her face inch even closer than it already was. She once again smiled at Alex before slowly capturing her lips into a kiss. And it was okay, thought Piper to herself. She loved Alex and was trying to forgive her. She didn't really know how, and maybe that was okay. They didn't have to figure out everything at the very moment.

Tonight was about love. She had just watched Nicky and Lorna tie the knot, and it had moved her. Piper had been married herself once before, but it hadn't been nearly as emotion-filled as Nicky and Lorna's wedding had been. Today had been beautiful to say the least. And Piper wanted what they had, she yearned for it. She had a pretty good life already, she thought, but like always, Piper was selfish and wanted more.

She wanted her crazy love story. And she had it, right in front of her now, with Alex.

Alex felt herself forget how to breathe as she felt the soft wetness of Piper's tongue slip in between her lips. She was taken back by Piper's eagerness, to say the least, and stood there in a daze for a second as Piper's touch travelled through her, and before she knew it, she was kissing Piper back too.

They stopped dancing at that moment, and the entire world seemed to go still as all their energy and concentration was thrown into this one kiss.

xxx

It had just finished raining as Alex led Piper outside the venue, the blonde's hand carefully nestled within her own. The two women stood underneath a canopy of sorts that stretched along the entrance of the building. It was the only place that Alex could think of where they would be able to talk in private.

The air was cold and damp as they stood there looking at each other for a second.

Alex was desperately craving a cigarette at the moment but tried to ignore the feeling as she looked past Piper for a moment. She knew Piper had said it was okay, but there was still so much she wanted to tell her. So much that she needed to hear come out of Piper's mouth.

"Alex," Piper began to speak. She could tell there was something that Alex wanted to tell her, but she honestly didn't want to hear it. She didn't need to hear it, at least not at the moment. Piper just wanted to be with Alex for at least tonight and forget about everything else for once. She was tired of living in the past and thinking. She wanted to feel and be loved.

Alex slowly turned her eyes back onto Piper at this.

Piper smiled back at her as she reached out and took her hand, squeezing it. "Alex," she stated again. Her voice was soft and gentle like it was whenever she talked to Issy.

"It's okay," she continued. "You don't have to explain."

Alex just looked at Piper for a moment before suddenly being overcome with anger. No, it wasn't okay, she thought. She didn't want Piper to forgive her so easily like she was now. She didn't deserve it. What she had done was unforgivable, she thought.

"No, it's not fucking okay!" Alex whispered harshly as she suddenly pulled her hand away from Piper's, taking a few halting steps away from the blonde and felt angry tears begin to form in her eyes.

Piper was taken aback by this. Her blue eyes bore into Alex, whose back was turned to her now. She could sense that Alex was still deeply upset by what she had done all those years ago now. And she was too. But there came a point when you had to try putting it behind and move forward, as hard as it might be. And that's what Piper was trying to do now. She knew she wanted to move forward from all this.

Piper slowly then enclosed the space between her and Alex.

"Hey," she whispered gently as she placed a hand on Alex's shoulder.

Alex flinched slightly at Piper's touch, but she didn't shrug her off.

They stood like this for a moment longer. Piper didn't want to force Alex to look at her, but it was killing her all the same as the brunette continued to look away from her.

"Alex," whispered Piper again.

"I hate what I did," whispered Alex bitterly. Her voice was thick with tears and hatred at herself.

"I know you do," Piper began to rub Alex's arm. She was talking to her like she would to Issy when she was upset.

"I'm a monster," whispered Alex painfully as she turned suddenly and looked at Piper. She didn't mean to get this emotional, but after hearing Piper say it was okay and her being nice to her, she couldn't get over why. She didn't deserve Piper being nice to her. "Why don't you hate me? You were right. I'm not the person you thought I was."

Piper hated the look that was on Alex's face at the moment. There were unshed tears glistening in her green eyes. The last time Piper could remember seeing Alex so hurt like this was when she told her that her mom had died.

Piper squeezed her arm suddenly.

"You aren't a monster," stated Piper firmly. And it was the truth. Yes, what Alex had done was terrible and was something she would never wish on anyone. But she knew Alex. She wasn't a monster.

Not like Healy.

Alex just stared at Piper in confusion at this.

"Yes, what you did was terrible, but, Alex... I have thought a lot about it over the past few months," Piper said slowly as she reached out and took both of Alex's hands into her own. "And yes, I hated you, and I'm still trying to figure out how to forgive you. But you aren't a monster, Alex. You acted out of pain and anger and made a bad decision. You made a stupid, fucking bad mistake but a mistake nonetheless."

Alex pursed her lips at this, still unsure of what to do.

"I love you," whispered Piper as she brought a hand up to the side of Alex's face and caressed her skin. "And I want to try."

Alex once again didn't say anything at this. A stray tear ran down her face and onto Piper's hand. She wanted to try too. But a part of her was terrified.

Piper brushed the tear away from Alex's cheek before leaning forward and kissing her softly on the lips.

"I'm all in."

Alex looked deeply back at the blonde at this. She still didn't deserve Piper being so nice to her, she thought. She didn't deserve anyone being nice to her. She struggled between giving into the strong feelings coursing through her body at the moment and pulling away from the blonde.

Piper sensed that.

"I love you," whispered Piper again, more fiercely. She was tired of fighting with her feelings. She wanted to be with Alex again, and she needed the brunette to see this. She wanted to try to put the past behind them and start fresh.

The tears began to fall rapidly down Alex's face at this. She couldn't keep them in any longer just as she couldn't keep from fighting herself. Hearing that Piper loved her, despite all that she had done, just brought her over the edge. She once again tried to pull away from Piper, but the blonde wouldn't let her.

The blonde gathered Alex into her arms and held her tightly. She didn't say a word as she stroked the brunette's hair and rocked her slightly back and forth like a child.

Alex sobbed even harder at this. Here was this beautiful woman who had been through hell comforting her like a mother would a child. She didn't deserve this, she thought. She once again tried to pull away from Piper, but again the blonde was stronger than she looked and tightened her grip on Alex.

"Stop fighting," she whispered tenderly into her ear. "I'm here for you. I'm not leaving this time. You helped me, and now I'm going to help you..."

Piper then cupped the sides of Alex's face and forced her to look at her. "I love you, as much as you don't want to hear it. I fucking love you, and I'm not leaving..." She dropped her hands and once again pulled Alex to her. She wanted Alex to feel that she was loved, just like Alex had back at Litchfield.

"I love you too," Alex's voice came out hoarse and raspier than it usually was. Her make-up was ruined as tears continued to stream down her face, and she looked up at Piper. She rested her forehead slightly against hers as she tried to compose herself again. She hadn't meant to break down like she had.

They stayed like this for a moment before Piper slowly pressed her mouth against Alex's.

xxx

The two women walked back into the banquet hall hand-in-hand, a gesture that didn't go unnoticed by a certain little girl.

Issy came racing up to both of them. There was the biggest smile on her face as she looked between Alex and Piper. "You're together!" she stated.

Neither Alex or Piper could help but smile at this. They looked down at Issy before looking at their interlocked fingers. There was no point in denying it. Piper caught Alex's eyes for a second before looking back at her daughter.

"See, Mommy! I told you! Alex _loves _you! And you _love_ her!"

Alex couldn't help but laugh slightly at this. This kid was something else, she thought.

"Yes, yes," replied Piper. "You were right!"

Alex couldn't help but laugh again. She loved how Piper had just gotten schooled in a way by a four-year-old.

"Oh, shut up," mumbled Piper as she looked at Alex and shook her head slightly. She could practically see what Alex was thinking at the moment as she continued to smirk at her with that look in her eyes.

The blonde tried to feel mad but was utterly failing as she continued to look at Alex, and a smirk began to form on her face too.

xxx

Piper watched from afar as Alex danced with Issy.

The little girl was barely awake as Alex held her hands and danced with her. Issy had her feet on top of Alex's as her whole body slumped into her.

Piper couldn't help but smile at the sight of the two of them. She knew that it wouldn't be much longer before Issy was fast asleep. Nicky and Lorna had already departed for the night on their honeymoon to Bora Bora.

The party was soon coming to an end.

Piper continued to watch for a second longer before making her way towards where Alex and Issy were at the edge of the dance floor. They were practically the only people left dancing.

"Hey, can I cut in?" asked Piper as she tapped on Alex's shoulder.

Alex immediately turned her head and smiled at Piper. She couldn't believe how happy she was at the moment. It was amazing how things had changed for the good between her and Piper. They both had decided to give it a go, yet again, but this time there were finally no secrets or anything between them. They were starting with a fresh slate.

"Of course," whispered Alex to the blonde.

Not a word was exchanged as Piper suddenly lifted Issy up and against her hip. The little girl immediately wrapped her arms and legs around Piper and rested her head against her shoulder.

Piper kissed the child's forehead before looking over at Alex, who then wrapped her arms around both of them as best as she could.

Their eyes never left the other's as they then began to dance, making a circle of pink on the dance floor.

xxx

It was the early hours of the morning as Piper found herself in a common place for her nowadays.

The tub.

She had tried going to sleep, but her body and mind were too wired from the events from earlier that night, so she had run herself a bath and brought the letter with her. She hadn't told Alex that she hadn't read the letter yet.

But after everything that had happened between them, she thought it might finally be a good time to do so.

She bit down her on lower lip as she sank slightly lower into the soapy warm water and held the paper in front of her, being careful not to get it wet. Her heart was racing in anticipation to finally read what was written there.

_Piper,_

_You know I'm not good at these things...writing. But you deserve at least some sort of attempt from me. _

_I don't know if you will even fucking read this. You will probably just burn this, and I don't blame you. I would too. _

_I know that you hate me, and I hate myself too. I never meant to do what I did to Pennsatucky. I was just so angry and fucking pissed off over what had happened to you, what Healy and Pennsatucky did to you. Just thinking back on it now still makes me what to scream and punch someone. _

_I know you don't need to be reminded of what they did to you. You surely remember. But...you were just so fucked up and hurting... I had never seen you like that...so broken. It scared me, so much. I hated how you were struggling, even with just walking around Litchfield. _

_I still remember how you looked in the cafeteria that day after you got out of SHU. You weren't yourself, which wasn't surprising. But you looked so lost, and I just wanted to help you. But every time I did, you would run away and freak out. And I know that was partly my fault too. You thought that I hated you for picking Larry. And I did for some time. But seeing you for the first time after six months of worrying, all of that just went out the window. _

_I never stopped loving you, kid. _

_And that's why I did what I did. I know you don't want to hear this, or read it. But I have to explain it. After you told me what Healy did to you, all I could think about was getting revenge. And I wanted to protect you. You weren't strong enough to do it yourself, and I just thought if I got rid of him, that it would help you in some way. I don't know how...I just did. I didn't know how else to help you. I could see the battle you were going through. You were scared and harming yourself. Seeing those marks on your body made me see red. _

_I had a dream where I killed Healy. It was right after you told me what he had done. It had been so vivid. So real. For a moment, I thought it had been true. I kinda wish it had been._

_I will always fucking hate that fat bastard..._

_He ruined you. He took advantage of you, twice. I wanted to see him dead for hurting you... But I never got my chance, as you know. _

_And then when you told me about Pennsatucky, all that anger once again returned, maybe even a little worse because I felt like I had a second chance in a way to get revenge. I know this is crazy, and none of it is an excuse... And I hate bringing up the past for you...I really fucking do... but I have to explain it... _

_You didn't see how that fucking hick walked around Litchfield like she owned the place while you were locked up in SHU. The way she talked about you. She was fucked up, that one, like you know. I hated her since day one. And after finding out she had something to do with you getting assaulted, that was the final straw for me. Someone had to teach her a lesson. _

_And I thought that person was me. _

_I just meant for it to be a threat... I just wanted to scare Pennsatucky. I wanted her to back off of you and just leave you the fuck alone. But my emotions got the best of me in that laundry room. _

_I'm not proud of what I did. _

_I hated myself after what I had done. But I bottled it up all inside and kept it to myself. I told myself after it had happened that I would never, could never tell you. And I had, up until now. _

_You are probably wondering why I suddenly decided to confess to you what I did after so many years and especially after things had been going well for us. I just wanted to start off on honest grounds, I guess... I wanted this time to work out for us. You had been honest with me about Larry, and I wanted to be honest with you. _

_I don't expect you to forgive me after reading this letter. I don't even fucking forgive myself. _

_Every day, I wake up thinking about what I did. And I wonder if things would be different now, if I had never done it. I don't know if Pennsatucky would have continued to bother you or not. I don't know if you would have stopped hurting or not. Yes, after what I did, Pennsatucky had shut up for once and she stopped bothering you, allowing you to heal, at least a little. _

_But now thinking back on it, I don't really know if it made much of a difference? You still continued to harm yourself. You were still haunted by what Healy had done to you. You still woke up screaming at night. It took you so long to trust others, especially me. _

_Again, I don't know if this letter will make a difference to you. You probably hate me more after reading all this. I have just basically written that I raped Pennsatucky for no fucking reason. And all of this is fucking worse because you didn't get better overnight like I had hoped. You still suffered. Even years after, you are still suffering. _

_And I know that's why you slept with Larry. You saw Healy. You never told me that. But Nicky did. I wasn't around, and you had no one to turn to but him. I understand that now. For the longest time, I hated you, or tried to. But Litchfield was so filled with you. There were memories of you there. Of us. I couldn't get rid of them. No matter how hard I tried. I think that's why I was with Wren for so long. _

_It was just about sex. She was someone new. Not someone from the past. Someone who didn't know you and didn't really know what you had been through. I might have told her a little too much and ranted about you to her, but I had no one really. She felt like the only person I could talk to. Nicky was my friend, but she was your friend too, as much as I hated it. You guys had formed a family outside of Litchfield, and I hated it. I felt so alone and abandoned again. Not only by you, but by Nicky. By everyone who left Litchfield. _

_Wren, I felt, was my only companion in the world. She listened to me. She sided with me, and that's what I needed at the time. For someone to be on my fucking side for once, I guess. _

_I'm rambling now. See, I told you I wasn't fucking good at these things. _

_I just wanted to tell you again why I did what I did and how I am not pleased with myself. _

_By the time you read all this, I have left though. _

_It will be easier this way on everyone. You have a beautiful family here, and I don't want to disturb that any more than I already have. _

_I love you so much, Piper. I just want you to be happy. And I know you won't be if I stay around. You hate me. And I know that what I told you – what I've done – has brought up old wounds for you. I want you to get better. I don't want you to return to that dark place I know you have inside of you. _

_You are strong, Pipes. So strong. You are one of the strongest people I know. You have been through so much, and you're still going. That amazes me. You are a lot stronger than what you are given credit for. You were once just this plain boring yuppy, but you are so much more than that, now. _

_So please, don't turn to your old ways to deal with the pain I know you are feeling. That beautiful little girl needs you. She needs a mommy. No one should have to lose their mom suddenly at such a young age. I know it might feel like you have no one at the moment. That you are hurting over being lied to. But you have a support system. Talk to Nicky. Talk to Lorna. Talk to Polly. Fuck, even talk to Larry. Just talk to someone, Pipes, if you are feeling down. It hurts me to know I'm the reason you are going through all this now. _

_And I wish so much that I could stay and be there for you. But I know that's the last thing you want. _

_So, I'm leaving. _

_I'm sorry, for everything. _

_I love you,_

_Alex_

Piper just stared at the words written on the paper after she finished reading it. She hated how Alex was putting herself down in it. She suddenly craved to hear Alex's voice and just to tell her yet again that she loved her.

Placing the letter on the floor, she reached for her phone. She knew it was late, but she hoped that Alex was up anyways.

"Hello?" a groggy voice answered.

"Hey," whispered Piper shyly.

"Hey," whispered back Alex.

"I woke you up. I'm sorry."

"It's okay, kid. What's up?"

Piper was silent for a moment. She thought about telling Alex that she had just read the letter but decided against it. "Nothing much. I just couldn't sleep and wanted to hear your voice."

She knew it sounded cheesy, and Alex probably thought she was crazy. But she just wanted to talk to her.

"I'm glad you called," whispered Alex in response.

"You are?"

"Mmmhhmm," murmured Alex. "I am."

Piper couldn't help but smile at this. It was amazing how happy she was at the moment.

There was a moment of silence between them as they both tried to think of something to say.

"So, what are you wearing?" asked Alex, playfully.

Piper couldn't help but laugh at this. "What am I wearing?"

"Yeah, what are you wearing?"

Piper smiled sheepishly as she looked down at herself. "Nothing."

"Nothing!?"

"Yeah...nothing...I'm in the tub," she answered honestly.

Alex let out a raspy chuckle in response to this.

* * *

><p>Thanks for reading!<p>

Julie


	22. Chapter 21

Do not own Orange Is the New Black or any of the characters.

I wasn't going to post this but this was originally how the series was suppose to end. Still not sure about that third part but can't seem to let this story go

* * *

><p><span><strong>Rainstorms<strong>

_**Epilogue**_

_Life Goes On..._

_October 2023_

Years ago, on Alex's prison bunk, Piper had asked her about the future.

Alex had joked about doing X on a beach in Cambodia with a butch of strangers in drag. She never given much thought about the future. She only thought a few days ahead at a time. And in Litchfield, she couldn't get passed the darkness in her head on most days, let alone when she got out of the joint. She still wasn't good at thinking about the future, but she didn't have too. She had all that she wanted right in front of her. If she died tomorrow, which she really hoped she fucking didn't, she would die a happy woman.

It wasn't a beach on Cambodia and there weren't any drugs involved. But if someone had told Alex her this would be her future, she would have laughed and told you, you were high.

For the scenario in Cambodia seemed more likeable to her at the time then were she was now.

Alex rolled onto her back and stared at the ring on her left hand. It glistened in the morning rays of light showering into the room from the window. She couldn't believe it. She was married. She was fucking married. And to top it all off, she was married to Piper.

She was Mrs. Piper Fucking Chapman.

Or, Piper was Mrs. Alex Fucking Vause.

She wasn't exactly sure yet what their titles were.

They hadn't decided yet who, or if they would take the each other's last name. The whole wedding had been a little spur of the moment to say the least.

A wide grin appeared on Alex's face as she continued to look at the thin gold band on her finger. Over the last eighteen months, there had been multiple times that she had felt so happy. But this, here, topped all of those times. Her heart felt like it was going to burst any moment.

She was so overjoyed.

"What are you smiling about?" asked Piper as she suddenly came into the bedroom. The blonde's hair was dishevelled still from last night's activities. She was dressed in one of the hotel robes. Her blue eyes gleamed as she came towards the bed.

"Nothing," murmured Alex as she sat up in the bed and locked eyes with Piper. "I just can't get over it."

"I know, me either," whispered Piper as she climbed in to the bed beside Alex and took her hand. She rubbed the pad of her thumb against Alex's wedding ring. She couldn't believe that they were married either. It felt so surreal to her. The last time, she remembered feeling so happy like this was when Issy had been born. Nothing would ever top the birth of her daughter, but this came pretty fucking close. For Piper was finally married to the love of her life.

A comforting silence fell over the two women as they looked down at their interlocked fingers for a moment.

"Come here," whispered Alex as she tugged on Piper's hand and looked up at her face.

A smile appeared on Piper's face as she locked eyes with Alex. She looked beautiful, she thought. More beautiful than the day they had met, twenty years ago to the date.

Neither spoke another word as their lips met in a tender kiss.

xxx

"I guess we have another adventure to add to the scrapbook," whispered Alex as she came up behind Piper and planted a soft kiss to the back of her neck.

Piper couldn't help but smile as she felt Alex's arm wrap around her stomach. She leaned back into her as she continued to look down at the photos from last night on the camera. She guessed their wedding did count as another adventure for them. There had been so many over the last eighteen months that she might have to take some older pictures out to make room for the wedding photos.

Or start a whole new scrapbook all together.

Her smile deepened as she flicked to the next picture on the camera. It was a photo of all three of them. Issy, who was six now was standing in between Alex and Piper. She was holding both of their hands as she smiled broadly into the camera. She had lost her first tooth, two days ago on the first day they had arrived at the resort. The little girl had been upset that the Tooth-Fairy wouldn't know where she was, but they had managed to convince her that the Tooth-Fairy had a special GPS for teeth.

"She looks like you," whispered Alex as Piper flicked to the next picture which was just of Issy.

"You always say that," whispered back Piper.

"It's the truth. She does," Alex nuzzled her face into the side of Piper's neck at this, pulling her even closer than she already was. "It scary sometimes how much of you is in her."

Piper couldn't help but laugh slightly at this, "You got two Chapman women to deal with now."

"I know," murmured Alex in a low voice. "How will I survive?" She then once again kissed the side of Piper's neck.

Alex knew that she would survive. She had survived twenty years already of loving Piper. And she knew she would be able to survive another twenty or more years loving her and her daughter.

For they would always be heart, her world, no matter fucking what.


End file.
